Page 9

Three Years Ago – All Star Break

Alice

The car ride to the Leelanau Peninsula started off awkward and tense as we navigated the worst of the storm in Robbie’s truck, but somewhere past Cadillac, Jordan started to relax more.

The whole time, he made sure I stayed alert, watched for accidents on the highway, and fed me snacks, not to mention he played my favorite Taylor Swift songs. It was … unexpected.

This week is turning out completely different than I thought.

Robbie and Olivia were supposed to join us for a week of snowboarding and fun at the cabin, but instead, Olivia’s plane was delayed from Minnesota.

With how much snow was coming down in Grand Marquee, Robbie suggested that Jordan and I go ahead without them and try to make the best of it.

I expected Jordan to bail almost immediately, but he quietly helped pack up the truck and has been mostly silent throughout the ride.

Ever since my birthday a few weeks ago, our friendship has been getting better, back on track. At least that’s what I thought. Although I can’t stop thinking about that night when I kissed him. The night he rejected me.

I shake the memory away and reach for my water bottle in the center, but before I can wrap my hand around it blindly, Jordan springs into action and hands it to me, our fingers brushing with the movement.

I take my eyes off the road for a second to glance at him and my heart skips a beat just like all the other times I’m near him.

Am I always going to be destined to love Jordan, only for him to never feel the same way about me?

“Thank you,” I say, and hand the bottle back. He quickly takes it, almost like he’s been watching my every move, anticipating what I’ll do next.

“Thanks for driving,” he says quietly. “Never been a huge fan of driving in the snow. I’d much rather navigate.”

I flash him a big smile and decide to tease him a little, lightening up the mood. “You just want to be a passenger princess.”

Jordan makes a little indignant sound in the back of his throat and says, “What is a passenger princess ?”

My laugh gets him to turn his body towards me, giving me his full attention. “You know,” I say, shaking my head and laughing again, “it’s when the front seat passenger gets to be pampered, enjoying snacks, being in control of the music, and not doing the hard work of driving.”

Jordan smiles and I can’t help but bite my lip, enjoying the fact he’s letting some of his walls down and showing me his playful side again.

“You know, I think you would make a perfect passenger princess,” he says, gaze locked on my profile.

“Yeah?” I ask, blushing a little.

“You just have that vibe about you.”

I hum, “Maybe when we get back to the city, you can drive me around every now and then.”

“Maybe,” he says, still looking at me.

Oh, what I wouldn’t give to be Jordan’s passenger princess.

“Any last supplies you think we’ll need for the week? We’re about to pass the last grocery store for a bit.”

“I’m all set. Robbie packed for four people, so I think we’ll make it,” he replies.

“True. I hope Olivia made it okay. I want them to have a good time even if they couldn’t come.”

“I’m sure they will,” he says reassuringly, and taps his fingers on the center console, his body still partly turned towards me.

“So,” I say lamely, and drum my fingers on the steering wheel and blow out a breath.

“Yeah?” Jordan prods, like he’s looking for something, anything, to make conversation with me as well.

“What do you want to do this week?”

He half shrugs and I can’t help but look over at him. He looks so damn cute in a cable-knit cream sweater and dark blue jeans that look a little tight over his strong, muscular thighs. His face looks cleanly shaved, and his brown eyes take on a chocolate hue in the light of day.

I feel a tightness in my chest and remember to breathe as I maneuver the truck through the small unplowed roads of the peninsula.

The cabin looks as good as ever when we pull into the driveway. My parents were here a month ago and they decorated the wraparound porch with wreaths and left the holiday lights up. The garage door is blocked by half a foot of snow, so I park to the side of it and turn the engine off.

“I’ll go through the garage side door and open it. We should have some shovels in there, if you don’t mind helping,” I say, batting my eyelashes.

“Of course, I’ve been pampered enough on the ride,” Jordan says with a smile, and puts his gloves on.

After thirty minutes of shoveling, the driveway doesn’t look much different than when we started, which only shows how much snow keeps coming down. But at least the garage is unobstructed so we can pull the car in and start unloading.

As soon as we enter the cabin, I’m hit with the smell of sandalwood and patchouli, and I smile at my mom’s choice of essential oils. This has always been her favorite and I can’t deny that it smells divine.

Jordan makes a few trips to the car and brings everything we need inside as I put food away in the fridge.

When I’m done, I step away from the large kitchen island, and into the living room.

My eyes take in the place that’s been a stepping stone for every single core memory I have.

Birthdays, Christmases, New Years—they all happened right here at this cabin.

The fireplace has seen better days, but there is dry wood next to it.

No doubt my dad paid someone to stop by and stock the place up for us.

The pictures on top of the mantel show all of us Elliots over the years, but the one that snags my attention is a family picture from Michael and Tangela’s wedding.

We were all in our best attire, but towards the end of the night, when everyone had let loose not just their ties and shoe straps, but also their inhibitions.

We look like one big happy family, everyone laughing and smiling, clinking together champagne flutes.

“That has to be one of my favorite days,” Jordan says from behind me, and I startle.

His hands land on my shoulders as he steadies me, and I blink up at him.

He’s so cute, with a dopey smile on his face as he reminisces about that night.

Does he remember how we danced together that night, and how I called him cute?

“Why is that?” I ask, finally finding my voice.

“All our friends and family were there, and we were celebrating love. I’ll never forget it,” he says, gaze moving from the picture to me.

The chocolate hue is gone now, but his eyes are just another lovely shade of brown.

They get darker as his eyes roam over my face and his thumb moves back and forth on my navy blue sweatshirt, near my collarbone.

I shiver and he stops the movement, but he doesn’t pull away. Jordan steps in and gives me a tentative hug, and I’m so stunned that for a moment, I just stand there, arms at my sides.

But then the sweet scent of him envelops me and I lose all train of thought, melting into him, wrapping my arms around his waist.

“You’re cold,” he says, pulling back and rubbing my arms up and down. “I’ll start a fire.”

I nod but don’t let go of his waist right away, basking in his closeness for a moment longer, my cheek pressed against his heart.

“I’ll make us some hot cocoa,” I say when I finally step away.

Jordan

When Robbie said we should go ahead without them, I thought it was a terrible idea. I almost bailed. Almost . It was the sight of Alice bundled up in her favorite leggings and navy blue sweatshirt with a pink pom-pom hat on her head, ready to go to the cabin, that stopped me.

The weather was worse than I expected, and I made sure not to distract her while she drove us, even though all I wanted was to finally talk to her and see how she was doing after her birthday.

The truth is, I want to spend time with her constantly because she’s funny and a great conversationalist, and even though I might have some unresolved feelings for her that I could never act on, that doesn’t mean I should ignore her.

I tried keeping my distance, but that never seemed to fucking work in the past. Not until she kissed me that night two years ago and I completely freaked out. My biggest regret was not explaining why I needed to put some distance between us. I was so terrified of letting her in.

And yet, I can’t help but feel drawn to her like a moth to the flame.

I like her.

Even though I have no right to, I want to be the person she confides in, the one she's not afraid to ask for help. I want to be there for her.

Maybe that’s why I hugged her. The urge to hold her in my arms as she shivered was so strong, I couldn’t help myself.

Outside, the snow is still coming down, blanketing the backyard and the frozen lake in a thick layer of white.

Inside, the fire is roaring as we unpack more things, stocking up the pantry with breads and muffins, chips and various snacks.

As Alice makes us hot cocoa with mini marshmallows and caramel syrup, I pull out a few board games from the shelf near the fireplace.

“Do you want to play card games or strategy games?” I ask, holding up Power Grid and Exploding Kittens .

Alice wrinkles her nose in the cutest way and I’m so dumbstruck, staring at her pretty face, cataloging her bow-shaped lips and small button nose, that I miss her answer.

“Sorry, which one?” I ask.

She giggles as she places our drinks down on the coffee table, and even that small little noise gets me all flustered. What is wrong with me?

“I said, maybe we can play later. We should get some dinner started soon, since it seems like we’re kind of stuck here for the rest of the day. It’s snowing too much to hit the slopes,” she says with a sigh.

I frown, looking out through the window to the front of the cabin and notice how much snow there really is accumulating on the roads. “Think we’ll be fine with the truck tomorrow?”

“Probably. They’ll plow the roads at least, but we’ll need to take care of the driveway in the morning. There’s a snow blower somewhere in the garage as well as shovels.”

“Should be fine, then. Are you excited to snowboard?” I ask, and take a seat next to her on the couch as we both sip on our hot cocoa and look at the fireplace, the faint smell of smoke and burning wood permeating the air.

Alice grins and fiddles with her hair with one hand, cradling the mug with the other. “So excited, can’t wait to kick your ass racing down the slope.”

I scoff, bumping her knee with mine as I bring it to the couch to face her more. “Yeah, right.”

“Oh, I’m serious, I need my rematch from a couple years ago.”

“Didn’t realize it was a competition,” I say, giving her a smile.

“It’s always a competition, J.”

God , the urge to kiss the smug smile off her face right now is so strong.

“What do you want for dinner?” I ask to change the topic, even though all I want to do is keep on teasing her, talking about everything and nothing in particular.

“Grilled cheese and soup?” she asks, looking at me with big blue hopeful eyes.

I chuckle at her favorite comfort food choice and say, “Sounds delicious.”