Page 25

CHAPTER 25

Senna

Jacs paces my office. The team is packing for Hungary for the last race before the summer break.

“Are you sure Antoine confessed to trying to make you crash when you were teenagers?”

I nod.

Connor and I have continued to be professional with each other for the last week. When he sees me, he gives me a head dip or talks with me in a group setting about the car’s performance. It’s for the best, even though my belly is like a fucking tornado every time he’s in my vicinity.

“What are you going to do about Antoine?” Jacs asks before sliding into the seat in front of my desk as I pop an antacid in my mouth.

I lean my chin on my fists. “I don’t know. I can’t trust him. He’s not a team player, and the last months suggest he’ll do it again without caring about consequences.” I rub my forehead with my finger. “Antoine’s dad calls every day asking me when I’ll get rid of Connor. Connor isn’t the problem.”

Well, he’s my problem, but Jacs doesn’t know about the kiss that will never happen again or that I need to protect him.

At his voice outside my office, I close my eyes and fantasise about him walking into my office and pushing me up against the wall, his body between my thighs as his hands undo the buttons of my blouse. “Senna, what is going on with you? Your face is red, and you keep licking your lips.”

I suck in a breath. “I don’t?—”

She turns to the door, and Connor’s eyes catch mine, and for a moment, it’s like the kiss is happening all over again. Heat floods my veins as I imagine his hands brushing my skin.

“Something happen between you two? Is that why you’ve avoided me since our night out?”

“Close the door.”

“He’s acted weird since he came third at Silverstone. I thought that was just what happens with some drivers after a race. I’ve never seen him act so professional.” She squeals in delight. “What happened between you two?”

Connor drops his stare and then looks back up. I nearly fall off my chair when he sucks his lip into his mouth.

“Close the door, Jacs.” My tone has an edge, but her mouth is upturned as she swaggers to the door.

“We’ll have words later, big boy,” she fake-whispers to Connor.

“Jacs, please.”

We’re coming up to the big season break, where no one can work on the cars, do any development work, or touch anything. The drivers usually go away and are surrounded by beautiful groupies, returning at the end of August with tans and models on their arms. Maybe that’s Connor’s plan.

Operational departments like finance continue, so although I’ve got two weeks booked off, I’m not going anywhere.

My phone flashes with a message. It’s from the vet, aka my former fuck buddy, reminding me there’s somewhere I could go. But I won’t. I can’t.

“Okay, something is going on with you. You’ve gone from blushing and grumpy to…well, I’ve no idea, but your brow is so damn furrowed that you’ve got a monobrow. What is going on, and who is that message from?”

“Mr. Vet.”

“Your Australian fuck buddy with all the muscles?” She throws her hands in the air. “The drama! What does he want?”

“He wants me to stay with him for a week during the summer break.” I drop my head, bashing it against the desk. The pain is nothing compared to my distress.

“Are you going? You’d benefit from stress relief. Unless Mr. Vet wants more, because your heart is clearly with a certain bad boy racing driver.”

I lift my head to glare at her. “My heart isn’t anywhere. I might go for a week. It would only be for a change of scenery. Friends without benefits.”

“Do you want to go?”

My breath catches in my throat, and I stare through the glass of my office door to Connor, who is laughing with Jimmy. I drop my head back on my desk.

Jacs starts on at me again. “So Mr. Vet wants you. Connor wants you?—”

“Connor and I can’t be together. We had a drunk kiss, and then he got a call from Niki. It was what I needed to convince me we shouldn’t have kissed. I’m his boss, my dad hates him, and he’s my brother’s best friend. I need to remain professional.” My words are muffled against the desk, but she catches every word.

“And yet, minutes ago, he gave you fuck-me eyes through your doorway, and you blushed. And he’s arranged for food to be delivered to your office every evening to ensure you eat.”

I lift my head, and my eyes pinch as I stare at her. “He did that?”

She nods smugly and puts her hands behind her head. Her chair tips back slightly.

“But—”

Suddenly, my door flies open, and my dad strides in. The season break means everyone panics and must conduct as much business as possible. My phone vibrates again. It’s Mr. Vet. I pop it in my drawer.

Dad’s ears are the colour of beetroot, and I prepare for a rant about a decision I’ve made. I still need to confront him.

“Give me a minute, Jacs. And close the door behind you. Not that it makes a difference, because some people are too rude to knock,” I add. It’s like water on oil with my dad.

Again, I catch Connor’s eye as Jacs leaves my office and closes the door. They can’t be fuck-me eyes.

“What do you want, Dad?”

“You need to treat Antoine better,” Dad huffs.

“Antoine needs to be a better driver,” I retort. “I thought we agreed that I was in charge.”

My reply is half-hearted because I suspect he’s continued to speak to board members behind my back.

“That was when I trusted your decisions.” My dad slams his hands on my desk. The temptation to recoil is strong, but I raise my eyebrow instead. “You’re favouring Connor because why? He’s the reason for your failed driving career and accident.”

“Connor is the better driver. That’s been clear all season.” I don’t add that Antoine is the real reason I crashed as a teenager. Dad won’t listen, and I suspect there’s another reason for his adoration of Antoine.

I bang a fist on my desk to avoid stroking or hiding my scar. It’s not something to be ashamed of. “Is Antoine one of the investors you’re lining up?” My dad’s face doesn’t change. And the truth hits me. “What Ralf said was right. You’re not looking for investors. You’re searching for buyers, and Antoine is one of them. That’s why you’ve been hanging out with Jean. I thought I could trust you. I knew, sure as shit, I shouldn’t trust them.”

My dad refuses to make eye contact. Instead, he continues to huff as he walks across the office to stare out the window.

“You don’t believe in me, do you? Why have you let me run this team if you were going to sell it?”

He turns, and his features soften. “Jumps.” I bristle. “Niki was supposed to run this team before he disappeared. Don’t get me wrong, you’re not doing badly?—”

“I’m doing much better than you did when you ran this place into the ground last year.”

His shoulders hunch, and his face reddens. Shit, I don’t want to give him another heart attack.

“Don’t give me attitude, Senna. I’m selling this team at the end of the season because it’s the right thing to do. It’s right for my health and for this family. Niki disappeared because of his crash. You’re working every hour you can and not having a life. You should be having babies.”

I grab the arms of my chair to prevent from striding over and smacking him in the face.

“I don’t want babies. I want to run this team,” I shout. Everyone outside my office will hear what I just said, including Connor. It’s true I don’t want babies, but that doesn’t mean I don’t want a relationship, which is entirely possible. All the other team bosses have partners.

But the only man I want is the one I can’t date.

My dad collapses in a chair. I can barely keep up with my moods, let alone his. “What is going on, Dad? Where did the baby thing come from?”

He sighs and holds his hands up. “Your mum has told me that I must walk away from the team before it’s too late. But I don’t want to watch you get hurt again. After your accident, I thought about how to protect you, which included keeping Connor away from you.”

My jaw tightens. “Antoine was responsible for the crash. He and some other lads were trying to hurt me, and Connor was saving me from them.”

“By crashing into you? Don’t be ridiculous. What they were doing was tactical, a bit of roughhousing to make you drive better. Connor hurt you. If not for him, I’m not sure where you’d be, but it wouldn’t be here. I know racing was important to you, but it was a bit of fun for you, not a career, unlike Niki.”

I throw my head back and grunt.

“Don’t be so dramatic, Senna. You’re a team boss now.”

“Exactly. And I have another half of the season to prove to you and every other fucker out there?—”

“Language.”

I fist my hands as my rage threatens to overwhelm me.

“I can swear in my office. You always did.” I quickly continue before he says something about girlie tantrums or petulant children. “Give me until the end of the season. Niki trusted me with this team, so you should, too. Have you spoken to Mum about it?”

“Your mum sings your praises. She doesn’t know I’m considering selling it. I’ll tell her when I’m ready. We don’t need any more theatrics.”

I shouldn’t have to beg my dad to believe in me, but I have my entire life. Begging him to let me drive, race, and join the company as a marketing intern. Why can’t I say this to him?

“Please let me show you what I can do, and if we’re in the top six in the Constructor’s Championship, don’t sell it, okay?”

His shoulders slump. “Fine. You win. For now.”

I’ve promised something I’m not sure I can deliver.

“And about Antoine,” I add. My dad’s shoulders tighten again, and I ready myself for another fight. “I don’t like the guy. He takes things too far, shows me no respect, and is a misogynistic bastard. I’m used to some of that in this industry, but it’s a risk to the team, and I don’t care what you say about the crash; he caused it.” And lied to me about Connor.

My dad leans forward, pinning me with his stare. “Where is this going?”

“I reserve the right to make any decisions about him I need to make as the boss. I don’t care if you’re keeping him and his dad sweet so you can sell to him. I need to know you’ve got my back if I have to make a difficult decision.” My nerves have jangled about Antoine for most of the season, but they continue to escalate. “Have you got my back, Dad?”

A knock sounds at my door.

“It’s your mum,” Dad grumbles.

I shout to her to enter, and she rushes in, kissing me on my forehead. “Hello, darling. I’d stay and chat, but your dad has a hospital appointment.”

“Just a check-up,” my dad snaps before I can ask if I should be worried.

“I saw Connor outside answering your assistant’s phone. Your team really do support you. Millionaire drivers acting as secretaries—whatever next?” she says, sensing tension and smashing it out of the room, like she’s always done. She doesn’t get enough credit for the successful parts of Dad’s career. “It would be lovely to see you when you get a break. There’s always a pasta dish ready for you.” She scans the papers littering my desk as my mobile buzzes from my drawer.

I hug her tightly. “Yes, Mum. I’ll visit when I can.”

As Dad approaches the door, he turns. “Any news from Niki?”

I shake my head. “He’s not called me recently.”

“Okay. Hopefully, he’ll come back to us. I miss him.”

“Me too,” I reply. “And Dad, about Antoine—have you got my back?”

“Just don’t do anything rash, and don’t let Connor get in the way of this team’s future.”

My mum waves as she pushes Dad out the door.

Before I can contemplate anything else, Jimmy rushes into the room. “A couple of things.” He reels off messages, but one catches my attention. “And your vet friend called because he wasn’t sure you were getting his texts.”

Jimmy tips his head as he tries to read the note. “Sorry, I can’t read Connor’s writing.”

“Connor took the message?”

“Yeah. I was in the bathroom. It says, ‘Please tell her I’m looking forward to seeing Tiger in August,’ and there’s a number and a drawing of a bat or something.”

Shit. Connor thinks I’m staying with Mr. Vet in the break. I examine the piece of paper. It’s not a bat but a badly drawn cock and balls. Childish Connor used to scrawl those on Niki’s notebooks when they were in a mood with each other and he wanted to call him a dick but couldn’t because they were giving each other the silent treatment. My head drops on my desk for the umpteenth time that day.

“Is that all?” I mumble.

“Yes.” He walks out, pausing at the door. I can sense it even with my head on my desk.

“What now, Jimmy?” I sigh.

“As you’re away with your ‘Mr. Biceps Bigger Than His Head Vet’—Connor’s words”—I bite the inside of my mouth so hard that I taste blood—“I’ve asked Connor to catsit while I’m on holiday. He’s staying in his beach house for the summer break.”

Jimmy walks out.

My phone vibrates loudly from my drawer. As if life weren’t complicated enough with the Antoine issue, having to be in the top six by the end of the season, and dealing with the memory of Connor’s kiss.

With all my thoughts snapping at once, one seed of hope remains. Connor isn’t going on holiday to surround himself with models during the break.

I can’t be with him, though, especially after Dad’s parting words.