Page 44 of Fathers of the Bride

He nodded again. “Yes, sir.”

“You have cheesecake on your chin,” I said, then forged on, “And the two of you will write your own vows.”

They nodded together.

“Okay. I think I can make the rest of the decisions. Except for the maid of honor. Have you given that anymore thought?”

“Avery has his best man all lined up,” she said, even though it wasn’t an answer.

“That’s good. But I asked about you. Maid of honor? Bridesmaids?”

“I asked my friend Wendy to be maid of honor, but she turned me down.”

“How could she do that?”

“She’s my friend from the Women’s Studies program. Weddings are dripping with patriarchal privilege. She might not even come. Watching women get yoked to men isn’t really her thing.”

“That’s not—I mean, you don’t think you’ll feel—yoked? Do you?” Avery asked, looking panicked.

I decided to save him. “Honestly, I don’t understand that attitude. It’s not like you’re being traded for a half a dozen sheep.”

“Kelly’s worth a hundred thousand million sheep.”

“Could we stop talking about sheep?” she asked.

“Cousin Martha wants to be maid of honor,” Avery said.

“But Kelly’s never met her,” I pointed out.

Avery shrugged. “She’s going to be family, though.”

“What about the Peace Corps? Did you make any friends who might want to be in the wedding?”

“Daddy, those friends are in Africa.”

“Kel, it’s time to Facetime the moms.”

“Wait, you just saw them two days ago,” I pointed out.

Avery rolled his eyes and said, “I know. They’re just a tiny bit co-dependent.”

“All right, coming,” Kelly said as she took a fork out of a drawer, scooped out the last bit of cheesecake and followed him out of the room.

I straightened up the dishes they’d left, and as I did something occurred to me. An idea. A devious and inappropriate idea which virtually guaranteed I was going to do it. I started the dishwasher and then left the kitchen. I slipped off my shoes and then slowly began to creep up the stairs to the second floor. Kelly’s bedroom was just around the corner from the stairs. The master bedroom, my bedroom was further down the hallway.

As I reached the top floor, I heard Pudge’s voice, “It’s going to be a night no one will ever forget!”

“That’s great, Mom,” Avery said. “We’re looking forward to it.”

“Oh, I just wish we could help out with the wedding,” Lissa said. “You can’t really want some dinky little do.”

I knew it. I knew they wouldn’t stick to the agreement. They wanted to plan the wedding, too. “Dinky little do.” What was wrong with words like intimate, cozy, chic? And besides—how could they be criticizing a wedding—the wedding my daughter asked for—without knowing what it was going to be? And I knew they didn’t know what it was going to be because I didn’t know what it was going to be.

“We’re fine,” Avery said. Then he lowered his voice. “It’s her dads. They’re having some…”

While I couldn’t hear the rest, I understood it from Pudges response, “Sweetheart, we offered to share expenses. Hell, we’ll pay for the whole thing if you let us give you adecentwedding.”

I crept forward. I was very nearly right outside Kelly’s door. It was open, just a crack.