Page 48 of Semper Fi

He listened to the dial tone until it began beeping and returned the phone to its cradle. After stubbing out his cigarette and pouring himself a finger of whiskey, he picked up the phone again. On the fourth ring, a breathless voice answered.

“Hello, this is Clover Grove. Sophie speaking.”

Cal smiled, and the burn of the whiskey disappeared into gentle warmth. “Hi, Sophie.” It had only been five days since he’d seen her on his weekly visit to the orchard, but he missed her so damn much.

“Uncle Cal?” She squealed. “I missed you!”

“Me too, kiddo. How’s your shoulder? ”

“Lots better. Dr. O’Brien says I can take the sling off soon.”

“That’s great. How’s everything else going?”

“Good. The harvest is starting, so there are lots of people around to help pick. Daddy’s really busy. He’s tired. I wish you were here every day.”

“I wish I was too.” Worry mingled with the residual guilt from his conversation with his mother. “Your daddy’s okay, isn’t he? He’s not sick or anything?”

There was a pause. “Not sick. Just sad the way he always is when you’re not here. And…”

After a few moments of silence, Cal asked, “And what? What is it, hon?”

Her voice was hushed. “I don’t know if I’m supposed to say anything. It might be a secret.”

“You can tell me. Your daddy and I don’t have any secrets.” His pulse galloped. “Did something happen?”

“Last night he was yelling.”

“That doesn’t sound like your dad. Did he yell at you? Were you naughty?”

“No! Besides, it wasn’t at me. It wasn’t at anyone—it was in the middle of the night. I heard him yelling, and I went to his room. He was asleep. I had to shout for him to wake up. He said it was just a bad dream.”

Cal closed his eyes, steeling himself against the urge to get in the car and drive to the orchard right away. “I’m sure that’s what it was. We all have bad dreams sometimes.”

“I know, but Daddy’s are worse. I heard Mommy talking about it once with Aunt Rebecca.”

“It’s true, your dad has some bad nightmares sometimes.”

“Because of the war.”

“Yes. Because of the war.”

“Do you have nightmares, too, Uncle Cal?”

He sighed, rubbing his face. “Sometimes. ”

“Is it because of Okinawa? I don’t understand what it means. Is that a bad place?”

Cal wanted to say yes—that it was a terrible place. Yet there had once been beauty there, and good people. But the war had turned it all impossibly ugly. He kept his tone light. “Don’t worry about any of that. We’re both fine, and I’ll be there to see you soon.”

“Tomorrow, right? Daddy said you’re coming tomorrow.”

“Actually it’s going to have to be Monday. There’s something I need to do this weekend that’s really important.”

“More important than us ?”

He could practically see Sophie’s pout through the phone. “Never. But I have to go see my mom and dad. Can you tell your daddy to call me when he gets back from work?”

“Okay.” There was a muffled noise, and then, “Adam, don’t! Uncle Cal, I have to go. Bye!”

Cal smiled to himself as he hung up. He couldn’t wait to get back to see the kids—and Jim. Even if Jim hadn’t changed his mind and it was only a visit. Now Cal just had to get through the weekend. He poured himself another drink.

***

“Cal, you remember the Thorngoods?”

He pivoted on the smooth marble of the great hall, his best dress shoes not even making a squeak.

Hundreds of guests crowded under vaulted ceilings and Impressionist frescoes.

His mother placed a diamond-encrusted hand on his tuxedo sleeve.

Her anniversary bracelet was a perfect complement to her engagement ring.

A smile in place, Cal nodded. “Of course. Eva, Michael. It’s been too long.” He kissed Eva’s cheek and shook Michael’s hand.

Aging gracefully, Eva was as coiffed and perfectly presented as ever, the emeralds sparkling in her ears accenting the green shimmer in her black gown. “Cal. How lovely to see you again. ”

“What are you up to these days?” Michael asked.

“I hear you’ve quit the family business like any good prodigal son should.

I thought when you joined the Marines it was the height of your youthful rebellion.

” He was grayer on top and bigger around the middle, but he was still a handsome man.

“You know you can always come work under me. I’m sure I could find a place for you. ”

Cal returned the smile genuinely. “I’m sure you could. You always were a mentor, Michael. But I’m a business owner now.” From the corner of his eye he saw his mother jolt ever so slightly.

She laughed softly, pressing one hand to the scalloped neckline of her satin blue gown. “No tall tales tonight, Cal.”

“Didn’t Father tell you? I was sure he would. We share an accountant, after all.”

His mother’s smile tightened. “Eva, Michael, would you excuse us? I see the Edwardses have arrived and we must greet them.” She threaded her hand through Cal’s arm and tugged gracefully.

As they wove past Cal’s sister speaking in hushed tones with the butler, Cal wheeled, giving his mother no choice but to follow. Laura beamed and planted a kiss on his cheek.

“Don’t you look handsome, big brother?”

Cal grinned. “Always.” He nodded to her upswept hair and gown of deep purple. “And don’t you look ravishing?”

“Always.” She winked.

Cal felt like a heel for how long it had been since he’d seen his sister.

She was eight years younger, and they’d never known each other particularly well what with boarding schools.

Perhaps it was something he could change.

He glanced toward the disappearing butler and snagged a glass of champagne from a passing tray. “Everything all right?”

Laura groaned. “Total disaster. The oysters haven’t arrived yet.” She shook her head. “Mother, I don’t know how you plan these parties all the time. I haven’t slept for days!”

“Years of experience, I suppose.” She tightened her hand on Cal’s arm. “Darling, you must come along. Laura, we’ll see you shortly before the speeches.”

They smiled and chatted with a dozen guests before they were able to escape into the corridor to the east wing. His mother picked up her pace and ducked into one of the day rooms, closing the door behind them.

“All right, what is this talk of a business? What don’t I know?” She frowned, clearly puzzled and possibly a little hurt.

“I honestly thought Father told you. I’m sorry.”

“Your father has been very busy with the bank, and of course I’ve had luncheons and my ladies’ clubs, not to mention running this house. Laura’s tried her best this week to lend a hand since it’s my anniversary, but it’s all very involving. So please tell me what’s going on.”

Cal leaned against the floral wallpaper with one shoulder and ran his finger around the rim of his champagne flute. “I bought half the orchard. Went into business with Jim.”

She blinked and was silent for a few moments. “Jim? That fellow from the war?”

“Yes, Mother. My best friend, Jim Bennett.”

“But…why on Earth would you do that? What do you know about fruit?”

“I’ve learned a lot, actually, but Jim knows apples. I know business. We’re expanding. I had Milton in Philadelphia make an apple press so we can start brewing cider. It was a good business opportunity for me.”

“I didn’t know you were interested in having your own business.” She smiled uncertainly. “You never mentioned that.”

Cal shrugged. “It never came up.”

“I wish it had. I know you don’t believe it, but I’m interested in your life, Cal. I’m your mother.”

Before Cal could respond, the door opened and his father entered, wearing a perfectly pressed tuxedo that stretched across his broad shoulders. He closed the door behind him and wore an unnervingly calm expression on his face. Cal’s mother stood up straighter.

“Our son was just telling me about his new business venture. You never mentioned it.”

“No. I didn’t.” He fixed Cal with a glare.

Cal forced a smile. “Mom, we can talk later. I’ll tell you all about it.”

“Not much to tell.” His father’s face was stony. “Not much at all.”

She raised a smooth eyebrow. “Well, your father started the bank as a business venture and look at it now.”

Cal’s father practically growled. “There’s a hell of a difference between the bank and growing a few apples. It’s a passing fancy. He’ll come to his senses any day now.”

“Will I?” Cal clenched his jaw.

“I might even take you back one more time.”

“How kind. But it won’t be necessary. I’m not coming back.”

His father went on as if he hadn’t spoken. “George Jackson was just telling me about his daughter. She’s twenty-one now. He said she was asking about you.”

His mother clapped her hands together. “She’s a lovely girl, Cal. I admit I’ve had my eye on her for a little while now. I know, I know, you want to choose your own wife. But time marches on, my dear.”

“I’m queer, Mom.”

The words were out of his mouth and fracturing the air, all sharp edges, before Cal could call them back.

She stared, her jaw scraping the plush carpet, and his father’s face went dark red.

In for a penny… “Jim’s not only my best friend. He’s my lover. I want to make a life with him. I’m going to make a life with him, one way or another. I’ll never marry George Jackson’s daughter, or anyone else’s. The life I want is with Jim on our orchard.”

Tears shone in his mother’s eyes, and she peered at him as if she’d never seen him before. He supposed she hadn’t.

She shook her head. “How could you say such a thing? It sickens me.”

“It’s the truth. This is who I am.”

“No. It was that war. The Marines ,” she spat. “If you’d joined the navy and been an officer like you were supposed to, this wouldn’t have happened. They clearly warped your mind. You’re confused.”

“I’m not confused. This is who I’ve always been.”

She laughed wildly. “You most certainly are not! Not my son. My son is not…a disgusting perversion .”

Cal thought he might snap the stem of his champagne glass. “It’s not disgusting to me. That’s my real life, and you need to know. I guess I need you to know it. Even if you can’t accept it.”

A discreet knock at the door was followed by the butler’s low tones. “The speeches are to commence in two minutes.”

Cal’s breath was stuck as he waited, listening to the butler’s footsteps receding. A clock ticked in the silence.

Finally his father cleared his throat. “I think it’s time for you to leave.”

Blinking furiously and dabbing at her eyes, his mother wouldn’t meet Cal’s gaze. “Yes. I think it is. We’ll make your excuses.”

Laughing hollowly, Cal nodded. “You’ve been doing it for years, so why stop now?” He raised his glass. “Here’s to you, Mr. and Mrs. Cunningham.”

After tossing back the champagne, he made his way through the east wing and out the servant’s entrance. The valet jumped up to retrieve the Cadillac, and Cal waited in the cool night, watching his breath cloud the air.

He’d actually done it. He didn’t know whether to laugh or cry.

***

“I really wish you’d have come inside.”

Cal shrugged as he and Jim strolled between the trees. The midafternoon sun beamed down, and crickets sang. He wished he could bottle the tranquillity of the orchard and bring it back to Manhattan. He didn’t miss the honks and clamor even a little.

“Nah. It was the middle of the night. I was afraid I’d wake you all on those creaky stairs. It was easier to just sleep in the car.”

“Next time wake me up, okay?”

“Sure.” Cal couldn’t resist twisting an apple off a low-hanging branch. He bit into it, savoring the sweet tang. “I tell you, they do not make apples like this in the city. Nothing like fresh off the tree.”

“Uh-huh. Are you going to tell me why you showed up here in the middle of the night in a tuxedo? I thought Sophie was seeing things this morning.”

“Yeah, I’ll tell you.” The thought of his mother’s reaction sat in his gut like an unexploded mortar. “Just not right now, all right?”

“All right.”

“Good thing I still have a few duds here.” Cal fiddled with one of the buttons of his plaid shirt.

“Yeah.” Jim stopped by the cider house. “About that…” He licked his lips.

Desire like a rocket shot up Cal’s spine. God, he wanted to kiss those lips. Wanted to pull Jim to the ground and lose himself in him.

“I’ve been thinking about it.”

“About my clothes?” Cal half smiled, butterflies swirling in his stomach. “I am a dapper dresser, whether it’s for evening or apple harvesting.”

Jim laughed. “No. About…everything. Our situation.”

“Right.” Cal’s heart thumped. Please say you want me, no matter what.

He took a deep breath. “Cal, I—”

The low rumble of an approaching vehicle reached them, and Jim glanced toward the laneway. Cal followed his gaze, and a moment later a truck came around the bend. Jim made a noise of surprise, blinking as if he couldn’t believe his eyes.

Cal peered at the pickup. “Who is it?”

A tall man with light brown hair stepped out, wearing the same kind of casual jeans and work shirt Cal and Jim did. He raised his hand in a tentative wave.

“Eddie.”