Page 57 of Captivated (Salvation #3)

Chapter Forty-Nine

Robert smiled as he stepped into Toby’s room. “Hey, you’re out of bed.”

Toby sat in a chair by the window. His face lit up when he saw the flowers in Robert’s hand. “Aw, that’s sweet. Thank you. They’re beautiful.” He spoke in a low voice, his speech stilted and a little breathless.

Robert laid them on the bed. “I’ll go in search of water in a second.” He smiled. “After the important stuff.” He went over to Toby and bent down to kiss him. “Good morning.”

Toby sighed. “Morning, sweetheart.”

The door opened and the nurse entered. She smiled when she saw the bouquet. “Oh, they’re gorgeous. I’ll find you a vase.”

“I was going to do that,” Robert protested.

“You stay right there. Toby always looks better when you’re around. You’re the best medicine for him.” She scooped up the flowers and disappeared out of the door.

Robert dragged another chair closer to Toby’s and sat facing him. “How are you doing this morning?”

Toby huffed. “I went for a walk after breakfast.” Robert arched his eyebrows and Toby smiled. “Around my room. I think it took me ten minutes to move six feet. I feel like I’ve been hit by a bus.”

“Your ribs are healing, remember? And you’re still a mass of bruises. You had surgery. Everything is gonna hurt for a while.”

“It’s not just the pain. I feel exhausted most of the time. The nurse said I could take a shower without supervision this morning. First time since I got here.”

“And?”

Toby grimaced. “I had to rest after it. Just standing up for that short time…” He paused. “Dr. Ramirez stopped by earlier.”

“What did he have to say?” It couldn’t be anything bad, otherwise Robert would have received a call.

“I asked him about the pain and the tiredness. He said anesthesia is as much an assault on my body as everything else, because it can sit in the tissues for up to a year.” Toby gestured to his bruises. “Tissues that are still full of blood. I also asked him when I’d feel like myself again.”

Judging by his grave expression, Toby hadn’t liked the answer.

“What was his estimate?”

Toby swallowed. “Six months. Maybe.”

Robert took Toby’s hand in his. “So it takes six months. It’s not as if you’ll be in here, right? It won’t be long before you’re back at Salvation.”

Toby bit his lip. “But it’ll be a while before we get to share a scene.”

He smiled. “Which will make it all the better when we finally get there. And in the meantime…” He grinned. “I get to do all the work.”

Toby’s eyes twinkled. “Oh, I see. So that’s how it’s going to be?”

Robert squeezed his hand. “Plenty of time to think about that when you’re out of here. Now… you wanna hear my news?”

Toby’s faint chuckle was music to Robert’s ears.

“Let me guess. Butch and Sol got engaged. Walt is in a throuple with a guy and a girl. Teague bought himself some leather pants and a harness.” Each sentence was separated by a breathless pause, and Robert could tell getting the words out was a real chore.

He blinked at that last one. “What do you know about Teague that I don’t?”

Toby gave a knowing smile. “Just a hunch. So none of my guesses were anywhere near the mark?”

“Nope.” He relinquished Toby’s hand and leaned back in his chair. “Zeeb and Nate are an item.”

Toby stared at him. “That’s great.”

“It’s early days, but yeah, it seems kinda official. And they do look good together.” When Toby fell silent, Robert gave him an inquiring glance. “What’s on your mind?”

“I have an idea. Something for Zeeb and Nate. I figured this was coming, and with everything going on I’m guessing Zeeb isn’t in a lot better shape, so I’ve had it cooking in the back of my head. I’d like you and the guys to make it happen for me.”

Robert listened as Toby talked, speaking slowly. By the time he’d finished, Robert was grinning.

“I like it. I’ll get onto it right away when I’m back at the ranch.”

“Is there any news about the bastards who did this?”

Robert shook his head. “Zeeb thinks we should get ourselves a really good lawyer. In his words, ‘A really good, shit-hot lawyer, who isn’t afraid to muddy the water.’” Toby stilled, and Robert stared at him. “Do you know any lawyers?”

He smiled. “I know one—and so do you. He’s one of our Deliverance regulars.”

Robert frowned. “Wait a minute.” He smacked his thigh. “Adam Weston. Of course.”

Toby nodded. “Something to think about. His contact details are on my laptop at the house.” He expelled a slow breath, and his face tightened.

“I think you need to rest,” Robert said in a gentle voice.

“I think you’re right.” Toby tilted his head. “Go home and put our plan into action. And take pictures when it’s done. I want to see.”

“I don’t have to go now. I can stay a while.” Robert hated the hour-long drive, but he’d do it as many times as necessary.

“Maybe you could ask Dr. Ramirez if I can be moved to another hospital, now I’m stabilized? Gallatin County Hospital, maybe?”

That plaintive note in Toby’s voice told Robert he hated the distance between them too.

“I’ll ask.” He also wanted to know when Toby could come home.

I need him.

It felt as though half of him was missing.

The afternoon sun slanted low, casting gold across the paddock, but the air held a chill that signaled the end of summer.

A summer that had changed Zeeb’s life beyond recognition.

I didn’t see Nate coming, that’s for damn sure.

He leaned on the rail, watching the horses in the paddock. Nate and Paul were in the stable, mucking out.

Zeeb hadn’t even asked if he could help. He knew what the answer would be.

His hat was pulled low, shading his eyes, but that didn’t prevent him from spying Butch walking toward him, his heavy boots scraping the gravel path from the Leather Barn.

Zeeb smiled to himself. I don’t need three guesses to know what he’s been doin’ in there. There was an air of contentment clinging to him, but there was also an awkwardness in his gait, a stiffness, as though walking was uncomfortable.

Zeeb’s smile morphed into a grin. Oh yeah. I definitely know what he’s been up to.

Butch came to a stop at Zeeb’s side.

“Well, hell.” Butch’s voice was all drawl and mischief. “Didn’t expect to find the mighty Zeeb Nolan pining like a teenage girl at a Sadie Hawkins dance.” He glanced around. “Where’s the boyfriend?”

Zeeb jerked his thumb toward the stable. “In there with Paul.”

Butch regarded him with a puzzled expression. “What you grinning at?”

He snickered. “You. Kinda walkin’ funny there, Butch. I’m guessin’ that has something to do with Sol. Is his equipment on the large side?”

Butch flushed. “None of your damn business.” He leaned on the rail. “How are you doing, cowboy? Still hangin’ in there?”

“Yup. Still healing.”

And thinking. Doing a lot of thinking.

Butch said nothing for a moment, but stared out at the paddock, his gaze following the horses. “You all right, Zeeb?”

Zeeb hesitated for a second, then sighed. “Yeah. No. Hell, I dunno.”

That earned him a long side-glance. “Well, that clears it up.”

Zeeb’s lips twitched, but he didn’t take the bait. He pushed his hat up and gazed out across the land.

Talk about great timing.

If he had to pick a more perfect sounding board, he couldn’t have done better than Butch.

He knows what I’m going through. He’s been there.

Zeeb cleared his throat. “Can I ask you something?”

“Sure, but if it’s about the recipe for Sol’s banana bread recipe, I ain’t sharing it. That man has secrets.”

Zeeb snorted. “He makes banana bread, and I’m only hearing about it now?” He fell silent.

“Well, if you’re gonna ask something, ask it,” Butch demanded with a touch of irritation.

“What was it like for you?” Zeeb blurted. “Your first time. With a guy.”

Butch didn’t speak for a long moment. Then he turned toward Zeeb, his elbow on the fence. “You askin’ logistics? Or the head stuff?”

“Head stuff,” Zeeb said. “I mean—yeah, the logistics we’ll figure out. But… I’ve only ever been with women. I know how that feels. The sex was always good, but this—this is different.”

Butch frowned. “Different how?”

Zeeb shrugged. “Different like… it matters. Like I can’t pretend I don’t care how it goes. I want it to be right. For him. For me.”

Butch let that hang in the air, his gaze thoughtful. Then he gave a slow nod.

“Yeah,” he said. “I remember that.” Butch scratched at his jaw. “With Teague—and with Race before him—it was easy enough to pretend it was just scratching an itch. A little friction, nothing more.”

Zeeb quirked an eyebrow. “How romantic.”

Butch pushed out a self-deprecating chuckle. “Yeah, well, as Sol would probably say, I wasn’t exactly a poster boy for emotional availability back then.”

Zeeb snickered. “You’re good. That sounds just like him.”

“But when he came along…” Butch stopped, his gaze drifting to the horizon. “That was the first time I wanted it to mean something. And that sure as hell scared the shit outta me.”

Zeeb expelled a breath. “Yeah.”

Butch tilted his head, his expression somehow gentler. “You’re thinking about Nate. Wanting it to be good for him.”

Zeeb didn’t answer right away, then gave a tight nod. “You know all the shit he’s been through now. Shit I can’t fix. But I want to show him this ain’t dirty. That it ain’t wrong.”

Butch’s eyes widened. “Damn, Zeeb. That’s a helluva thing to carry.”

“I don’t mind carrying it.”

“No, I don’t suppose you do.” Butch leaned against the rail. “But let me tell you something, man to man. You can’t be his redemption. You can be his partner. His safe place. And that counts. That counts for a lot.”

Zeeb chewed on that for a moment.

“I’m just scared I’ll screw it up.”

Butch gave him a long searching glance. “You won’t. Because you’re thinking about it. Because it matters to you. That’s more than most ever do.”

Zeeb had to ask. “Butch, when it happened the first time… was it weird? Like, the mechanics?”