Page 33 of The Missus

‘What are you watching?’ Keira asked, kicking her shoes off, sliding her feet up on the coffee table. She wanted to feel normal again. Her brief time with Kelly had left a bad taste in her mouth.

‘It’s about a serial killer in the seventies,’ Alanna told her.

Keira’s eyes widened. ‘Unless they caught him, I’m going to bed right now.’

‘Don’t worry, they did,’ Alanna assured her. ‘I fancy a cup of tea. You want one?’

‘Yeah, why not?’

Keira watched Alanna making tea in the kitchen and thought about what Kelly had been trying to make happen. Relationships. What a joke. Keira would never concede to something like that.

Alanna came in and handed her a cup of tea. Keira settled back on the sofa, directing her eyes at the TV as Alanna sat down next to her.No, not me. Lone wolf for life.

‘Biscuit?’ Alanna asked, holding out a packet of Jaffa’s.

‘Go on then,’ Keira said, taking a biscuit.

Fifteen

It was clear to Alanna that Julie was not in a good place today. The hat said it all. A great big beanie pulled down over her ears.

‘I think everyone thinks I’ve got cancer,’ Julie announced.

‘Has anyone said that?’ Alanna asked.

‘No. But a woman hiding all her hair—or lack of it—under a hat? It’s just where your mind goes, isn’t it?’ Julie posited reasonably.

‘Would you prefer people to think that?’

‘Honestly, yes,’ Julie said. ‘It’s a lot less embarrassing.’ She sighed. ‘It’s warm in here. Do you mind if I just…’ She pointed at the hat.

‘Of course, Julie. Please go ahead.’

Julie pulled her hat off. She was sporting a lot of bald patches, a result of trichotillomania, a compulsive need to pull out hair. The disorder was having a serious flare-up because Julie was having problems at work. She was a biomedical scientist.

‘Last week, we talked about possibly going back on your meds. Have you given that any thought?’ Alanna asked.

‘I don’t want to. I mean, I can’t be on it forever, can I? Just so I can have hair? It’s a weird trade-off.’

‘That’s up to you. But it could certainly ease your symptoms. As a scientist, I’ve got a feeling you know that better than I do.’

‘Can’t we just figure out what’s wrong with me here? I mean, isn’t that what I come to you for? I’m pursuing non-medical avenues. But I can’t do that if you keep banging on about meds.’

‘Well, OCD is complicated. It’s sometimes best to have it treated by a combination of—’

‘Look, why don’t we just cut to the chase?’ Julie exclaimed. ‘It’s the thoughts that you’re gonna wanna hear about.’

Alanna paused. ‘The intrusive thoughts?’

‘Yes.’ Julie chewed her lip. ‘The other day, I thought about hurting my boss.’

Alanna nodded. ‘I wouldn’t be too hard on yourself about that. I think it’s pretty common to—’

‘I imagined knocking every single one of her teeth in with my stapler and then stapling her mouth shut so she had to swallow them.’ Julie looked at Alanna boldly. ‘How about that, eh?’

If Julie expected Alanna to be shocked, she was going to be disappointed. Alanna had heard worse. ‘How did you feel about that?’

‘How did I feel about that? That’s all you’ve got?’ Julie demanded.