Page 4

“ A nd how would you like your eg—” I stop mid-sentence when Dev charges through the diner door, coming straight for me. His eyes look so focused and determined, I feel my pussy throb and fear tense all my muscles at the same time.

“Excuse us.” He speaks to the couple that I'm serving before grabbing my wrist and dragging me through the back door. Once we’re outside and alone, he drops me from his grasp as if my skin is scorching him.

“What the hell was that, Dev? I’m at wor?—”

“Do you love my brother?” he asks, pressing his palm against the wall behind me and trapping me in. His chest is rising and falling like he’s furious, his eyes are boring into mine, daring me to lie, and even though I know how dangerous this man is, I can’t help but feel attracted to the danger.

“Of course, I do,” I whisper. “I just–”

“I need you to get back together with him.” He shocks me,

“But I thought–”

“Whatever you thought, you thought wrong. Corey loves you, he’d give up anything to be with you, and I need him to give up on wanting to join the club.” His huge, muscular body overpowers me.

“I love him, but–”

“No buts, Millie. ” Dev points his finger in my face, and when his eyes drop to look down at my body, I feel my skin tingle where his eyes touch. “You are the only person who can make him see sense. You tell him he has to choose between you and the club.”

“I’m not doing that, it’s cruel.” I shake my head, hearing the fear in my voice as I stand up to him.

“You said you love him; this is the only way to protect him,” he tells me.

“I do love him, but not the way he wants me to. I’m eighteen, and I’ve grown up a lot since we first got together. I care for Corey with all my heart, but I don’t—” I gasp when Dev's hand covers my mouth, pinning me to the wall and unexpectedly making my panties dampen at the same time.

“You’ll do as you're fuckin’ told. Call Corey, tell him you made a mistake. Tell him you don’t want him joinin’ the club.” His hand slowly slides from my mouth, sliding under my chin and wrapping around my throat. “He loves you, Millie, just let him do that.”

“It wouldn’t be real.” I shake my head, feeling tears slide over my cheeks.

“I don’t care if it’s real; what I care about is keeping him protected. That's all I’ve ever cared about.”

“I can’t, it wouldn’t be right. I love Corey as a friend, and I won’t lead him on.” I put my foot down.

“This isn’t leading him on, it’s keeping him alive.

The club has lost two members in less than five months; last night, we nearly lost a couple more.

Do you want your friend to be the next one we lose?

C’mon, Millie, I’ve seen you together. I know how much you care for him.

Just…try a little harder.” He swallows thickly as his voice gets weaker.

“I’m sorry, but I can–”

“Why?” His fingers tighten around my neck, and his eyes grow darker.

“What fuckin’ changed? Just a few weeks ago, you were runnin’ around my house in your underwear, laughin’.

Lookin’ all happy and shit. What fuckin’ changed, Millie?

” I know what Dev does for the club, Corey’s told me all the gory details.

He’s an enforcer; his job is to punish and to get information by any means possible.

“Don’t.” I shake my head and warn him, as my tears start flowing faster.

“Tell me,” he hisses through his teeth, almost choking me.

“My feelings for you,” I blurt out, watching his eyes widen and his head shake. “I started to realize that the feeling I got in the pit of my stomach whenever I saw you wasn’t fear… It was?—”

“Don’t you dare .” He slams his free hand over my mouth again. “I don’t ever wanna hear shit like that come out your mouth, ever again. I’m a grown fuckin’ man, and you… You’re just a girl.” His lip snarls in disgust.

“You're gonna forget any more thoughts like that and fix this shit with my brother.” He looks as if he’s gonna kill me, and I instantly regret my confession. What the hell was I thinking?

“Do you understand, little girl?” he growls at me, and despite the position he has me in, I’m still feeling thrills instead of fear.

“No.” I shake my head against his hold. “I don’t understand. If you loved Corey, you’d want better for him than this.”

“Like I said, I just want him alive.” He releases me and marches to the bottom of the alley while I touch my hand to my throat and get my breath back.

“How was your first day, pumpkin?” Dad asks when I walk through the door.

“It went well, the people there are nice.” I smile at him as I make my way toward the stairs. Hopefully, he gets the hint that I’m not in the mood for chatting.

“Your mom tells me you and Corey broke up.” He speaks in that soft tone that always soothed me as a child.

“It was the right thing to do.” I shrug sadly.

“The two of you have been together a while. What changed your mind?” he asks, stepping closer to me.

“We’ve just grown apart, Daddy, don’t read too much into it.” I kiss his cheek to assure him that I’m okay.

“You know, I’m visiting the children's hospice tomorrow, you could come along and help hand out some of the toys we have for them.”

“Sounds good.” I nod, heading past him and straight up to my room. I’m stuck between a rock and a hard place with a real tough decision to make.

My phone is still ringing at least every half an hour, and I can’t pick it up until I’ve decided for sure what I want to say.

Dev is right about Corey joining the club, it’s a dream of his, but it would never work, Corey is far too kind to be an outlaw biker.

He hasn’t got a trace of malice inside his body.

And it would be such a waste of his talent; with the brains he’s been blessed with, he could be anything he wants to be.

It's unfortunate that all he’s ever wanted to be is his big brother.

Thinking about Dev again gets me all flustered, and at the same time, causes that ache deep inside me.

I’ve never felt it for anyone other than him, not even during one of mine and Corey’s many, many make-out sessions.

By now, the two of us should have gone all the way, but it’s never felt right.

I always felt cared for with Corey. I always felt safe. What I didn’t feel was desire.

The fact I feel that desire for Dev is wrong, and above everything else, it’s pointless. I would never hurt Corey’s feelings by acting upon it, and even if I were to be that cruel, Dev wouldn’t be interested in a girl like me.

I’ve been to a few of the club beach parties, and I’ve seen the kind of girls who hang around him.

They all have experience and sex appeal.

I wouldn’t know the first thing about pleasuring a man like him.

The thought of being one of those girls, just for one night, makes my skin flush with heat.

Pulling my waitress's dress up to my waist, I lie back on my bed and slide my hand into my cotton panties. My pussy is already wet, it has been since I felt his fingers grip my throat. Seeing him so agitated was hot as hell, and having that aggression directed at me felt like some kind of fucked-up reward. Dev rarely gives me any attention; sometimes I swear he purposely avoids looking at me as punishment. But today, I had all his focus. My finger slips between my pussy lips, stroking softly as I pretend he’s the one doing the touching.

I wonder if he kisses those whores while he fucks them.

I wonder if he cares about giving them pleasure, or if he just uses them to get himself off.

“Knock. Knock.” I hear my mother's voice and panic.

“Just a second.” I quickly pull my hand away, standing back up and yanking my dress back down before I race to the door, take a breath, and open it.

“Ahhh, Daddy said you were home.” She smiles at me and steps past me to come inside. “That boy's here to see you.” Her smile fades into scorn.

“That boy has a name,” I remind her, realizing that I can’t spend any more time avoiding him. Not now that he’s started turning up here.

“He also has a reputation.” Mom rolls her eyes.

“No, his brother does. Corey isn’t a biker, Mom. He’s different.”

“Now, you know I have nothing against the bikers. ” She says the word as if it carries a disease. “They have done some very charitable work lately, your father speaks highly of them. But that doesn’t mean we want our little girl involv–”

“I’m eighteen. Not a little girl anymore,” I interrupt to remind her.

Thinking of the way Dev called me that earlier makes a shiver travel down my spine.

“You’ll always be our little girl.” Mom smiles softly as she strokes my cheek.

“I should go speak to Corey.” I smile back as I move past her and down the stairs.

I find Corey waiting in the room that Mother calls ‘the drawing room’. I've always wondered why, because no one in the house is remotely artistic. It’s just another one of her over-the-top attempts to impress.

“Hi.” I smile awkwardly as I enter.

“Hi, yourself.” Corey looks as if he hasn’t slept in weeks; his eyes are bloodshot with dark, heavy bags beneath them.

“You haven’t picked up any of my calls,” he speaks softly as he moves closer.

“It’s been a busy day.”

“I figured. I wanted to know how your first day went.” He reaches out to take my hand, then hesitates and pulls back. Seeing how much this is killing him is heartbreaking.

“It went great, the people who work there are really nice and–”

“I’m sorry,” he interrupts me. “I don’t know what I was thinking when I asked you that stupid question…

” His cheeks flush pink. “I guess the end of high school just feels so final and uncertain.” He looks tortured and confused, and I want so much to comfort him, but at the same time, I don’t want to give him the wrong impression.

“Corey, it wasn’t just the proposal. For a while now, I’ve been feeling…” I pause when I can’t find the words.

“You love me, Millie, I know you do.” He takes my hands desperately in his. “Come on, this is us. We can work it out.”

“I do love you, but not in the way you want me to. Don’t you think it’s a little crazy that the two of us have never…?” I look over my shoulder in case my parents are eavesdropping.

“No, I don’t find that strange at all. You're a nice girl, Millie, a decent girl. You’re saving that moment for when the time's right for us, and I want that, too. I want you to have everythin’ you want.

” I feel the pressure of Dev’s fingers pressing around my throat, along with the heavy weight of guilt.

“I’d wait forever for you, you know that. ”

“Corey,” I sigh.

“No, don’t look at me like that. I want to know why you're throwing all this away.” His grip on my arm tightens as his voice gets more desperate.

All I can hear is Dev's voice in my head, and it forces out the words that come next.

“I don’t want to be a biker’s whore,” I speak out, already hating myself for doing this to him, and the way he stares back at me, confused, has me feeling even worse.

“A…A what…? Millie, you wouldn’t be a fuckin’ whore, you’d be my old lady.”

“Come on, Corey, look at this place. Look at me, do I look like someone's old lady?” I hate myself for what I’m doing, but I have to save Corey from himself.

Maybe I should try harder to love him the way I should.

I’m never gonna find a guy that treats me better and loves me as hard as he does.

I can’t let the way I feel for his mean, older brother ruin my chance to be happy.

What I have for Dev is just a crush. A stupid, ridiculous crush!

“So what are ya sayin’, Millie?” I hear the pain in Corey’s voice.

“I’m saying that I don’t want to marry a biker.”

“You wanna marry a doctor?” He shakes his head as that pain makes it all the way to his eyes. He’s disappointed because he thought I was different.

“Take that however you want it, Corey.” I pull my hands away from his so I can step away. Lying to him feels so awful.

“You know how much becoming a member of the club means to me. You’ve always known. You’ve always supported it.” I refuse to turn around and see any more of his hurt.

“People change,” I whisper, closing my eyes and trying not to cry.

“So what you're sayin’ is that it’s you or the club?” he questions, and I slowly nod my head.

“You know, I never thought you would make me choose between the two things in the world that matter most to me.” He steps up behind me, and I freeze when his hand rests on my waist. “I love you, Millie Dawson. I love you with every single part of me, but I’m destined to be a Soul.

I need it. Don’t you understand that?” He spins me round to face him.

“Are you really asking me to make the choice?” he checks again, and I find the nerve to look up into his eyes and nod.

“Then I guess I have some serious thinkin’ to do.” He drops his head so he can kiss my forehead, before he turns and walks away.