Page 8 of Semper Fi

“Alas. Another heartbreak, but I’ll persevere.”

Jim chuckled. “But really, out here you aren’t going to meet anyone.”

“I don’t want to meet any women,” Cal muttered as he went back to the branch, hacking into it forcefully.

“You’re thirty now. Not getting any younger.” Jim kept his tone jocular.

“Oh, this handsome face will still be reeling ’em in for years to come, don’t worry.” He finished cutting through the branch with a flourish.

“I just hate to see you missing out.”

Cal climbed up a few rungs and went to work on pruning another branch. He didn’t meet Jim’s gaze. “I’m not missing out on anything. I’m exactly where I want to be. ”

“But you’ll make a great father, Cal. And you wouldn’t believe how wonderful it is to have children. Until Sophie was born, I didn’t know I could love another person that much.”

“What about your wife?” As soon as the words left his mouth, Cal blanched. “I’m sorry. God. Forget I said that.”

The ever-present guilt churned Jim’s gut and dried his throat, but he kept his expression neutral. “Of course I loved Ann. She was a good woman.”

“Absolutely.” Cal ran a hand through his hair. “Geez, I’m sorry. I think I just woke up on the wrong side of the bed. Don’t listen to me. What the hell do I know about any of this stuff anyway?”

With his good looks and gift of gab, women had always flocked to Cal, but since Jim had known him, Cal had never kept a lady around for long. As they went back to work, Jim wondered if Cal had ever been in love.

***

“Pass the carrots.”

Jim shot Sophie a reproachful look. “Pass the carrots, please .”

She appeared ready to roll her eyes, and Jim’s grip on his fork tightened. He didn’t want to send her to bed without supper, but he’d had enough of her backtalk and attitude the past several months. Cal’s arrival had unfortunately made it worse.

But she apparently thought better of an eye roll and grudgingly muttered, “Pass the carrots please.”

Cal handed the dish over. “Here you go.” He smiled, but Sophie kept her eyes downcast.

They sat at the round table in the kitchen. Jim’s father had only used the dining room for special occasions, and Jim had kept up the tradition.

“This roast is delicious,” Cal said.

“Mommy’s was better.” Sophie was clearly intent on disagreeing with everything Cal said, no matter how innocuous .

Before Jim could interject, Cal answered. “I’m sure your mom’s cooking was really good. Say, how was school today?”

Sophie peered at him suspiciously before hitching her shoulders. “Okay.”

“Just okay? You told me you got an A on your math test.” Jim smiled at her encouragingly.

“Wow, that’s great! I sure never got an A in math,” Cal said.

“Why? Are you stupid?”

Jim dropped his fork with a clatter. “Sophie Elizabeth Bennett. Apologize to Uncle Cal.”

“I was just asking a question,” she muttered.

Exhaling heavily through his nose, Jim counted to three in his head. “I’m going to take my belt off in a minute. You apologize. Now.”

Tears shone in Sophie’s eyes. “I’m sorry,” she mumbled.

“Now put your plate on the counter, go to your room, and get ready for bed.”

Her wooden chair scraping on the linoleum, Sophie did as she was told, her little footsteps quick on the stairs as she raced to her room. Adam, aware that something was wrong, sat on his padded chair with wide eyes, mashed potatoes dribbling down his chin.

Jim reached over and swiped at Adam’s face with his napkin, giving his son a smile. “It’s okay.”

“She’s just acting out, Jim. Don’t worry—I can take it.” Cal chuckled awkwardly. “Not many women I can’t win over in the end.”

“It’s not okay. Lord in heaven, I barely know my own daughter. She’d have never acted like this before…” Jim trailed off. Ann was gone, and there was no bringing her back. He was on his own.

“She lost her mother. Just give her some time. She’ll come around.” Cal patted Jim’s shoulder.

No, he wasn’t on his own, and Jim felt a wave of profound gratitude. “I’m sure you’re right. Although in the meantime she won’t be speaking to you or anyone else with that kind of sass. You’ll tell me if she does when I’m not around, all right? ”

Cal raised an eyebrow. “So you can take your belt to her? I have to say, I can’t picture mild-mannered Jim Bennett worked up into such a rage.”

“Well, the truth is I’ve only spanked her twice and never used my belt. But she’s trying my patience and I don’t want to spoil her. My father wouldn’t hesitate when I was misbehaving. Didn’t yours ever punish you?”

“Oh, he punished me. But his weapon of choice was a highly effective combination of concise verbal denunciation followed by a prolonged shunning that would make the Amish weep. But my nannies were damn skilled with the belt, let me tell you.” Cal glanced at Adam, who was occupied with licking gravy from his fingers. “Darn skilled, I should say.”

Jim smiled. “Good thing you didn’t pick up the rest of the bad language we heard in the Corps.” His smile faded and he pushed his plate away.

“Go talk to her.”

“I have to get Adam cleaned up after he finishes his dinner.”

“I’ve got it covered. Adam and I are old friends by now. Right, pal?” Cal ruffled Adam’s hair, garnering a grin.

“If you’re sure?”

“I insist.” Cal took Adam’s spoon and scooped up a bite of potatoes.

They were both laughing as Jim went upstairs, and he felt a bloom of warmth in his chest.

The door to Sophie’s dark room stood ajar. Inside, she was curled toward the wall on her bed, the blankets pulled up tightly. Jim could tell from the way she was breathing that she was awake. He sat on the side of the bed and caressed her dark curls. “I know things haven’t been easy for you.”

She sniffled.

“A lot of things have changed, sweetheart. It’s hard for everyone.”

Sophie turned over. “I want Mommy to come back.”

Her tearstained face and sorrowful expression was like a stab in the gut. Jim swallowed thickly. “I know, baby. But she’s in heaven now. And there’s nothing we can do to change that. Your grandmother died when I was only a boy. I know it’s hard. We just have to do the best we can without her.”

“I’m trying.”

“I know you are. But you’re being very rude to Uncle Cal. He came here to help us, and I want you to treat him nicely. He hasn’t done anything wrong.”

She pouted. “I don’t like him.”

“Why not?” The last person Jim knew who had disliked Cal this much was cranky old DI Tyrell. “Hasn’t he been nice to you since he arrived? Didn’t he bring you a pretty dolly?”

“I don’t want it.” She huffed, eyes skittering over to the corner of the room where the doll laid face down as if being punished.

“Uncle Cal just wants to be your friend. And I know for a fact that he’s a darn good friend to have. I wouldn’t be here if it wasn’t for him. So try and be nice. At the very least, you’re going to be polite.”

Sophie’s brow furrowed as she tensed. “Why wouldn’t you be here?”

Images swam behind his eyes, and for a moment Jim could taste the blood in his mouth and smell the burning flesh. He swallowed hard. “It doesn’t matter now. All that matters is that we’re all here together, and we need to get along. Will you promise to be a good girl?”

Nodding, her eyes filled again. “I’m sorry, Daddy. Please don’t be mad at me.” She sat up and threw her little arms around him.

“I’m not mad anymore. I know you miss Mommy a lot. I miss her too.”

Sophie’s reply was muffled. “Do you?”

Jim’s heart skipped a beat. “Of course I do. Why would you ask that?”

“Because.”

“Because why? Come on, look at me. It’s okay. I want you to tell me.”

“Because you and Mommy never seemed to like each other very much.”

Jim focused on speaking evenly. “Why would you think that? We didn’t argue.”

“But you hardly ever smiled at each other. Not the way you smile at me, or Adam. Or him .”

“Sophie, your mother and I loved each other very much.” It was the truth. He had loved her, even if he hadn’t loved her enough. “Now go to sleep.”

“You’ll always love me, won’t you? Even if I’m bad?”

His chest constricted and Jim held her close, rocking her gently. “Always.”