Page 84 of Reckoning

“She’s just a girl, a child. That’s why I care…”

He snorts, clearly not buying it and, as he jerks his head, as Lara is yanked back, she screams out the words that seal her fate. That seal mine too.

“Aunty Sofia, Aunty Sofia…”

Marsden gives me a shit eating grin that makes me want to punch him so badly.

“You’re so full of shit.” He says crossing the room, coming right at me.

I take aim, I shoot again, and again. Aiming right for his damned head. Only the damned rifle seems to jam. I try to uncock it, to clear the chamber, but there isn’t time.

He grabs me, grabs the rifle and tosses it. “You better pray Otto’s in a good mood.” He says as he starts to bundle me out.

I kick, I scream, I give up all pretence at being rational. Otto’s not going to be in a good mood, at least not in any mood that will help me.

If my brother is truly dead, if my entire family is gone then I am so utterly fucked. They’ll be nothing to stop Otto, nothing to stop Darius. They’re going to hurt me, they’re going to make me pay. Marsden spoke about atonement – I know that the kind the Blumenfeld’s are looking for will be paid with blood. My blood.

As I’m bundled into the car, as the door is slammed shut it feels like I’m already locked away in a dungeon.

It feels like I’ll never see daylight again.

* * *

It’s reckless.Stupid. But once Koen shows me the basics he gets me my own bike. One not nearly as powerful, or as big, or as heavy. And I spend hours riding it around, trying to get some sort of balance and control.

More often than not I end up losing my balance and crashing it and I have some damned impressive bruises.

A few of Koen’s men give me pointers, setting up a little course for me to complete. A few try to hide their sniggers at how bad I am but it doesn’t put me off. I mean, it’s not like I haven’t been laughed at for worse things, is it?

Whatever Koen is up to during the days, wherever he goes, he doesn’t share that with me. A few times he doesn’t come back at night either. I keep my mouth shut, deciding it’s better not to know.

But the house feels strange without him, it feels empty, and in truth, I feel a little lost.

I wake most mornings wondering why he hasn’t visited, why he seems to be losing interest. Did he have his fun and that’s it, he’s bored now? Maybe it’s the fact that I’m readily available. There’s no sneaking around, no chance of getting caught. I’ve ruined the fun. I’ve made myself boring.

No, if that was the case he’d have kicked me out already, would have sent me away.

Koen is up to something, he’s playing games. Only I don’t understand why. He obviously wants to fuck me, why doesn’t he just get on with it?

After one particularly disastrous bike ride I walk in through the back of the house and come face to face with Reid. As usual, he’s scowling at me.

Normally I’d walk away, scurry away. But today, with the bruises fresh and my adrenaline still pumping, I decide that I’ve had enough.

“What exactly is your problem?” I ask.

He narrows his eyes, stepping closer in an obviously threatening manner. “You don’t belong here.”

“No?” I reply, clenching my fists, refusing to back down, despite the voices telling me I’m picking another fight I can’t win.

Stupid Sofia never learns her lessons, does she?

“No. It would be better for everyone if you left. If you walked away and returned to your flashy little life of cocaine and champagne.”

My eyebrows raise. Cocaine and champagne? As if that was ever my life.

“Koen wants me here.” I state, burying the doubt at those words.

He sneers. “You don’t get it, do you? You don’t get that you’re putting all of us in danger.”