Page 46 of Can’t Let You Go (Ivy Ridge #3)

FALLON

A fter Jason not so sneakily snuck out of my house, I asked Presley if she would want to go over to Lennie’s grandparents’ house tomorrow. Of course, she said yes, which is why I am now standing in front of my house with a plate of cookies Presley and I spent yesterday baking and decorating.

Jason insisted I didn’t need to bring anything, but it felt wrong to show up to a brunch with nothing to offer.

If anything, it’s something for me to do with my hands, at least for a little bit.

It saves me from the panic of whether I should hold Jason’s hand when we walk in, or if I should hold Presley’s, or shake his mom’s hand, even though I know her quite well.

Ugh. You’re a mess, Fallon. Get it together.

Jason pulls up right as my spiral goes downhill even further, and he climbs out of his car, greeting me with a panty-melting smile. Dammit. Why must he do these things to me? He kisses me on the cheek before picking Presley up and giving her a hug and spin. “Ready to go?” he asks.

He takes the plate of cookies from me and puts them in the backseat between the girls, helping Presley get buckled while I shift anxiously in front of the car. I wait until he closes Presley’s door, and then I burst with questions.

“How are we doing this?” I ask, my mind whirling.

“Are we announcing we’re dating? Is that what we’re doing?

Are we officially dating? I don’t want to take any of Marley’s thunder.

Remember that episode of Friends when Monica and Chandler get engaged and Rachel kisses Ross and Monica says she stole her thunder?

I don’t want to do that. They’re going to ask questions.

What are we telling the girls? They’re going to think we’re getting married. ”

“Breathe.” Jason cups my face in his large hands.

“We can tell them whatever you want, or nothing at all. This is our relationship, so it’s none of their business.

As for the thunder thing, Marley won’t give a shit about that.

She won’t think you’re taking her thunder.

She will be happy for us, no matter what.

But as far as I’m concerned, yes, we are dating.

We’re in a relationship, and seeing where that takes us. ”

“Right,” I murmur. “So what about the girls? We can’t not tell them anything.”

“I’ll think of something,” he says, kissing my forehead. “Now, are you ready?”

“I think so.” I take a deep breath, and Jason opens my door for me. I climb in and buckle up while Jason gets in on his side.

He pulls out of the driveway and shifts his right hand, placing it on my thigh. I wore another sundress today, so he shifts the skirt, resting his hand directly on my skin. He rubs his thumb over it, back and forth in a soothing motion.

The simple touch from him helps soothe my nerves.

The girls are in their own world in the backseat, talking about who knows what.

When we pull up to Jason’s childhood home, that's when the panic really kicks in.

Of course, gentleman that he is, Jason takes the plate of cookies, leaving me defenseless and with nothing to do with my hands.

Jason leads us into the house, and Lennie kicks her shoes off, telling Presley to do the same, before taking her hand and running through the house, announcing our arrival.

Jason directs me through the house, and I desperately want to snatch the cookies from his hands so I have the distraction, but when I try, he simply says, “I’ve got them, sunshine.”

In the bustling kitchen, Jane, Marley’s mom, and Nikki, Jason’s mom, are standing side by side at the stove, preparing the meal.

Marley is sitting at the table, with her nursing cover over her front, and one of the babies underneath it.

Beau holds the other baby in his arms, giving them a bottle.

Josie and Andrew sit beside them, and Josie is crooning over the baby, playing with the soft tufts of dark hair.

No one seems to have noticed our arrival quite yet until Thomas comes in the sliding door from the deck.

“Hey guys,” he says, a huge grin on his face. He has a little gap in his front two teeth I’ve never seemed to notice before, and a set of dimples on his cheeks. “Fallon, it’s good to see you.”

“You too,” I say, waving awkwardly. Josie sees me now, and gives me a knowing smile. I shrug, and Jason rests his hand at the small of my back, leading me into the kitchen.

“Ma,” he greets, kissing his mother’s cheek, and doing the same to Jane’s. “I brought Fallon and her daughter with us, hope that’s okay.”

Nikki turns to greet me with a smile. “Absolutely, we’re so happy to have you here.” She pulls me into a hug, meanwhile, I’m still a little shocked over the fact that Jason didn’t tell anyone we were coming.

“I’m so sorry,” I murmur. “I would have thought he told you we were coming. We don’t have to eat, but I brought some cookies to share.”

“Oh hush,” she responds, pulling away from the hug and taking the cookies from Jase. “We have plenty of food, I’m sure you will even be taking leftovers home with you.”

I glance up at Jason. He’s looking at his mom and I with a softness in his gaze. If I weren't slightly irritated with him for not telling them we were coming, I would find it adorable.

We finish saying hello, and Jason leads me back toward the dining table. “I can’t believe you didn’t tell anyone we were coming, Jase,” I scold, lightly swatting his chest.

“If I would have told them, they would have overreacted, and I know that’s not what you wanted. This way, things are chill.” He glances at his brothers, “Right?”

Beau is the one to respond. “He’s right. We probably would have pressed him a lot harder for information, Andrew especially.” He glances at his youngest brother, who shrugs, and nods in agreement. “But we’re happy you’re here.”

“Thanks,” I respond. I sit down next to Marley, and she gives me a side hug as best she can with her baby latched onto her breast. A slight pang of heartbreak rears its ugly head in my chest. No, my baby wouldn’t be a baby anymore, but I still grieve the moments I lost out on with them.

What I would give to hold the baby for a moment, tell them how much I love them, and miss what could have been.

It can be hard to be around babies, and I’m ashamed to admit that’s part of why I haven’t made as much of an effort to see Marley as I should have.

“How are you? I’m sorry I haven’t seen you much lately. Life is crazy, but that’s no excuse.”

“I’m good,” she responds. “Happy. It’s been a rough few months, adjusting to the twins, and finding a good system and meds for my mental health, but I’m good. I’m in a good spot now.”

I squeeze her shoulder. “Good. I hope you know if you ever need a break or an hour to yourself, I’m happy to pop over and offer a hand.”

“Thank you. I’ll keep that in mind. I’m getting better at accepting help lately.”

“Is it safe to say things are going well?” Josie changes the subject.

I can’t help the smile that comes across my face. I glance up across the table, watching Jason as he converses with his brothers. “Yeah. Things are going well.”

“You two are adorable,” Marley says.

“Thanks.” My cheeks heat under the attention. “It’s… new. Very new.”

“That’s okay, it means you’re still in the honeymoon phase. It’s going to be amazing, I can already tell.” Josie reaches over, clasping my hand in hers and squeezing gently.

“Mom!” Presley’s voice calls from somewhere upstairs.

If she didn’t sound excited I might be worried.

I go to stand, but two sets of pounding footsteps stops me.

Both she and Lennie bound around the corner, arms full of coloring books, Barbies, and an assortment of crayons.

“Look! Lennie’s grandma and grandpa have so many fun things here for her to play with!

Lennie said I could play with her stuff too. ”

“Wow, that’s amazing, sweetie. And so nice of Lennie to share with you.” I push back a piece of hair that’s fallen into her face, and smile at Lennie, standing beside her with the sweetest smile on her face.

“Presley’s my best friend. Even more my bestest friend than my friend Natalie. I like her a lot, but I like Presley mostest,” Lennie says.

“Most,” Jason corrects, coming up to stand behind the girls. “Girls, why don’t you bring the stuff back upstairs for now. It’s almost time to eat. You can play afterwards.”

“Okay!” Presley and Lennie agree, running back toward the stairs and up to the playroom.

Marley and Beau stand, announcing they’re going to lay the babies down in one of the bedrooms. Andrew comes in with his dad and Gramps from outside, and greets me with a hug and a smile.

I’ve never formally met Richard, so it’s nice to meet him.

It’s fun to see the resemblance Jason shares with his parents.

A few minutes later, we are all settled in at the table, dishing up an amazing smelling egg bake Jane and Nikki have made.

The table is packed full of people, full of family .

It’s something I’m not used to. Growing up, it was me, my mom, and my dad.

Both sets of my grandparents passed early, and both my parents were only children, like me.

I never wanted that for Presley. I wanted to give her a big family, with so many people to love her in case something ever happened to me. I thought that was something Brad and I could have, but clearly, that didn’t work out.

As I sit at this family brunch, surrounded by these people who love each other so much, it hits me how much I want this to work. Not only because of Jason, but for the sake of my daughter and me. To have this family too.

“Fallon, how are you liking working for Isaac?” Nikki asks, bringing me out of my reverie .

“Oh, I love it,” I admit. “He’s a great boss. I love working at Meadow Grove too. It’s such a great environment.”

“Fallon’s incredible at her job,” Jason says, glancing down at me. He reaches under the table to rest a hand on my thigh, and I nearly burst into tears. I try to shrug off the compliment. I’ve never been good at receiving them, but Josie pipes in.

“She’s amazing. Great under pressure, and is so good with her clients. I love watching her in action,” she says, smiling at me across the table.

“I mean, you did such great work for our wedding, so I’m not surprised at all,” Andrew says.

“Thank you,” I say to them, unsure as to why this is hitting me so emotionally.

Jason squeezes my thigh gently, leaning down to kiss my forehead. I look up at him, and I see so much adoration in his eyes that I could simply burst.

What I don’t expect, however, is for Lennie to screech. “ YOU’RE GETTING MARRIED !”

And then for my own daughter to respond, also screeching, “ I KNEW IT!”

My face turns the brightest shade of red I think it’s ever been, and I squeeze my eyes shut in embarrassment. There’s a hushed laughter at the table, and I don’t know what to do.

I open my eyes, and Jason reaches to clasp my hand in his. “Girls, we talked about this. We’re not getting married.”

I look over to Marley, cringing internally as I hope she isn’t upset that I might be taking over her special moment, but all I see is a giant smile and laughter in her eyes. My worries about upstaging her go away and I let out a deep sigh.

“But you kissed my mom,” Presley counters, pointing at me. “And she’s all red! You’re getting married! You said people who are in love get married, and she’s definitely in love.”

“Presley, quiet down please,” I say, trying to get her to lower her octaves. “We’re not getting married.”

I look to Jason for guidance, and he’s still looking at me with those chocolate brown eyes full of love.

“No, we’re not getting married. We are together, though.

We are dating,” he announces, and the table lights up in cheers and congratulations.

I can’t help but be overwhelmed by the complete outpouring of love.

Jason continues, “It’s still new, and we are figuring things out, but I guess the cat’s out of the bag.” He wraps an arm around me, pulling me into his embrace.

He’s so different when he’s not fighting his feelings, though I guess I am too. It’s much easier to fall for him than fight the connection between us. I can take a full breath and sink into the possibilities the future might hold.