Page 46

MARA

K nock, knock, knock.

I moaned. Sleep was clinging to me, and I was still so tired from tossing and turning all night. Insomnia was awful, and every night I couldn’t sleep was another day I woke up feeling worse.

Another three raps at the door.

“Go away,” I muttered, throwing my hand behind me to reach for my mini-tab on the nightstand. I snagged it and swung it over to my face, taking a look.

Damn… It was already nine in the morning.

Another knock, more demanding.

I blinked several times, trying to clear the fog.

Knock, knock, knock!

“I said, go away ,” I shouted at the door, and then it busted open, banging against the wall and sending me jumping in my sheets.

Javier marched in, dressed in his uniform. “Rise and shine, prima. You’re late.”

“What the hell, Javi?” Did he seriously just break my damn door?

He shook his finger at me. “Not yet, cousin. Breakfast first, and then hell begins.” He grabbed my sheets and yanked them off the bed .

I shrieked. “What are you doing? Have you gone mad?”

“ ?Vámonos! ” he said, clapping his hands. “Let’s go, de la Puente. On your feet.”

I rubbed my face. He was impossible…totally insane.

“I said move it . Get dressed,” he said, tossing me a pair of black cargos and a black t-shirt.

I picked up the clothes, staring at them. “Where did you get these?”

“They’re Liddy’s. Now get up. We have work to do.”

“No. Go away, Javi—”

“ Now , prima,” he yelled at me. “Don’t make me ask you again.”

Well shit, didn’t he just give me a nasty stare. With a huff, I crawled out of bed and bumbled into the bathroom. God help me for whatever was coming next.

***

My hair was tied up in a ponytail while Javi faced me on a blue mat.

We were in the gym, and while several other soldiers were lifting weights, using the treadmills or stationary bikes, Javi had claimed the mat for us.

Liddy’s clothing fit me okay. The pants were a little long, but I rolled up the cuffs.

The t-shirt fit snug, but not uncomfortably.

I was barefoot as I stepped onto the rubber mat, feeling it give slightly under my weight.

In my hand, I held a long wooden pole almost as tall as I was—black with a silver band in the middle, and slightly tapered at both ends—a bo staff.

I bobbed it in my hand, weighing it. If I held it in the center, it was perfectly balanced.

Javier reached behind his head and pulled off his shirt, tossing it to the side, revealing smooth, firm skin stretched tight over pectoral muscles. And for the first time, I saw Javi’s second tattoo. Wings…a pair of black wings with three words above them: Amor vincit omnia .

“What does it mean?” I asked .

“Love conquers all.” He stepped across the mat, walking parallel to me. The words struck me, but I put them aside and focused.

“Why am I here?” There was no hiding the annoyance in my tone.

He leaned over and picked up another staff from the ground, but his was longer, closer to his six-foot frame. He twirled it elegantly in his hand before pointing it in my direction. “Tus padres te pusieron en la oscuridad, mi prima. Es tiempo para encontrar la luz.”

“ English , Javi.”

He lunged at me, twirling with a yell, and then slammed down his staff right at my face. I gripped my bo staff like you would a sword, blocking just in time.

“What the shit, Javier?” I snapped at him, pushing back and knocking his pole away from me.

“Your parents put you in the dark,” he finally translated.

“It’s time to find the light.” He stepped backwards, holding his staff at the silver band, twirling it over his head before pointing it at the floor.

“Your promised took you from the pit,” he said, and then spun, spinning the staff over his head before swinging down and over to the side.

I moved to block but was too slow, and it smacked me hard on the hip.

“ Ow , you jerk! What’s your problem?” No sooner were my words out when he spun to the right and the staff came flying at me once more, striking me in the thigh. “ Ouch! ”

Javi backstepped, spinning his staff and then holding it out to his side again. “He saved you, just as your brother saved you from the basement…” Then he came at me again.

I shifted my grip to the center of the staff, mimicking my cousin, and only just managed to dodge his initial strike when he twirled and slapped his stupid stick across my back.

I arched, wincing in pain from the strike.

Other soldiers started to circle the mat, morbidly curious as my cousin was finding delight in publicly kicking my ass .

What the hell was his problem? I tried to stretch out the muscle in my back that was threatening to spasm. Turning, I glared as he circled me, the staff at his side once more.

“They pulled you out from the dark, prima, but you never left.”

“What are you talking about?” I spat out.

He lunged at me, swinging his staff. I dropped to the floor, missing what would have been a nasty hit to the head, and then popped back up, swinging my staff to hit him. He blocked—the smack of wood sending a jolt up my arms.

“Good,” he said, twirling the pole and holding it out to the side once more.

He circled me again, staring at me under hooded eyes.

Slowing, he faced me, mirroring my posture.

He tipped his head back, lifted his staff, and pointed it at me once more.

“You’re still in your darkness, cousin. They saved you before, but this time, they can’t help you. ”

He spun, the staff twirling in the most glorious way—totally mesmerizing—until he sent that staff flying at my legs.

I leaped over it, missing the strike, but couldn’t avoid his leg that swept right after, taking mine out from under me as I was landing.

I fell to the floor on my side. My staff bounced and rolled away from me as I winced, propping myself up on my elbow.

Javier stepped before me, his legs shoulder-width apart.

His eyes burned like coals as he stared down at me.

I glared at him. “You have no idea what it’s like to have everyone you love betray you, Javi. To have them lie to your face, day after day, when you deserve to know the truth.” I didn’t deserve this. To be humiliated in front of everyone. To be made to look weak and broken.

It was bad enough that I already was.

“No, prima. Instead, I know what it’s like to have to torture the thing you love most in order to keep her alive. To watch her scream while you pull the trigger so she can live to see another day.”

Oh shit. Was he…was he serious?

“Everybody lied, that’s true. Nobody had the fucking guts to tell you who he was to you in Telvia.

Está bien,” he spat out. “ Fine . Be angry. Be pissed. Yell at him if you want.” He took a step forward, pointing his staff at me.

“But don’t destroy yourself over it. Don’t crawl back into that fucking dungeon over it. ”

My heart thrummed in my chest. My blood pulsed through my veins as though my life depended on it.

Javier pointed at the door with his free hand. “Ese hombre te adora, prima. That man adores you. He has sacrificed everything for you.”

My gaze hardened, but his words were cracking me open, breaking my heart.

“So if you love him…if you truly love him, then don’t sacrifice love to your own fucking demons, Mara. Find your wings. Lift yourself out of your damn prison and choose to fly. He can’t do that for you. Jacob couldn’t do it for you, and I can’t either. You’re the only one who can save yourself.”

My breaths were growing ragged, and I felt myself coming undone.

“Amor vincit omnia, prima. Love conquers all…but only if you let it.”

He offered me his hand, and I felt the weight of that moment.

Just like before, his offer meant so much more than just a simple help up to my feet.

Taking Javier’s hand meant it was time to burn my past. To allow the fire to consume me whole and be reborn from my ashes. It meant it was time for me to rise.

I looked up at my cousin, my heart pounding, my breath heavy as I weighed the choice before me. My eyes drifted to the black ink just past his hand, bringing the tattoo into focus.

Amor vincit omnia .

Love conquers all.

“It’s time to save yourself, prima. It’s time to find your wings.”

Suddenly, something sparked deep within me. Ignited . It grew hot and it blazed and it pushed back against the shadows gripping my heart, causing them to scurry and tremble in the corners of my being.

My little flame .

She burned .

She danced in the fire of my soul.

And I realized then that she was ready. She’d always been ready. I was the only one keeping her from finding steady ground. From burning brighter than she ever had before.

I shifted my gaze back to my cousin, and with a shaky breath, I took his hand.