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I couldn't tell Tyler. Not yet. Something within me was so scared of his reaction. I'd been basically hiding out at Tayler's while he was home, unable to even look him in the face. My excuses were starting to fail. Tayler and Alex were encouraging me to tell him before they did. It was a fight with myself every night over what I was going to do.

Finally, I decided. I couldn't keep it from him any longer. I left Tayler's with heavy footsteps. Everything was so out of place. I'd always imagined doing this with cute balloons and happiness. Instead, there was terror and heavy dread in my heart. The fear of Tyler's negative reaction was strong. What if he hated me? What if I screwed up his career? What if he blamed me? Would he even want to keep it? I couldn't imagine a scenario where this went well. This wasn't how things were supposed to go. We'd already talked about this so many times before.

My hands were shaking by the time I was unlocking the apartment door. I shut the door behind me loudly. I could hear music blasting from the bedroom. As I set my keys on the island, the sound paused. Tyler appeared, grinning. His look of happiness immediately disappeared when he saw how I was leaning on the counter.

"Hey, what's wrong?" I wanted to melt at the compassion in his voice. I pointed weakly at the chairs.

"Can you sit please? We need to talk." His face changed into a hundred different emotions at once. He sat cautiously. I couldn't look across at him. I was too scared that I would start to cry. I sucked in a shaky breath and tapped my nail against the cool stone. I gathered all my courage and squeezed my eyes shut.

"Ty. I'm pregnant." When I didn't get a response right away, my lip quivered. "And I know this is shitty timing and you didn't want this and we're too young and I get that you're going to hate me because I ruined your life but please don't make get rid of it becau—" I had my hands pressed against my chest in a desperate last attempt to stop the sobs. I tried to take deep breaths but the panic was winning.

Tyler cut me off. Not with his words, but with his actions. He pushed away from the island and was at my side in a second. One hand found the back of my neck, supporting my head. The other squeezed against my back, pressing me into his chest. I sucked in a breath before letting out a choked sob. I buried my face into his shoulder, needing the comfort so desperately. He held me until I'd relaxed enough to talk.

I pulled back, tears still lingering in my eyes. There was so much passion in his face that it almost hurt to look at.

"Why would you ever think that I would hate you? Especially over this." I blubbered out an incoherent response. He pushed my hair away from my tear stained cheeks. His thumbs brushed under my eyes to catch the tears. "And it's not going to ruin my life. It's going to make it so incredibly amazing that I won't be able to imagine my life without it." My lip quivered again, tears threatening to spill.

"So you're not mad?"

"Of course I'm not! Halle, this is the last thing I'd ever be mad about. You had me worried that you were running away with some Cubs player or something." His lame attempt at a joke made me smile slightly.

"No it's not that good."

"Hey!" His smile dropped slightly. "But...how? I thought you were taking birth control?" I shrugged.

"I was. I didn't miss a single day. But it's only ninety nine percent affective. So I guess I fall into that one percent that gets through."

"It's destiny. Have you been to the doctor already?" I fumbled in my pocket for the ultrasound pictures I'd received a week and a half before. I put them in Tyler's hand. His face changed into complete wonder.

"Wow." His voice was soft and so relieving to hear. "Wow. You're that far along that you got an ultrasound?" He looked confused.

"Six weeks now. Guessing it happened a bit before Christmas." A lot clicked into place for him.

"You can't go to All Star week."

"Ty, I'm not an invalid now. I'll be fine." He looked hesitant. "Besides, you said yourself that the press would be all over this. I've already thought about it...I don't think we should tell anyone. Obviously your teammates, but make them sign a waiver or something. I was actually going to delete my social media...just in case fans get suspicious and start commenting."

"But that means hiding away from the world for nine months. Can you do that?"

"I can wear baggy stuff to class until the semester ends. I won't be due until September so I can get away with school...but I don't know what I'm going to do after that. I guess we can figure it out."

"What about team stuff? Games and everything? There's fans everywhere."

"I can go until it's too obvious. I guess." The reality of how much we'd have to do in order to stay private was daunting. I was willing to do it for the sake of Tyler's career. I rubbed my face. Tyler's hands gently took ahold of my waist.

"Shit just got real, huh? We're not just two dumb kids anymore. We're gonna be parents." I leaned into him.

"I'm scared."

"There's no reason to be. You're gonna be the best mom out there." I groaned.

"Oh god. What do I tell my parents? I'm jeopardizing my last year of school. What if I can't graduate. What will they say?"

"Maybe wait a bit on that one. We can wait a little. When I tell the team...should I actually have them sign waivers?" I shrugged.

"Depends on how much you want to protect your image. You know people will be all over you for losing focus if they find out."

"Lots of guys have done it."

"Not everyone has as much on the line as you." I gently reminded him. "And not everyone has the same media pressure. Which is why it might be a good idea for you to delete yours." I was surprised when he nodded.

"No waivers. I trust the boys. But social media...I agree. I've been meaning to for awhile anyway. That's gonna cause a stir in itself." I shrugged.

"Everything you do does. Did you know that you have whole fan pages? And there's an account that posts about all of us girls on the regular. I question how those accounts find pictures sometimes." I shook my head.

"All the more reason to stay off. That means not taking pictures with Tayler and everyone else."

"Well I can. Just headshots. Boobs up." He smirked at me.

"If you must."

"Have to show off my awesome locks and stunning makeup some way." Tyler leaned down to kiss the space between my eyebrows.

"Do you know how hot you're going to be? And the few people that do get to see you will know that you're mine."

"A ring would've had the same effect." I gently poked at his side. Tyler twisted away from my acrylic nail.

"I suppose that's a must too."

"Whenever you want. No rush." He gave me a look.

"What? I'm serious. Don't run off and get a ring just because of this. Do it when the time is right."

"Fine. But if you must know, the ring isn't a problem. It's a question of when." My eyes widened.

"Oh?"

"Actually already had a time planned out...but it depends on how you pregnant you want to be for the occasion."

"Six months or less, please." His eyes lit up.

"Perfect." I blushed at the idea. He held up a hand for me to take. "Please come snuggle with me I feel deprived." I let him lead me into the bedroom. As I settled into the bed, Tyler pulled me close to him.

"You're not going to be able to do this much longer."

"One month at a time babe." I thought he'd fallen asleep, but he spoke again. "We should get a dog." I wrinkled my nose.

"No thanks. Baby first. Dog in a year or more."

"Fine. I'll agree to that if you let me pick names."

"Uh, no way. You'll end up naming the kid 'Tom Brady Dewalt' or something."

"Wow you guessed it exactly. How'd you do that?"

"I'm about to be the mother of your child. I think I know you more than you know yourself. And I was thinking something like...Hunter."

"I like that." He murmured as he nuzzled his face into my neck. I couldn't hold back my giggle as he pressed light kisses against me. "I'm leaving tomorrow at lunch time for practice. I'm going to wait to tell the guys. Probably until you definitely start showing."

"Ok. Whatever you want." I was starting to get sleepy. My adrenaline had worn off. The effect of recent crying made my eyes puffy and heavy. I didn't bother to keep them open. Tyler said something else, but I was already gone.

When I woke back up, it was to Tyler kicking the covers off. From the lights in the kitchen streaming through the doorway, I could make out how he'd bolted upright and shoved his face in his hands. I was confused. It was still pitch black out.

"What's wrong Ty?" He didn't respond to my sleepy question. I began to wake up more. "Ty?"

"Just go back to sleep. It'll go away." I couldn't quite pick apart the tone to his voice.

"Please tell me what's wrong. I can't sleep if you don't."

"I'm not ready. What if I get stupid and walk out like my dad? I can't do that to you." I let out a sigh. I sat up, placing a hand on the center of his back. Gently, I began to rub circles.

"You're not your dad. You weren't raised that way. You'll be an amazing father."

"But I don't know how to be a dad. I don't know what to do."

"You had father figures. Coaches. Teammates. Now your uncles. You were never completely alone. You'll be a natural." Tyler let out a sigh and fell backwards.

"What if I'm not? What if I screw up?" My words obviously weren't working.

"Then we'll work on it together. As a team. Because that's how we do things. Right?" He finally nodded. I shifted so that I was laying with my head on his chest. "I love you Ty. Goodnight."

Sleep came just as easy this time. I didn't wake up again until my alarm went off. Blinking blearily, I was surprised to find Tyler still in bed. I smacked at his arm to wake him up.

"Ty it's ten thirty. You're gonna be late."

"Ah, shit." He let out a groan.

I watched him as he rolled out of bed. He hastily pulled on a pair of sweatpants and a sweatshirt. He disappeared into the bathroom for a short while to brush his teeth and comb out his hair. Before he left the bedroom for good, he rushed to the bed to kiss me passionately.

"I love you, baby mama. Be safe while I'm not home. I'll see you later, ok? Have fun at the game." I nodded. When he was gone, I fell back in bed. I'd forgotten about the game that night. Home against the San Jose Sharks. I'd have to text Tayler about meeting her there. I was too lazy to send her a message now.

I was content to lay in bed for the rest of the day and reflect on the past twenty four hours of my life. Somehow, Tyler hadn't freaked out. I'd expected more of the middle-of-the-night reaction at first. Of course he would have those kinds of fears. It was why he'd been so hesitant other times we'd talked about the possibility.

I decided to give one particular person a text. Someone who'd be able to help figure out what to do and how to handle it. Someone who'd been through this before in a similar way.

Kiki Crawford was a woman I admired. Not only had she put up with the hockey life for years, but she'd been in this same situation. A kid before she'd even been engaged to Corey. Of course, by now she was a wife and a mother to two. But her situation had been similar. Minus the age. I'd talked to her at Jon's wedding, and occasionally texted her over the season so far. Now, I was in desperate need of advice. I doubted she would be able to meet up today, but I wanted to set some plans out.

I smiled. That had been easy. I turned my attention to Tayler. I'd promised to call her last night and tell her how it went. That obviously hadn't gone to plan. I tapped on her contact icon so I could FaceTime her. She picked up immediately.

"Oh thank god. I thought something bad happened. I was about to rush over there myself." She paused. "So...good or bad."

"Good. Like...heart wrenching relieving good."

"Oh I'm so happy for you! I told you he'd be fine."

"Yeah there's some catches. We're both disabling social media for awhile and we're not telling anyone publicly. Ty will tell the team in a few months or whenever I start showing. I don't know if I should tell the rest of the girls. I want to...but I don't want to risk things. I'm really worried about the perception of this on Ty's end." I chewed my lip. Tayler waved her hand.

"Hockey players have families. It's not unusual. They can't judge you for that."

"I know but...not this young. Not when it's only his third season and anything could happen. What if he gets traded but he's already settled down here with a family? Anything is possible."

"Halle, you'll be fine. I promise. You guys are literally perfect. Nothing bad is going to happen. If you want to keep it low key, that's fine. A lot of people do. Everyone will get it." I let out a sigh.

"How the hell am I supposed to tell my parents? I haven't even graduated yet. I'm literally due right when classes start. There's no damn way I can do classes and raise a kid. Even if I got babysitters or something."

"Could you take a gap year? Don't some people do that?"

"I guess. God I'm so scared about telling my parents. How long should I wait? How long is too long?"

"You could wait until the team knows. I think it might be best to do it in person though. When would you get that chance?"

"I don't know. All Star is next week and I told Ty I would go but now I'm regretting that. I don't feel like flying anymore. Look at me. Six weeks in and I'm grumpy."

"You should get together with Lynds now. You two are actually super close. Like, your kids will grow up as best friends."

"That'd be cute." I rubbed my forehead. "This still doesn't feel real. I've got seven months ahead of me and I'm not prepared at all. There's so much to plan and so much to do." I groaned. "A baby room. Furniture and toys and dishes and diapers. I'm literally clueless."

"That's what baby showers are for. And don't worry, we'll throw you a bangin' one in the summer." I let out another curse.

"Ah, shit Tay. I already ordered the bridesmaid dress. I'm going to need a new one but maternity. Great."

"Oh I didn't think of that. I think the store has returns. Hopefully. If not you can probably resell for a decent amount."

"I hope so. Can I come over later to get ready for the game?"

"Of course. Lynds and Lex will be here. Dabbling with the idea to invite Hannah."

"Oh you wouldn't." Tayler's grin was wicked.

"Dunno. She's growing on me."

"Stopp she'll hear you." If there was anything I couldn't stand more than Kirby lately, it was his girlfriend. Having to put up with her at games was rough enough. I couldn't imagine the extra stress of outside events.

My distaste for her was shared. We would've been accepting of the girl wasn't so damn rude all the time. She didn't hold back with snide comments or putting people down. It was a toxic trait that our group was better off without. Especially when she tried to hit on players that weren't Kirby. Particularly Tyler and Dylan. Tayler would joke about her, but the vicious dislike between them was poisonous.

I wasn't nearly as bothered. Tyler wasn't afraid to be stiff at times. Dylan was more relaxed, leaving all the sting to his girlfriend. I was glad Tyler could take care of himself without being affected. It made my life easier by not having to constantly battle her off.

Tayler snapped her fingers. The sound jarred me back to reality.

"Hello? I asked what you're wearing tonight."

"Oh. Sorry. Sweatshirt then the jersey. Get used to layers. I'll be trying to hide a bump for a long time."

"But you don't have one now."

"I know. I just feel self conscious. I know I don't have one but I feel physically inclined to touch or hide my stomach because I think it's obvious. The more layers I wear, the safer I feel."

"Gotcha. I'll bet you five dollars one of the wives notices tonight. They're like hawks. They'll pick you out. Pun intended." She smirked at me.

"No way. It can't be that obvious."

"Halle I literally picked it up when you didn't even know yet. You're not good at lying or hiding things. They're totally gonna catch on."

"Ok, well if I do anything obvious you be my guard dog. Ok?"

"Sure thing. See ya later girly." She saluted me before hanging up. I settled back into the thick comforter the was layered over the bed.

How does one practice not being pregnant?