Page 34 of The Breaking Pointe

isn’t it strange

NOELLE

Listening to the ringing on the phone, I impatiently wait for Steven to pick up the line”

Please pick up,”

I manifest, whis- pering as I stand at a crosswalk light, staring at the street sign.

Colton’s is only a few blocks away. I could just go.

“Hello? Noelle?”

Steven says into the phone, interrupting my thoughts.

“Steven!”

I say, worked up”

Have you talked to your brother? In the last day? I saw him the day before yesterday. I don’t know if he does it to other girls, but being ghosted for a day really sucks,”

I tell him, hurrying to cross the street.

“Uh—no, I haven’t heard from him. I doubt he’s doing anything crazy, Noelle. Sleeping at the most. Or maybe the gym,”

he says, chuckling.

“The gym for an entire day?”

I exclaim, then pause.

It’s gotta be more. I’m worried this time. This time feels bad, and I’m not gonna let it go until I figure it out. He’s acting out

of sorts. If I’m being crazy, I’ll take ownership of that—after I find him.

“Never mind, honey. This really isn’t your fault. How’s school?” I ask.

He clears his throat”

Uh, don’t tell Colton?”

he wearily mentions.

“Tell him what?”

I furrow my brows, as if he can see me.

“I don’t know…I’m uncomfortable.” He sighs”

I feel like it might be too much—”

he says, then he rapidly starts speaking to someone else, his voice muffled in the background.

He switches back to me after some words”

Noelle, I have to go. But hopefully you find Cole. I’m sure it’s nothing,” he says”

Okay. Thanks. Just stay in touch, Steven. Things will get

better,”

I respond.

“Right. Later, Elle,”

he says, abruptly hanging up.

I sigh after the line goes silent, dropping my phone from my ear as I begin walking in the direction of Cole’s condo. I’m almost scared to see what I might walk into. Popping up at someone’s home is normally not recommended to do. As paranoid as I am about reactions, I’m taking my chances. I need to ease my conscience and make sure things are okay. I need to make sure he is okay. Then I can relax again. I’ll even leave him alone for as long as he needs.

I walk so fast, it almost becomes a jog—getting me to the front door of his building within minutes. Scurrying into the lobby, I slide past different people until I get to the elevator. Jumping in front of it, I repeatedly press the up button, staring at the doors intensely. My feet do a tiny two-step, clunking my boot heels against the floor as I wait.

When the door opens, a few people flood out, making me step back before running in after it’s empty, and now pounding the

button to his floor and the button to close the doors. I mumble, “C’mon, let’s go, let’s go.”

Out of spite, the doors seem to close slower than ever.

Tapping my feet more, I watch the numbers change as it takes me all the way up, with no interruptions, and step out the second the doors open again. I book it down the hall, turning to walk to his door. My boots halt in front of it, and I ogle at the numbers on his front door, raising my fit to knock. Swaying in place, I sigh, knocking before I can change my mind.

“Colton, it’s me!”

I yell, knocking again.

I grasp the strap of my bag, waiting to hear his footsteps, but nothing happens. Just barking from Bonnie, somewhere inside. I look to each side of me before remembering what condo number is Trey’s, and sway my body to walk that way. I count each door until I get to the one that I’m sure is his. Number 21. Looking the door up and down, I give it the same treatment as Colton’s.

“Trey, it’s Noelle!”

I call out.

I look around, then tighten my coat, waiting and becoming more and more antsy as the seconds tick by.

The door swings open, bearing Trey who is dressed in none other than work out attire, holding a vitamin blender cup.

“Elle. What’s up, girl?”

He smiles”

I need your help,”

I vocalize.

“Is everything okay?”

His tone suddenly changes.

“Colton isn’t answering. He didn’t pick me up yesterday,”

I flail my hands as I speak, “and I’ve called more than enough times, but it goes right to voicemail. I even texted, and the messages won’t deliver. Like his phone has been dead for hours,”

I explain, jamming my words together, hoping it even makes sense.

“Alright, calm down.”

He nods, resting a hand on my shoulder”

You went to his place?”

“He didn’t answer the door. So here I am.”

I hug myself”

It’s okay.”

He nods more and reaches behind the wall,

grabbing his keys. He steps out with me and closes the door behind him”

C’mon,”

he says, leading the way back to Colton’s.

Trying to keep up with him, I almost run into his side as he stops at the door.

He puts a key in the lock, and opens it right up”

I’ve had this key for a while now. Here’s to using it for the first time,”

he says, letting us both in.

“Lock the door behind you,”

he tells me, putting the keys in his pocket.

I follow him inside and shut the door, listening to his direc- tions. Bonnie starts to go nuts, barking profusely once she realizes who we are. She begins jumping around in her cage, crying between each yelp.

I step a step forward to get to her, but I’m stopped by Trey’s arm.

“Watch it. The lamp is shattered.”

He points to what used to be a large, stained glass lamp that is now in a billion pieces.

“Jesus…”

I whisper, pushing it to the side with my boot and stepping over to Bonnie’s cage. I kneel down and unlock the door, opening it for her”

Hi, baby. Where’s your daddy?”

I ask her, petting her as she rams her head into me, wagging her tail like a maniac.

I stand up again, looking around more to see if there’s any more destruction.

“Yo! Cole!”

Trey yells, walking past the kitchen, crunching through assorted glass.

The house is completely silent. Not one noise can be heard

except for us, trudging down the hall.

“Colton?”

I call loudly as Trey goes into his room.

I leave Trey behind and walk further down the hall, seeing a different kind of glass on the floor, trailing outside the bathroom along with droppings of red.

“Please…”

I whisper, creeping towards the bathroom en- trance, stepping on shards as I do. The shards become bigger, and so do the droppings, leading me to a pulverized mirror, its scattered debris in front of the sink. The droppings are pretty much dry—and randomly spread around. So are a multitude of tiny white pills. Some crushed, and some whole. Some are covered with the darkened, red muck.

“Trey, come here—now!”

I call him.

He comes running up behind me, reporting to the scene at max speed.

“Look.”

I point, feeling my throat tighten up.

“Don’t trip out yet,”

he tries to assure me, even though he sounds frightened himself”

Art studio,”

he adds, turning around and rushing there.

I go after him, and he slowly opens the door. A tornado.

That’s what you would think had rolled through the room. Almost every sculpture, portrait, ceramic, piece—all destroyed. Every easel—broken. Everything he had worked for years to create—demolished.

Scanning the room of the mess, we find him sitting against a wall, fast asleep.

I skip over different parts of broken items until I reach him, dropping to my knees. Trey comes behind me, kneeling to his other side.

“Colton,”

I say, cupping his cheek and running a thumb along

more of the red stain. Glancing down at his hands, I find all of the cuts and the culprit for the mess.

His eyelids twitch before tightening as he groans”

Cole, wake up for us, bro,”

Trey says, patting his chest gently.

Colton groans again, bumping my hand as he tries to touch his face, fluttering his eyes open.

“Hi, honey,”

I whisper, blinking some tears away from my eyes, letting them fall down my face.

He looks at both of us, backing away, but being stopped by the wall.

“It’s okay—it’s just us,”

Trey says.

Cole looks at his hands, then us, then behind us, Shock washes over his face.

“W-What did I do?”

His voice cracks.

“Don’t worry about that right now.”

Trey shakes his head”

Yeah, you’re okay. We should get you to bed. You need to

rest more.”

I lightly dust his shoulder before squeezing it”

I’ll get him up,”

Trey says”

Just clear a path for us.”

I nod, standing up and doing as told, as Trey lifts him from the floor and helps him. They both follow my clear path until we exit the room and go to his bedroom. Trey then sits him on the bed, and Colton conforms into a ball, sinking into the mattress like mud.

I drop my bag and struggle to pull my coat sleeves down both arms, hanging it up once I do.

Trey wisps past me, walking out again, making a bit of noise in another room. I unzip my boots, kicking them off and run a hand through my hair as I walk to the bed, crawling into it, beside him. As I do, I pull the blanket folded on the chest at the foot of the bed along with me, placing it over him.

“Okay, have him take this,”

Trey says as he walks back to him,

holding out some pills, a bottle of water, and Nyquil”

What are these?”

I ask, taking the pills into my hand.

“Extras of his anxiety medication. That’s what’s all over the floor in the bathroom.” He sighs”

Can’t say he didn’t try to stop himself, I guess,”

he says, looking at him.

I glance at the pills, then sit up on my knees in the bed”

Cole, are you still awake?”

I softly prod.

“Hm…” he hums.

“I need you to take something for me,” I say.

He weakly rolls over to face me, waiting for me to give him what I have. I hand him the pills and he shoots them back, not even giving me the chance to offer him water. I then take the Nyquil from Trey and hold out the baby cup filled with purple liquid, and he shoots that back, too before quickly rolling back over, returning to his pseudo turtle shell.

I look at Trey, and whisper, “Thank you.”

He says, “Anything for you guys,”

and crosses his arms”

I wish I could stay, but I have to get to work. Call me if you need anything, and let me know how he’s going, yeah?”

I give a nod and stand up”

I’ll walk you out.”

We both leave Cole to lie there and head out toward the front door.

“He should be fine. I think he might have gotten it all out now,”

Trey says, returning to his normal voice now that we’re alone.

“Do you think he’ll be mad at us?”

I ask. Trey half smiles, shaking his head. “No.”

I inhale through my nose, smiling back. “Okay.”

He smiles a little more and reaches his arms around me, hugging me”

Thank you. For taking care of him.”

I close my eyes, sinking into the hug and embracing him back.

“I love him.”

Trey pulls away, looking down at me”

I know.”

He chuckles again, letting me go and turning for the door.

I cross my arms, watching him leaving me behind.

I bite my lip softly, then look at the colorful glass on the floor before walking to the kitchen to grab the broom.

It’s very strange to me, how we can simultaneously be worried about both the present and the future. Neither the future or the present can be stopped. But, you can find a way to rectify the meaning of the present, in a way that doesn’t diminish you. We know how much the present can affect the future. It’s scary. Unpredictable. Time will pass—months or possibly years, and you will have surpassed that difficult moment in time that you once referred to as the future. The cycle continues, and we don’t even realize it. It’s a shame that we all beat ourselves up to an extent that is completely unheard of, all because we lack control of what’s next in this life.

We all do it. But I wish I knew why we did it. We’re just people. We’re only human.

He’s only human.