Page 50 of Beautifully Broken

Ava Rose

“Just when I think our dates can’t get any better, you go and top the last. You’re so thoughtful, and that lunch is one I’ll never forget.” Disbelief flows through my voice, even after having the drive home from Golden Gate Park to process it.

“You have me trying to outdo myself every time with those adorable doe eyes and dimples on full display.” Braiden’s hand laces with mine, leaning me back against the front door of my house.

“Outdoing yourself is one way to put it.” The lunch spread of my favorite childhood foods took thought and time. My mother left out no details when he secretly asked, and Braiden perfected everything, down to the Nutella and strawberry sandwiches in the shape of stars.

“It’s important to nurture our inner child. You might be twenty, but that little girl is still inside you.”

He doesn’t know those food choices happened from age nine and onward. I was adopted by the ER nurse who saved me from the traumatic hellhole of my foster home, and her billionaire hotel heir husband has been the father I always wanted.

Brushing a strand of hair behind my ear, he adds, “Little Ava Rose made you who you are today.”

I love you nearly falls from my lips, and though we’ve known each other from swim for years, being in the same friend circle, we’ve only been dating for three months.

It’s too soon.

“I’m so grateful to have you in my life.” My arms lift and comfortably rest around his shoulders. Lifting onto my toes, my mouth presses to his .

“I’m grateful for you too,” he says against my lips before pulling back to look at me.

“You did well with the crowd at swim this morning, but I know it was crazy.” Of course I’d go to support him.

He’s got one Olympic gold to his name and is training hard for a second.

“I thought the picnic date would be less stimulating for you.”

“I’ll overstimulate myself to support you any time.” And it’s true. He might be the social one, but I’ll deal with any crowd for his events.

He grins and gives me a light tap on the ass. “I should get going so you can read one of your romance books and relax.”

“Who needs a book when I’ve got my very own top-tier boyfriend?” Not wanting him to leave, my lips meet his again, and the way he kisses me back this time has flutters traveling from my stomach all the way down to my toes. Like always, the air disappears as I’m sucked into his spell.

When a sigh escapes me, he kisses down my neck, and I inhale him.

A hint of chlorine forever lingers in his pores, no matter how strong his body wash is, and it’s the hint of familiarity I focus on to keep myself from spiraling.

My knees go weak, melting into him as he makes his way back to my lips to take my breath away all over again.

Reaching behind me, I fumble with the handle to open the front door, wanting to get us inside.

Braiden picks me up, my sundress bunching higher as my legs wrap around him.

“My room,” I whisper against his lips, but he leans my back into the wall as his dick rubs the tingling spot between my legs. Moving with him, my body begs for a release I keep denying him to give me. “Braiden,” I nearly beg.

Our kiss slows before he pulls back with his green eyes staring into mine. My feet hit the ground with my sinking heart until he smirks.

“You sure?” he asks as my hands run over his shoulders, down his thick abs, and wrap around his dick with a gentle squeeze. “Fuck, Ava.” His hips flex as his head drops to look between us.

“I know what I want.” I swallow. “Let me thank you for today.”

“You said thank you.” His tone waivers, and I know what he’s getting at. Giving him pleasure has never been the issue.

“Mmhmm.” My hands unbutton his shorts right there in the entryway, and I’m about to drop to my knees when he fists my hair with a mischievous grin.

Instead, he spins me around. My heart races as a thrill pumps through my veins.

Tilting my neck, he moans in appreciation for better access and places soft kisses from my ear to my shoulder.

I want this to happen so badly.

“I bet your pussy is soaked,” Braiden whispers before nipping my ear. The warmth of the sun comes through the large window as I stare out at the ocean cliff overlooking San Francisco.

“Desperate too.” And she is. I’m twenty years old and want nothing more than to get lost in the moment of our shared pleasure.

Braiden brushes his fingers down my arm before his hand covers mine.

He laces our fingers together, holding our hands positioned over my lower stomach as his dick presses against my back. “Touch me, Braiden.”

Letting go of his hand, I lift my dress over my head, turning around to face him.

He’s seen me in countless bikinis, and we’ve gone this far before, but every time, Braiden looks at me with the same hunger.

The dark gaze beginning at my eyes, then trailing down to my breasts, and the subtle lick of his lips as he pauses at my hips.

His hand squeezes his dick as his eyes travel back up my body, Adam’s apple bobbing as they reconnect with mine.

I never tire of his reactions to me, and I plan to take us as far as I can today after our incredible date.

Picking me up, he carries me to my room, gently laying me on the bed.

And like he can’t get enough, his lips find their rightful place on mine.

This feels good.

I know he can make feel good.

I love making him feel good.

Of course he wants to watch me enjoy the pleasure he has to offer as well. I want that too. When Braiden breaks the kiss to stare into my eyes, it sends my heart to my throat.

“We can stop at any point.” He sounds like a broken record, and most likely doesn’t expect much to happen this time either, but if anyone deserves an A for effort , it’s me.

“Kiss down my body.” I know I’ll enjoy that because his breath hitches every single time I do it to him. His moans fill the room whenever I stroke his dick or take him in my mouth .

“Gladly, Ava.” He’s never once called me out on freezing when his hands wander south. But this time? I need to prove to myself that I can let him make me feel good. If only my insides would stop trembling.

I remove his shirt, revealing his perfectly sculpted body as it hovers over me.

My hands give their praises, tracing his abs and back up to cup his face.

Leaning down, his lips meet my jaw before dragging along my neck.

Waves of excitement roll through me as he peers up between feathered kisses down my abdomen.

A relaxed sigh sinks me deeper into the bed as his hot breath and soft mouth continue exploring my skin.

Slowly, my legs part, inviting him lower. But he doesn’t touch me there. Not yet.

Pure lust glazes over his eyes as he pushes my leg out wider, trailing his lips from the back of my knee and up my thigh.

I want this to happen like my life depends on it.

He has no clue of the truth behind us taking things slower than most couples, and I haven’t gathered the courage to come clean.

I wish I didn’t have to. I wish I could just move on.

“Yes.” A needy cry falls from my lips as he places a wet whisper of a kiss on the sensitive skin of my hip, taking me by surprise. “Keep going.”

“Anything for you, baby.” Braiden watches me intently. My skin is electric, mirroring his desperate need to taste me as much as I want to feel that experience for myself. Each kiss inching closer to my center sends an anticipatory pulse to my clit.

Stopping him will not happen this time.

I’ve made it this far.

I’m okay.

A deep breath fills my lungs as my pelvis arches. My eyes stay glued to his every move as his tongue licks from my wet spot on my panties up to my still-covered clit.

He groans. “So fucking good.” Gently, his lips suction to my clit, and I twitch from the perfect sensation.

“Again. Please, Braiden.”

He smirks before his tongue swipes his bottom lip.

“What Ava Rose wants, Ava Rose gets.” His tongue increases pressure, and my skin burns with the need of knowing how his tongue would feel against my bare pussy.

He continues taking his time building me up–– or he’s waiting for consent to remove my panties.

My eyes flutter shut as I grind against him.

Braiden wants me to feel as good as I make him feel.

But how good?

For how long?

Suddenly, his hands hold my hips steady, locking me in place, unable to move. Fuck, no no no. I should have been clearer about this. Tears prickle my eyes and bile churns my stomach. Any ounce of pleasure morphs into a skin-crawling sensation that makes me want to escape my own body.

“No, please no!” My heels dig into the bed, pulling myself away from him as if his tongue is a tool of torture.

I mean to say in my head, but it’s a broken rasp of fear cutting through our beautiful moment.

Sitting up, my cheek wedges between my molars as I steady my breathing.

Humiliation and anger overwhelm me, and I begin to spiral, blinking back tears.

Braiden jumps back to the edge of the bed, concern and guilt dancing over his handsome face.

“Did I do something to hurt you? Is it too sensitive? I promise, I only wanted to make you feel good, Ava.” My heart cracks, watching him blame himself, and I can only shake my head.

“No. No, you did everything right. I just….” My lips roll between my teeth as I hold my breath, trying to figure out what to say. “I’m so sorry.”

“Don’t you dare apologize.” His hands cradle my face, quieting my world.

“Jumping to oral before ever even using my fingers was my fault.” There he goes, being perfect, not wanting an ounce of guilt to be put on me.

“One step at a time, lovebug. How you choose to share your body is something I value too. It’s okay if you’re not ready to go this far.

” That’s a typical assumption, but also embarrassing.

“If we need to stick to kissing, then so be it.”

I don’t deserve him.

“I feel bad that––”

“Don’t worry about my physical needs. I need you for more than an orgasm. Sex would only add to the connection, but it’s nothing to rush.”

We’ve been dating for three damn months and have been friends for years… I know he used to drown in pussy, and the fact that he’s gone this long without it has built my trust and faith in him .

“It… It’s not.” His eyes fall to my chest, watching my breathing pick up.

“Hey, look at me, lovebug.” His fingers tilt my chin to make eye contact. “I still want you, more than anything. Please believe me.”

I think I nod, feeling my eyes water, desperately wanting to spill my past.

“I thought I was ready for everything, Braiden.”

From his concerned expression, it’s clear he wants to ask further questions, considering I’m vibrating with fear beside him. I can’t get myself to open up right now.

“You better get going to practice.” I give him a tight smile to encourage him. He lingers, not wanting to leave me in this state. “I’m going to take shower and relax out back with my book.” Leaning over, I give him a gentle kiss while running my hands down his arms. “I’m fine, okay?”

“Okay.” If he doesn’t believe me, he fakes it well. Braiden cups my face as his thumbs brush over the apples of my cheeks. “Thanks for joining me for lunch, Ava.” He kisses my forehead before seeing himself out.

My therapist is right; she can only take me so far. It’s time for me to take charge of owning my past and trust that I have the right man by my side to share it with.