Page 20 of The Wish
Kelly shifts uncomfortably – maybe it’s time that she announces her presence.
‘I thought the last one you showed me was the most beautiful thing I’ve ever read. This is, well, it’s your mum and your relationship in the most beautiful words,’ Amy says, wiping a tear away.
‘I showed Alex the other one.’
‘You what? You let him read a poem your mum wrote about her love for you?’
‘Well, yeah, what with him losing his mum so young, I thought maybe he might like to read what mine writes.’
‘Or get totally freaked out and upset. I don’t think that was such a good idea, Jesse.’
‘What’s not a good idea?’ Kelly says, full of smiles as she joins the girls at Amy’s bed.
Jesse quickly grabs the poem from Amy’s hands.
‘Hi, Kelly, nothing, we were just talking,’ Jesse hurriedly says.
‘It’s OK, girls your age should have secrets. I get it. But, Jesse, can I talk to you a minute?’
‘Sure.’
‘Can we go into another room?’
‘No, you can say anything in front of Amy, she’s my best friend, you know.’ Jesse gives Amy a wink. ‘What’s up?’
Feeling cornered, Kelly shuffles her feet before beginning. ‘It’s about Alex . . .’
‘What about him?’ Jesse interrupts.
‘Well, he won’t be back, I’m afraid, we’re going to have to rethink your wish . . .’
‘What did you say to him?’ Jesse demands.
‘I just told him he couldn’t see you anymore, but Jesse—’
Clambering from the bed, Jesse stands, hands on hips, glaring at Kelly, fire in her eyes.
‘I knew you didn’t like him. This is all your fault, Kelly. He could do it; I really believe he could do it and you’ve sent him away!’
Taken aback, all Kelly can do is stammer. ‘I . . . it’s not like that, Jesse, it’s your father who’s objecting—’
‘I know that but all you had to do was convince Dad that Alex could make my wish, how hard did you try? Or maybe convince Alex to do it without my dad knowing, at least in the beginning.’
‘I know this isn’t what you want to hear, Jesse, but I have to respect your parents’ wishes.’
‘But you don’t seem to respect my wish!’ she snaps. ‘I want you to leave now!’
Kelly has never seen Jesse like this – perhaps, she thinks, she’s underestimated the teen’s determination. ‘I’ll come back in a bit and maybe we can discuss this more, once you’ve had a think about it. See if there is a wish we can do that everyone is in agreement with.’
‘It’s just my dad who doesn’t want this,’ Jesse mutters. ‘And you, apparently.’
Kelly takes a deep breath. ‘I’ll come back soon,’ she says, ‘we’ll sort something out. I promise.’
But Jesse has turned away from her, her back shaking. Amy comes over, flashes an accusatory look at Kelly, and gives Jesse a hug.
Kelly heads for Sandy’s office, knocking and entering without waiting for an answer. Dropping into a chair opposite Sandy’s desk she waits while Sandy finishes writing in a patient’s record. A pile of similar records in front of her, waiting for her attention, are pushed aside.
‘How did it go?’ Sandy asks sympathetically.
‘Not well, to say the least. First Alex tells me it’s my fault, and Jesse now thinks the same.
They both say I should have done more to make it happen and keep Dean out of the way.
But I can’t do that, can I? It feels wrong to go against Dean like this.
And Alex . . .’ She turns her head away, her brain buzzing.
‘What about Alex?’ Sandy prompts.
‘Oh, I don’t know.’ Kelly shifts in her seat, she can’t get comfortable. Her clothes feel too restrictive. ‘He’s so prickly. He’s hard to pin down.’
‘Well . . .’ Sandy looks like she was about to say something but thought better of it.
Kelly looks up sharply. ‘What?’
Sandy leans back in her seat. ‘Just that you could have been nicer to him. Made him feel welcome on the ward, offered to run interference with Dean, been supportive of Jesse’s wish, helped—’
‘Hey, slow down. I came in here looking for comfort.’
‘Kelly, listen to me. It’s not just me saying this. Othershave noticed too. We’re worried about you. Is everything all right?’
‘I’m fine, it’s just this guy rattles me, I don’t know what it is about him, he just . . .’
‘Represents what you and Dean can’t face: Jesse running out of options.’ Sandy looks into her friend’s eyes with deep concern. ‘Kelly, do you think you’ve become too attached to Jesse?’
‘No!’ Kelly rubs her forehead. ‘Yes . . . Maybe. I don’t know.’
‘Don’t take this the wrong way, Kelly. Would it be better if one of your colleagues could step in with Jesse and navigate her wish? I have to say – I am worried that Jesse’s wish is becoming too much of a focus.’
Kelly’s stomach lurches. She knows what’s at stake.
Passing this on to someone else feels like a cop-out, an abdication of her responsibilities.
But perhaps Sandy is right: she hasn’t been putting Jesse’s needs first and foremost. ‘No, that’s not necessary, Sandy.
I want, no, I need to sort this out and see it through.
I owe it to Jesse. I’ll make sure not to let my personal feelings get in the way anymore. ’
Sandy nods. ‘OK. I’m here if you need me. You can always run anything past me first. Remember, you can’t do everything on your own. Sometimes you’re going to have to give up control.’
Kelly understands this, but it’s hard. She’s always been independent, always made her own way in the world, without the help of her family. She says goodbye to Sandy and heads out the door. Determined that whatever she does, she must find a way to make Jesse’s wish come true.
She picks up the phone and dials a number. ‘Hi, Mandy, it’s Kelly. As you know, Dean is making the staff stop Alex from seeing Jesse. I need your help to make sure she gets her wish.’