Page 19
Story: witness
halle
"I've played at the professional level and announced for years and I still haven't seen a single forward who can feed perfect passes like that. Especially for a defenseman. It's like he knows where his teammates are without having to look. We thought we had that chemistry in Toronto with Marner and Matthews, but this kid is a whole level ahead. It's like he's in the heads of his teammates."
My knees were drawn up to my chest in the seat of the Uber. Adam sat across from him, enthusiastically talking to the driver about the game that was blasting from the radio right now. Turns out our designated driver was a massive Blackhawks fan. What's the luck? Now I was stuck listening to Tyler's name being blasted from the radio for more than an hour. Adam didn't seem to mind. In fact, he was just as chipper as if he'd been playing with the team right now. I did suppose you had to be excited when your team was winning.
Two goals and the Hawks were on top. And Tyler was involved in both of them. That's what Adam was talking about now. How involved the center was and how it benefited the team. I didn't care. Talking about Tyler only made my nerves stand on edge. I was absolutely terrified of what would happen later. My fear was making me exhausted. Paranoia came with that tiredness. The only thing I could do was curl up and stare out the window. Watching the skyline and city lights flash by this time was different. I wasn't the same naive and excited girl. I was older and I was tired. That sounded so extreme. It was only a few months later, not years. I still felt like I'd aged a millennium.
After the second period ended, with a score of two to one, Adam settled down a little. Still not enough to stop talking about playing hockey. He still hadn't told the driver that he was a member of the team. It was entertaining to see him dance around the truth carefully. If only the driver knew the reality.
Finally, we pulled into the apartment block. It was a new place, a lot fancier and in a nicer section of the city. Adam noticed how I was staring up in awe at the beautiful complex.
"He gets a nice contract and moves in here, eh?" Adam was grinning at me. "I'm still stuck with stinky Nilly while Kirbs and Walter get the nicest penthouse. I'll tell ya Kirby spends a good chunk of his salary on this. Walty's is barely even scratched." I looked up again at the glass infrastructure. We were really in downtown Chicago now. The apartment I'd been to before had been in a more relaxed and suburban area of the city. I almost missed the relaxed housing arrangement.
Adam tried to help me lug my things from the car, but he was limited with only one arm. The other was in a sling to prevent further injury. I didn't have much. One carry-on bag and one suitcase. I could manage the bags on my own. Adam led me past the lobby, nodding at a woman sitting at a desk. I had to guess he came around here often. We went through a tall hallway until we reached the elevator. Adam smiled again.
"You'll see how high up he is. It's pretty cool. Close to the water, too." I frowned slightly. Adam was talking like he didn't know a single thing about what had happened. Like Tyler and I were still a thing and he was trying to convince me to move here. I opened my mouth to explain the truth, but something stopped me. Adam's pure innocence didn't deserve to get spoiled.
We traveled up the flights, until we'd reached the top of the shorter building. It was nine stories, and apparently Tyler's apartment was on the top floor. As soon as the elevator doors open, I felt the true meaning of Adam's words. This hallway was luxurious compared to the ones below. It wasn't long, and had two ornate doors on either side. Adam explained quickly.
"Tyler lives on the right. Patrick Sharp and his family live on the left, actually. You know who Sharpy is?"
"Uh...I've heard the name...don't know who he is or what he looks like though."
"Ah. He played here for awhile, won the Stanley Cups with the team. Retired in 2018. Now he does some announcing and podcasts." I nodded, remembering. Adam lead me to the right hand door, producing a key from his pocket. "He doesn't normally give me a key...you're lucky. I usually have to knock and wait ten minutes for someone to wake up. If they don't get up then I have to call them. Annoying, that's what they are." I smiled when he laughed. I wasn't in the mood for the humor Adam was trying to convey.
He opened the door wide, letting me through first. I let out a gasp as I took in the foyer area for the first time. It was massive, fully furnished. The difference in this apartment to the last one was drastic. I could tell the furniture was pre-existing. No offense to Kirby and Tyler, but neither of them had the best style. Especially when it came to interior decorating. This set-up was professional.
"I don't know where Tyler is letting you stay...I personally wouldn't mind the couch. It's comfortable. Crashed there plenty of times after parties."
"Parties?"
"Oh, yeah. Tons of them. Usually Kirby and I go with some of the other guys. Tyler never really went. Said it wasn't his thing." I relaxed slightly. For some reason, the thought of Tyler partying, getting drunk, and possibly going home with a girl was all too much for me. I still felt a strange protectiveness over the boy who wasn't even mine.
I continued to admire the apartment as I walked through it. We went by two bathrooms, a bedroom, the kitchen, and then the final bedroom before reaching the living room. Adam wasn't wrong about the couch. It was similar to the old one they'd had, but bigger. I hadn't thought that notion was possible. The TV looked the same. I sat my things by the bedroom door, digging out a charger. Adam was already settled with the remote in his hand when I turned around. He flipped it on. I wasn't surprised to find that the channel was already on the local sports network. It was still the second intermission.
A sigh escaped me as I settled onto the couch next to Adam. I needed to talk to him. I couldn't hold off the information anymore.
"What do I say to him?" Adam turned to look at me.
"I'm not good at this stuff. This relationship...it's all Kirby and Ty. Not me. I can't involve myself."
So he did know. I nodded. I understood. How could I involve him without feeling guilty? I wouldn't. It wasn't right. He didn't deserve it.
I settled into a comfortable silence as the game resumed. My heart fluttered whenever Tyler's name was mentioned. I ignored the palpitations, scrolling through my phone for a distraction. Adam watched the game on the edge of the couch while I sat back and fought off sleep.
It was only ten when the game ended. Based on previous game nights, I knew it would be at least another two hours before Tyler returned home. I asked Adam about the routine now.
"What do you guys do after a game? Why does it take Tyler until like...midnight or one to get back?"
"Coach talks to us for a bit, then some of us have interviews. We always do a post-game workout to cool our muscles and organs down. Sometimes we meet fans, sometimes go out to eat. The time really adds up. You wouldn't think so, but once you're in it everything goes by really quick."
"What do you think they'll do tonight?" Adam looked wistful.
"It's a Friday...so probably out to eat. And Ty...it depends if he wants to rush back here or put things off."
"I'm not sure which one I would prefer." My voice was lowered. Adam shrugged, yawning. "You can go, if you want." He adamantly shook his head.
"No way. Cap told me I had to stay right here and make sure you're safe. Told me if I leave you alone I get my...I get in trouble." His grin was aloof. I shook my head, trying to hide my own smile.
"You listen to him off the ice?"
"Of course. When the Holy One talks, you listen. Especially when it's about the girl he never shuts up about." I gave him a weird look.
"Never shuts up about, eh?"
"I don't know what happened between you two and Kirbs, but Kirby was pretty damn stupid to think he could compete with what Tyler feels about you. He is absolutely head over heels for you."
"Oh, do tell me more." I was intrigued, and my words were only half-joking. Adam mimed zipping his mouth shut.
"No more. That's enough from me." I sighed, annoyed. Call me selfish, but I wanted to hear everything I'd missed especially when it came to Tyler.
Adam returned to the TV, looking through the channels before settling on a rerun of an NFL game. I watched the game with him until my exhaustion caught up. Adam tossed me a blanket from his side of the couch, along with a pillow. With the comfortable and soft items, I started to doze off. My eyes blinked sleepily as I watched the steady points of light outside the balcony. The skyline was beautiful. In my tired state, a hazy, sparkly dream was spun from the tall buildings. I fell asleep with the sound of football plays and the images of dark buildings stretching far over my head. My last thought before I succumbed to the dark abyss of an unconscious state was I want to live in this apartment with Tyler for the rest of my life.
&&&
I didn't wake up for hours. At least, it felt like hours. When my eyes finally fluttered open, I felt well-rested. Every ounce of sleep disappeared from my eyes almost immediately when I noticed a figure sitting at the end of the couch. It wasn't Adam and his happy-go-lucky presence. It was Tyler. I started, jumping into a sitting position. He looked at me, a gentle smile crossing his face.
"Morning Halle." I didn't know what to say. I just gasped at him stupidly.
"You didn't wake me up last night?"
"Nope. You and Adam were quite comfortable and snoring too loud to bother." His amusement was obvious. I blushed.
"Where did Adam go?"
"Back to his apartment. I kicked him out an hour ago."
"Oh. Ok. Can you tell him I said thank you?"
"I will." Tyler stood, stretching. "Come on. I got you breakfast." I struggled to my feet. My legs were pins and needles from sleeping in a weird position. It would take awhile to get the blood flowing again. The sound of food was too tempting to stay in one spot and let them gradually wake up.
Tyler stopped in the kitchen. There was a big white bag on the table. I approached it while Tyler got something out of the fridge. I took a seat, and was promptly confronted with a large iced coffee.
"Iced blonde vanilla latte for you. The bag has some bakery stuff from a place a few blocks from here." I looked up at him in awe.
"You remembered what coffee I get?"
"Of course I did. You only made me buy it for you every morning at the beach." I smiled and took a sip of the cold liquid.
"Thanks, Ty." Somehow, things weren't awkward. They were normal. Like I'd just woken up in Tyler's apartment as his girlfriend, and he'd gone out to get me breakfast to surprise me. I didn't want this blissful moment to end.
But of course, things never last. As I was opening a box of fresh muffins, Kirby walked in. He froze immediately. His face twisted strangely. After a second, he spoke to Tyler.
"Well damn, Ty. Thanks for letting me know we'd have a visitor." I, too, turned to look at Tyler.
"You didn't tell him I was coming." Tyler's face was stony.
"Didn't get the chance."
"Of course you didn't." Kirby looked annoyed. I didn't blame him. I watched as he turned and walked out of the kitchen.
"Nice, Ty." I wasn't angry. Just tired. Tired of Tyler never doing the right thing. I'm sure my vague annoyance was evident from my tone. He let out a sigh and slid into the chair across from me.
"I'm sorry. I could say that a million times and it would never makes things right." I started to protest slightly. He cut me off. "I'm not wrong. We both know it...I guess we have a lot more to talk about regarding everything." I crossed my arms and leaned back.
"Yep. We do." He looked nervous.
"Do you want to do it here? Right now?" I took a deep sip of the iced drink.
"I'm not going anywhere." He sighed, rubbing his face with one hand. I held up a finger before he could start talking. "But me first. I have a lot of things that I need to say."
"Ok. Go ahead."
"First of all, I was hurt and I felt betrayed when you adamantly refused to tell me anything about your past. I just wanted to help you and you hurt me. I know I shouldn't have pushed you as much, but the right answer was not to walk out on me and leave. That was a dick move." I let out a heavy sigh. "And I know we were both wrong. I'll admit that fully, and I'm sorry. And I won't expect you to tell me everything now, but I need to know you trust me and you are ready for this. I'm worth more than sitting around as someone who isn't trusted and valued like I should be. And as much as I know I shouldn't, I will consider giving you a third chance. If I hear what I like." Tyler waited for me to continue. I was out of words for the time being. "I'm done." I murmured quietly. Tyler let out a heavy sigh.
"I have a lot of things to apologize for, then. I was stupid, and I should have let you know I trusted you. I did trust you...it's just that I wanted to protect myself and how you see me. I didn't want you to think lesser of me because of where I come from." I made a face. That would never happen. "Like before when I was an idiot, I just wanted to focus on hockey. I didn't realize or accept that I couldn't survive without you."
"You've done it so far." His smile was melancholy.
"Barely." My heart gave a jump at how sad the word was. "I want to be seen and perceived as this indestructible player who won't and can't be bothered by anything. I don't want to be looked at as weak or too emotional. It was so hard..." Tyler's eyes gained a far-off look. I had a heavy feeling about what I was about to hear. "I didn't have an easy childhood. Dirtbag parents. Dad got thrown into jail when I was one, and when he got out he never bothered to come back to my mom and I. My mom wasn't much better. For a bit of my childhood, she sold drugs out of our house. She moved away from that when I was five, around the time she threw me into hockey lessons. I was always that kid who showed up to school in the same clothes as the previous day, with worn down sneakers that were a size too small. The only thing that kept me going was hockey. My mom dumped me off at the rink at three every day, and didn't pick me up until eight or later. The only thing I could do with that was skate. I used discarded equipment, since we couldn't afford our own. And when I was old enough to walk or ride the bus to the rink on my own, I did. I spent hours and hours and hours on the ice. There was one guy, this one coach, that helped me out the most. He taught me how to control my emotions on the ice, how to channel my anger at my situation into playing. He trained me like a machine, from the ground up. By the time I was eleven, my mom had basically disappeared from my life. I basically lived alone, learning to cook and do chores for myself. Through that coach, I got sponsors who bought me equipment, paid for me to get on elite teams and go to major tourneys. And when I was eighteen, I signed my own contracts and got the hell out of there. All without my mom. She wasn't there for me for years. I didn't need her then, and I don't need her now."
Tyler's face was fierce. I couldn't say anything. How did I respond to a testimony like that? I couldn't, not without treading on toes. Tyler's anger disappeared as soon as it had arrived. He let out another sigh.
"Well that's half of it. That's me. Does it help?" It did. Everything about Tyler's passion had clicked into place. His fear of the media and not succeeding. Wanting to please everyone. Tyler was a puzzle, and I'd finally found all the edge pieces and clicked them into place. I knew I'd only scratched the surface on the mystery of his being, but there was plenty of time to find out the rest.
I stood, walking to him. I'm sure he wasn't expecting my arms to wrap around him. With one hand, I held his head to my chest. My head dropped to whisper something into his hair.
"Thank you, Ty."
Table of Contents
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- Page 19 (Reading here)
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