Page 37 of The Wish

Max follows Alex to the kitchen and out the back door where they walk around the garden, taking in the early morning, refreshing and soothing after a long night at the screens.

Wandering back into his living room, Alex blinks as the first bright rays of the new day break through the window.

Wincing, Alex closes the curtains, making the room dark.

Staggering to the sofa, he lies down and falls asleep.

Max sighs. Breakfast will be late. He curls up next to Alex and falls asleep too.

The sound of rain and Max slobbering on his face wakes Alex some hours later.

Wiping his face with his T-shirt, he slowly rises and staggers to the kitchen.

After a long look in the fridge reveals nothing for either him or Max to eat, he takes the dog crackers from the bench and pours a decent amount into Max’s bowl.

He contemplates eating one himself before adding it to the bowl.

In a cupboard he finds a packet of potato crisps.

Screwing up his face at the taste, he continues to eat them, carrying the packet into the bathroom, where, placing it on the vanity he fills his mouth while stripping off and getting into the shower.

He watches as Max joins him in the bathroom, reaches up to the vanity and knocks the packet onto the floor, manipulating it to empty the contents out, swiftly hoovering up the rest of Alex’s breakfast.

Dressed, Alex looks at his razor, runs his hands over his stubble and decides no, not today.

There are more important things to do, and he and Max go back to his office.

For several hours he manipulates scenes, videos and photos.

Glancing at the clock on his desk, he grabs his leather jacket, helmet and heads to the garage.

Opening the garage door, he notices it is still raining.

Sighing, he guns the engine and pulls out on to the street.

Having previously noticed staff at the hospital leaving through a back entrance to go to the staff car park, Alex positions his bike to observe the end of the day for non-shift workers.

The rain falling makes it difficult for him to identify the staff members, as many of them immediately raise umbrellas, blocking his view of their faces.

Finally, he sees her. Kelly. She has no umbrella and accepts the offer from a colleague to share hers.

He watches as she breaks away from her colleague and runs to her car.

As she drives out of the car park, he pulls in behind her and follows.

The rain and peak hour evening traffic make their journey slow.

Alex worries that Kelly will become suspicious of his bike remaining on her tail, but she shows no sign of being aware he is there.

Finally, she pulls into a small apartment building.

Parking, she runs through the rain and inside.

Stopping beside her car Alex is concerned her apartment might be on the other side of the building: then he won’t know which is hers.

His patience is rewarded when he sees a light come on in an apartment on the third floor and recognises Kelly closing the curtains to the weather outside.

Entering her bedroom Kelly throws her jacket onto the bed.

With one hand she unbuttons her blouse, with the other a clip is pulled from her hair which drops around her shoulders.

Shaking it free, she smooths the wayward bits down.

Her blouse is replaced by a sweat top and before she can switch out her skirt, she hears the knock on her door.

Pausing, she waits to see if a second knock comes, wondering if she’s heard something that isn’t there. The second knock follows.

Opening her door, Kelly is shocked to see an unshaven, dripping wet Alex.

‘How did . . .’

‘I followed you from the hospital.’

‘You what?’

‘I’m sorry, but I need to talk to you.’

‘OK, but what is wrong with my office?’

‘Can I come in?’

Kelly makes no move to let him in or move away from the small gap in the door her body is blocking.

‘Alex, why are you here?’ She fights to keep her tone neutral, professional.

Alex looks down at his wet clothes, boots, notices the puddle of water he is making on the floor.

He suddenly has no idea why he is here. He was acting on an impulse.

Exhaustion and hunger hit him like a sledgehammer, and he realises he’s swaying on the spot.

She might think he’s been drinking. He fights to pull himself together.

‘You said you would help me,’ is all he can manage to stammer out.

‘With what in particular?’

‘Jesse,’ is all he can say.

‘Alex, you look terrible, now what’s going on? You need help with what, Jesse’s wish?’

‘No, no, I’ve got a friend, he’s helping, well, he’s not really a friend, he’s a colleague, well, he might be a friend, I’m not sure. It’s, it’s . . .’

‘Alex, what do you want from me?’

Struggling to hold it together; frustration, anger at Jesse’s situation bubble up as Alex continues to stammer.

‘You said you’d help me get through this, make it easier for me, but you haven’t done a damn thing.

I’m busting my gut here, I’ve spent hours at the hospital, your hospital, because you needed me, or so I thought.

I’ve met this amazing girl who is going to die, and I don’t know how to deal with that, I don’t know how to deal with you.

I’m probably going to lose my job but that’s OK, I don’t care about that.

But what do I do when she’s gone? How do I make sense of what I’ve been through? I just want a bit of help, that’s all.’

A neighbour appears at the top of the stairs and walks towards them, concerned with what he is seeing. ‘Hi, Kelly, make it home before the rain set in?’

Kelly forces a smile to allay the worry she sees in her neighbour. ‘Hi, Andy. No, I copped it, but it seems to be coming down even harder now.’

Andy turns to Alex. ‘Sorry, didn’t mean to interrupt. See you, Kelly.’

‘See you, Andy,’ Kelly says back.

Alex watches the neighbour disappear into a nearby door. Not looking at Kelly he walks away, leaving Kelly standing in her doorway, uncertain what to do.

Walking slowly back out into the car park through the rain, Alex sits on his bike, staring up at the lights in Kelly’s apartment.

Putting his helmet on, he slowly drives through the car park to the street.

Something catches his eye in his side mirror.

A wet, bedraggled Kelly is running towards him.

Clicking his stand into place in one motion he steps off his bike, takes his helmet off, placing it on the seat.

Swiftly he unzips and removes his jacket.

As Kelly reaches him, he wraps her in his jacket, holding her close.

Kelly looks up at him.

‘I’m sorry, I’m so sorry but I didn’t know what to say, I wasn’t expecting to see you. You have to understand, my home is where I get away from my work, where I can pretend Jesse and the others don’t exist and I do that so well, the pretending. I have to, don’t you see?’

Tears now mingle with the rain running down her face.

‘But I should’ve helped you. I shouldn’t have been so hostile at the beginning, and I should’ve prepared you better, told you that you would fall for Jesse, like we all have. I’m so sorry, Alex.’

Alex attempts to wipe her tears away, chuckling at the futility of it as the heavy rain runs down her face.

Letting her go, he straddles his bike. Then, placing his helmet on Kelly’s head, he encourages her to sit in front of him, nestled between his legs.

Holding tight, he slowly drives to the front of her apartment building.

They walk up the stairs, his arm around her, her head resting on his shoulder. Walking her to her open door, he takes his jacket from her. Pushing her hair away from her face, wiping it with the back of his hand, he smiles.

‘I know I’ve broken every rule in the book coming here tonight, but can I ask you a favour?’

‘You can ask,’ Kelly replies with a smile.

‘I want your help with what I’ve done so far, I need you to see what I’m doing to make sure I’m doing the right thing.’

‘Of course I’ll help you.’

‘Ah, it means going to my home where all my equipment is. I can’t pack it up easily.’

‘You’re asking me to come to your place?’

‘Yes.’

‘Then you better give me your address. Let me clean up and I’ll be there.’

Kelly opens her apartment door and takes a step inside. ‘I’ll see you soon,’ she says.

She watches him walk away and disappear down the stairs.

Closing her door she runs to the window, opening the curtains a crack to wait for him to appear and get on his bike.

She feels genuine disappointment when he doesn’t look up at her.

As he pulls away, he raises his right arm in a wave, as if he knows she’s watching him leave.