Page 59 of The Aster Valley Collection, Vol. 2

JULIAN

From the moment that I’d heard Parker and Erin were getting married, I’d fantasized about them calling it off.

But now that it had happened, I hated him for it.

What had started off as simple cold feet had turned into my…

my Parker … walking away from his commitments.

Now the rest of us were going to have to go through the whole process of watching them break up, only for them to decide next month or next week or next year that actually, no, they did want to get married after all, and then we—by which I meant I —would have to somehow find the mental fortitude to endure yet another bachelor party and write another best man toast, wishing the love of my life a lifetime of passion with someone who wasn’t me.

If I’d stopped and thought about it, maybe I would have realized the truth sooner—that Parker had never walked away from a single commitment in his life. That he’d rather walk over hot coals than hurt anyone important to him, especially Erin.

But I didn’t stop and think. I just took all my bitterness and rage and hopeless jealousy and threw it into making him hurt.

Even after I racked him, he had enough self-control to roll me over and pin my wrists to the floor, pressing my thighs down with one of his strong legs. I closed my eyes and reminded myself we were in a fight.

A fight.

“Fuck you,” I spat. “Get off me. I need to go find Erin.”

“She’s not here,” he said in a low voice. “Take a fucking breath.”

“Don’t tell me what to do, asshole.”

He moved my wrists together so he could brush a lock of hair out of my eye with his free hand. “I didn’t do this,” he promised softly. “I didn’t do this.”

I stared into those familiar eyes, eyes that reminded me of the forests near Aster Valley because they captured every shade of green at once, and knew he was telling the truth.

“What happened?” I asked again. This time, reality set in. I remembered Parker worrying last night that Erin had been acting funny. I remembered my sister outside Erin’s room with the same story of cold feet.

“She broke up with me. In a letter.”

“Where is she?” I asked, yanking my wrists out of his grip and pushing him off me so I could go find her and talk some sense into her.

“Denver.”

I got to my feet and froze. “What?”

He nodded without taking his eyes off me. “It’s over, Jules. For real this time.”

All at once, a flood of memories washed in.

Parker spending the night after homecoming and telling me the date had been fine, but he didn’t “like her like that.” Parker calling me from college and telling me Erin had shown up unannounced and begged to go to a drinking party.

He’d laughed and told me it was like corrupting a sister.

Parker calling me from his first year of pro skiing and telling me he didn’t know how to tell Erin he wanted to focus on his career instead of a relationship.

Me calling Parker from grad school to ask why I hadn’t heard from him in weeks and finding out it was because of his guilt over breaking up with her again.

At every turn, he’d been the one to resist their relationship.

So I’d just assumed he’d been the one to end it this time.

I looked around at Erin’s and my parents’ faces of shock, at Hazel and the other bridesmaids, who looked confused, and at the two other groomsmen, who’d made themselves comfortable with a beer at the bar.

“Fuck,” I said.

Parker snorted. “I guess that’s about right.” He tentatively pressed fingers against his jaw where I’d landed the punch.

I batted his hand away and pulled him to his feet, then stepped in closer to investigate the damage.

It was already looking red, and there was a smeared dab of blood from where his lip had split.

I ignored the familiar scent of his cologne.

“Dammit,” I muttered. “I’m sorry. Let’s get some ice on that. ”

“It’s okay.”

“None of this is okay,” I said, turning to the bartender to ask for a bag of ice.

Meanwhile, Erin’s dad stepped up. “What’s going on?”

Before Parker could answer, I beat him to it. “Rod, Erin changed her mind about the wedding.”

“What?” Rod looked between me and Parker before settling on Parker. “Did you talk to her? What did she say? Where is she?”

Parker sighed. “She broke up with me in a letter slipped under my door while I was showering. She wouldn’t take my call, but I texted with her a little. She’s back in Denver already.”

“Did she say why?”

Erin’s mom walked up next to Rod and leaned into his side. He slipped an arm around her and held her close. Hazel’s arms were crossed, and her jaw tightened in a familiar expression of anger and hurt.

Clearly, Erin hadn’t confided in her.

Parker reached for the ice I handed him and held it to his jaw.

“Get one for your hand,” he murmured at me before turning back to Erin’s parents.

“She said she wasn’t ready to settle down and wanted time to…

” He sighed. “I don’t know. Try new things.

Adventures. Something like that. I don’t really remember much after the not getting married part. ”

“What does that mean?” Rod asked.

Parker shot me a pleading look, so I took over. “It means Parker just basically got left at the altar and shouldn’t be the one explaining why. Maybe you should try calling Erin.”

Lorraine didn’t look nearly as surprised as everyone else when she stepped forward to give Parks a hug. “You’re right, sweetie. I’m so sorry, Parker. But maybe this is for the best.”

Rod shook his head. “She’ll come around. Everyone gets nervous before the big day.”

Parker hugged Lorraine back. “I don’t think so.

” His jaw began to wobble, and his eyes filled up.

When Lorraine pulled back, my own mom grabbed Parker to give him comfort.

These two women were the closest things he had to a loving mother, and he loved my dad and Rod like fathers.

Being comforted by the four of them would be both wonderful and excruciating for him.

I grabbed Parker away from my mom’s tight grip and pulled him toward the hotel lobby and out of the bar.

“Mom and Dad, can you please deal with this while I get Parker out of here?” Even though I spoke to my parents, I met my sister’s eyes. She’d know to take over, to get my parents on board with helping calm Rod and Lorraine down and help tell the guests.

Dad nodded. “Of course, son.” He gave me a weak smile. “Take care of him.”

I yanked Parker toward the elevator bank and up to his room, reaching into his jacket pocket for his key card when he seemed to have checked out for the moment.

When I finally got us into the room, he threw his tux jacket onto the bed and then turned and buried his face in my neck, hugging me tighter than he had since the day we’d buried his grandmother.

I held him while he cried, running my hands up and down the crisp cotton of his shirt.

His body was big and warm and solid, and it reminded me how rare it was that I was the one comforting him.

Usually, it was the other way around. He’d always been braver and stronger than I was. He’d always been the steady one.

“Maybe Rod’s right,” I said. “Maybe she’ll come around.”

He shook his head and pulled back, swiping at his face to brush away the evidence of his momentary lapse. “No. She’s not in love with me, Jules. She doesn’t want to settle down. Or to be held back by repressive social constructs.” He rolled his eyes.

I narrowed mine, because something about that wording seemed extremely familiar. “Wait, did she say that? Literally that?”

Parker shrugged and nodded. “She said she and a friend were talking last night, and she realized she wants passion and adventure. She wants to expand her consciousness or something, and find the right…” He blinked at me in realization. “The right life path.”

Both of us muttered at the same time, “ Nolan .”

“I’m going to fucking kill him and bury him where he can’t be found,” I growled, pulling out my phone, though my vision was too hazed with red to even see the screen properly, let alone find his name.

“And then I’m going to go have a talk with Erin about what friendship means, and what fucking commitment means, and how to not be an utter?—”

“No, you’re not,” Parker said.

“No?” I snorted, jabbing blindly at the screen.

“ Ha . Watch me. This is the last time she’s gonna fuck you over, Parker.

Mark my words. Bad enough that she breaks up with you, then begs you to take her back a thousand times.

Now she breaks up with you on your wedding day because she’s taken advice from fucking Nolan, that… that…”

“Charming, fun guy with a unique way of looking at the world?” Parker suggested wryly.

I remembered saying those words the previous night, and an icy wave of guilt and anger swamped me. I’d been such a fool. “You’re right. This is my fault. I brought him here, and he did this, and now I’m going to set it right. I will.”

“You won’t.” Parker grabbed my phone from my hand and shoved it into his back pocket triumphantly, like he didn’t realize that me having to manhandle him to get it out again was only more incentive for me to get it back.

“This isn’t your fault. And it’s not Erin’s fault. It’s not even dumbass Nolan’s fault?—”

“The hell it’s not!”

“It’s my fault, Jules. No, hear me out,” he insisted.

“I was mad, too, at first. Hurt. But the truth is… Erin’s right.

And I should have had the balls to call it off before it landed on her.

I knew we were rushing into things. I knew I wasn’t what she needed.

I should have been strong enough to tell her that. ”

“Not what she needed?” I demanded. “ You , of all people? If intelligent, sexy, ginger Henry Cavill look-alikes with hearts made of pure gold don’t do it for her, what the fuck does she want?”

I didn’t even realize what I was saying until the words were out.

The edge of Parker’s lip tweaked up. “You’re biased. But whatever I’m paying you, double it.”