Page 17 of Ties of Starlight (Tethered Hearts #2)

I donea wasn't Idonea. Well, she was , but she was also Inga, the murderess.

And the other past five girls who had been Gytha's chosen.

Nyrunn stood by his steed, waiting for Idonea—whoever that really was—to exit their tent. He held her bag tightly with one hand.

If…

Stars.

If this was true, the consequences were staggering.

It meant that Idonea had killed two people. She'd been killed. By his uncle.

By alchemists.

By Moon Elves.

She'd been drowned, poisoned—Nyrunn pushed down the bile rising in his throat remembering what he’d learned the Moon Elves had done to Gytha's chosen when they'd kidnapped her hundreds of years before. Those despicable, unspeakable acts all done to his wife.

His wife who had spent six previous lifetimes married to another man.

Then she came out of the tent. The other side of the bond sparked as he turned to face her. The haunted terror in her eyes was new for someone who had seen so much. And directed at him. Like out of all her lives and all the horrific things she had endured, he was somehow the thing that scared her the most.

The husband she wasn't supposed to be married to.

She hurried to mount her steed, glancing at him. He didn’t move to help her mount. The servant holding her reins gave her a boost. Once she was up, he gave her a nod and urged his horse on to their party, waiting for them. He could tell she was trying to keep anything from slipping through the bond, but without a wall, pieces were still slipping through. If her anxiety was choking him, he could only imagine what it was doing to her.

What was it the Constella had said about the bond? It wasn’t just an involuntary exchange.

He paused, focusing on the hum, staring down at the lines on his arm. Last night, when she was in his arms, the love he had for her swelled in his chest so much he ached trying to hold it back and failed. When he focused on that memory, the feeling returned and he pushed it into the bond.

Warmth. Safety.

Love.

In response, the anxiety quieted.

Idonea was staring down at her saddle, her hair in her face, but he could see her cheeks had turned pink even as her brow furrowed.

He quickly took his place at the front of the group, leading the way and dismissing Frode, telling him to ride with Lady Asa. He also sent the guards to ride farther ahead as their scouts so no one could overhear.

After a few seconds, Idonea rode up to his side, and her knuckles were stark white as she gripped her reins. Anxiety started climbing up his throat again.

He took a deep breath. “Olaug. You mentioned him. He was Olvir? How do you know?”

Idonea's voice was so soft he almost couldn't hear it above their horses plodding along the road out of the ruins. “Because it always is. It's him. I know him. Every time, I know him.”

“How?”

“He's my soulmate.” Idonea looked at the bag that was now on his horse, containing her journals and the letter her so-called soulmate had left. “I don't know how else to explain it.”

“Try.”

The word came out more guttural than he intended and Idonea winced. Nyrunn silently kicked himself, but he could not soothe the burning pain that had gone through him as she said ‘soulmate.’ He was only inviting more agony, but he was never going to get answers if Idonea couldn’t talk about Olaug.

Idonea sighed. “It's like... Every time I meet him in a new life, it's there. This feeling in the back of my head. I've been looking for something, for someone, and then it's right there. Everything in me says, 'That's him. The one we know. We found him.'“

Nyrunn's stomach rolled.

How could any elf compete with that?

“So when do you know this isn't the first…” Just saying it felt insane. “That it’s not the first life you've lived? Do you meet him and remember?”

“No.” She ran her thumb over her reins, staring at it to avoid his gaze. “Sometimes I know before we meet, sometimes after. The first few times it wasn't until after the wedding. The last few times, years before we're selected as the Cometa Couple.”

“Olaug, when does he realize it?”

“Sometimes, never. Always after me, if ever. Usually after the wedding.”

Nyrunn made a note of that. Why Idonea? Why was she the one remembering?

“So, how did this happen? You're not the first. You’re not Gytha. You're not even part of the first couple after Gytha and Agnarr. If you're on seven now, that means there were several cycles before you that you didn't live through.”

Idonea still wasn’t looking him in the eyes. “During my first life, I think something happened during the rituals, probably at the Constellation Pool since we always come back tied to the comet's next appearance. I think our souls are bound together and to the comet until we get it right.”

While this was still absolutely insane, it was starting to explain a lot.

About the last two weeks. About the last few years. About everything since he’d laid eyes on her that first day in the library.

“So... has this ever happened before?”

She finally looked up at him. “Have you ever happened before?”

He nodded.

“No.” Idonea’s voice was soft, but direct. “Every time something goes wrong, even if we manage to get to the end, but never have I married anyone who wasn't Olaug.”

“So... I'm what went wrong then?”

Her eyes doubled in size. “No!”

She then looked back over her shoulder to see everyone else was still far enough back not to be able to hear. She turned to him again, lowering her voice, and the spike of panic eased. “I mean, you're a result. I must have done something in this life, or it's a consequence of what I did in the last. He may not remember, but he can feel it. It explains the letter. He could tell there was something wrong with me.”

Nyrunn couldn't help the noise he made in the back of his throat. Idonea shot him a confused look, and he swallowed his words. To be fair, his protests were based on his feelings for...

He was far out of his depth. Had he actually had any feelings for Idonea or just who he thought she was? Could he have truly loved someone so complex, only having just barely scraped the surface? Really, what had he known about her when he’d decided he loved her? A few years that didn’t even come close to one seventh of the total lives she’d led? The mask she wore to hide the six other women she’d been?

She was as deep as the ocean and as vast as the night sky.

She was a killer.

“So… what does this mean?”

Idonea shrugged. “I guess now we figure that out.”

Nyrunn fell silent. That was... more than enough for the moment.

Idonea took a deep breath, nodded, and faced ahead again.

He watched her out of the corner of his eye.

Soulmate.

She'd called the cad who said absolutely vile things about her and left her at the altar her soulmate.

Still.

Of course she did. Olaug wasn't someone she had been in love with a few years. He was the one she'd loved all her life. In every life.

Although Nyrunn himself could not fathom how someone could say such despicable things about their own soulmate and then run off, not to mention the number of times he'd cheated on her.

He was a bump on the road.

The latest obstacle.

What hope did he have of competing with the love of all her lives?