Page 33 of Fathers of the Bride

“Oh, but less than two hundred is a tiny wedding,” Pudge said. “Miniscule.”

“We won’t consider them married if there are less than four hundred guests,” Lissa added.

“We have a position in the community after all,” Bradley said.

Then Andy did something even more unthinkable: He agreed with me. “Kelly’s thinking small and simple. And I’m fairly certain that what she means by small and simple is actually small and simple.”

“If it’s a question of money,” Bradley said.

“We don’t mind chipping in,” Pudge added. “We’re happy to pay our share.”

“And by ‘our share’,” Bradley agreed. “We mean that we’re happy to pay for it all. Lock, stock and bridesmaids.”

“It’s not a question of money,” Andy said. Though it was at least partly a question of money. The last few years having been less than lucrative.

Surprisingly, he gave me a look that set me completely off balance—I hadn’t seen it in such a long time. When you parent with someone you develop a nonverbal language of looks, head tilts, eyebrow lifts, tics and winks that allow you to navigate moments like this—though usually it’s done over the head of a five-year-old.

The way he lifted his eyebrows and almost imperceptibly tilted his head told me that I needed to back him up—

“He’s right. It’s definitely not a question of money,” I said. “Not at all. It’s a question of what Kelly wants.”

“Oh, but she’s a child,” Pudge said. “How does she know what she wants?”

“It isherwedding,” Andy said.

“That’s what I thought the first time I got married. Boy, was I wrong,” Pudge said.

“Tell me about it,” Lissa agreed. “I got the wedding my mother always wanted.”

“Ditto.”

Bradley had a smug look on his face. I got the impression he’d heard this all before. Then he said, “Don’t look at me. All I had to do was show up. Both times!”

I said, “If you got the wedding your mother wanted, shouldn’t you want Kelly and Avery to have the wedding they want? Since you were denied—”

“Oh God no!” Pudge exclaimed. “I told my mother I wanted to get married on the beach at sunset, barefoot and with flowers in my hair. I also told her I wanted to feed my guests In-N-Out Burger. I was such a rebel.”

“But shouldn’t you have gotten what you wanted?”

“NO! My God—the sand alone. Our service was at Hollywood United, flowers for days. And the reception at the Chateau Marmont—salmon en croute with the most amazing hollandaise.”

Actually, that sounded wonderful. Then, Pudge leaned forward and whispered, “Honestly, I think it was the highlight of the entire marriage.”

Lissa said, “Oh stop!” before I realized Pudge was talking about her marriage to Lissa’s current husband. At least, I think—

“I have to say,” Andy began. “Our Kelly is the kind of girl who knows what she wants.”

“Well, as much as girlscanknow what they want,” Bradley said.

I glanced at Andy, who was beginning to seethe, then at Pudge and Lissa. They were smirking. Smirking!? What was so funny?

“Do notevertake him seriously,” Pudge said.

Then Lissa added, “What he meant to say, was that Kelly just needs a little coaxing.”

“Convincing.”

“Enticing.”