Page 14

Nothing was okay.

Nothing felt right anymore.

Everything was…wrong.

Matt had slept restlessly and had been awake for hours. He stared at the ceiling and could swear he heard every creak of Maddie’s mattress through the wall. It was impossible to nod off again. His thoughts were racing and tumbling, and he felt dizzy when he tried to concentrate on her.

Then you don’t have to worry because of course I liked you .

How could she use the expressions don’t have to worry and of course I liked you in the same sentence and not even bat an eye? As if that was obvious! As if he had to know that!

Until now, he’d believed she’d never thought of him as a sexual being, which was why he hadn’t thought about her like that, this past year. And now she was telling him some nonsense about how she had wanted him and would have jumped into bed with him if she hadn’t had her stupid rule?

Besides, was she speaking in the past tense or was it still relevant?

He heard the squeak of a door and then soft footfalls in the hall. The next moment, the shower came on. Groaning, he buried his face in his pillow.

Maddie was apparently an early riser. Yesterday, she’d started the day just as early. And right now, she was standing under a hot stream of water, soaping up. Naked.

If I hadn’t promised myself that I only wanted something serious or nothing at all, I probably would have slept with you that very night .

His groans grew louder.

Why did the guys on the team have to talk about sexual attraction? And why did Maddie mention in passing that he hadn’t been wrong back then?! That she had felt the same way, but she just didn’t want meaningless sex?

That was not something you said to your platonic friend!

It was driving him crazy. He felt like he had been living with one truth for a year – that nothing would ever happen between them because she was absolutely not interested – and suddenly woke up with a completely different one, that something would probably have happened by now, if Maddie hadn’t stuck to her stupid Prince Charming theory.

It was ridiculous. He didn’t know why he even cared. Why was it important? Why was he obsessing about it? It didn’t change anything for him! They were still friends, best friends, and nothing would happen between them. The moment had long since passed.

Suddenly, however, there were these images in his mind that hadn’t been there before. His brain had never permitted it because until now, they’d been an impossibility that wasn’t worth indulging.

Yet now, the images no longer seemed impossible. Now, they simply seemed extremely unlikely. And that, apparently, was all his imagination needed to go crazy.

And anyway, where had this ex-boyfriend suddenly come from? Why hadn’t she ever mentioned him?

What did you think? That I’m a virgin? That I’m such a hopeless romantic, I never gave anyone a chance because no one ever showed up on a white horse?

Obviously, he hadn’t thought about it! Maddie had never even flirted with a man in his presence. And now she wanted to date and had revealed that she would have slept with him and…

He narrowed his eyes, put the back of his hand on his forehead, and inhaled deeply as the water shut off in the next room.

He was being silly. She had been attracted to him, after all. That didn’t change the fact that she had turned him down and they’d become friends. It was ages ago. It didn’t change anything. Well, at least it shouldn’t change anything. No. It wouldn’t change anything.

Thank God he was flying to Phoenix tomorrow for an away game.

He didn’t see Maddie for the next few days…

and he was right, nothing changed. They still texted almost every day, except that Maddie wanted to know what to get at the grocery store and if he was okay with the appointment at Match Me!

on Monday. It was more than their usual, more than wanting to know if he thought a kangaroo could hold its own in a fight with an alligator or if Brad Pitt had aged well.

(In any case, the kangaroo could obviously hold its own and who cared about Brad Pitt?)

They won two games and lost one, which Maddie commented on with various gifs showing animals in various stages of ecstasy or sadness.

She congratulated him when he scored two goals in the game against the Las Vegas Kings, but otherwise, didn’t say much about hockey.

She had told him once that he had enough people in his life he could talk shop with, so she didn’t have to put herself through it.

Oddly enough, that was one of the things he liked most about her. She liked watching hockey and went to the occasional game, but she wasn’t married to the sport. Like…well, all the rest of the people he hung around, even his family.

There was something about being friends with someone who put it all in perspective, who wasn’t obsessed with hockey, who considered other things more important, and who treated his job more like a normal job. He’d never had that before.

When he finally arrived home Sunday morning, he’d had enough space from it that he could smile wearily at his little tantrum earlier in the week. Nothing had changed. She was Maddie and he was Matt. The end.

When he unlocked the door, Maddie was doing the laundry.

He could tell because she was wearing her paint-splattered gray sweatpants and an oversized sweatshirt.

His. It was his sweatshirt. She had pulled her dark hair into a wobbly bun on top of her head, strands falling across her face every second as she perched on the couch in front of hundreds of socks, trying to sort them into pairs.

“You don’t have a laundry basket,” she said in greeting and looked up.

“I used one of your dozens of sports bags. I found this in there too.” She pointed down at the huge sweatshirt, which engulfed her like a Titanic passenger.

“Mine were all dirty, I hope you don’t mind?

I would have asked, but you were on the plane.

” She made a face and looked at him questioningly.

His stomach twisted slightly, that thing that every man’s stomach probably did when they saw a beautiful woman wearing a piece of their clothing. Or maybe it was only him, but it was calming to believe that everyone felt the same way. Nothing had changed.

In keeping with his last train of thought, he replied, “Hello to you too, strange bundle of fabric who leaves socks all over my living room.”

“Sorry.” She grinned and waved one of the socks. “Hello. Glad you’re back. How was the flight? And what do you mean, bundle of fabric?” She looked down at herself. “I’m a sweet marshmallow.”

He snorted and took off his jacket. November was chilly even in California. “The flight was okay, although a bit boring because Dax sat with Lucy the entire time and Leon took the opportunity to list all the reasons why it was stupid to live with you.”

She raised her eyebrows in surprise. “With me?”

“Yes. To be specific: a woman I don’t sleep with,” he said openly. If he hadn’t been feeling strange the last few days, he would have spoken to her about it, right? “Apparently, you’re a cockblocker.”

She gasped dramatically. “What do you mean? I’m actively preventing you from having sex?”

“Something like that.”

“Have you told him how many times I’ve acted as your wing-woman?”

He chuckled softly. “God, no. Then he might have demanded that you do it for him, too. I don’t want to lose my Maddie James exclusive rights.”

“You never will,” she replied seriously. “As long as you keep feeding me tequila sunrises.”

“Deal.”

“Great. Do the others think it’s a stupid idea to let me live here?” She plucked her lower lip with her thumb and forefinger as if she hadn’t thought about it until now.

Hesitantly, he rocked back on his heels. “A few of them. Mostly because they think you can’t live together as two singles in a small space.” Curious, he waited for her reaction. Her thoughts on the matter interested him more than he wanted to admit.

She snorted. “What kind of chauvinistic attitude is that? As if everyone is going to pounce on each other. Come on, that’s not a problem for us.”

Hm. Yeah, he thought so.

Slowly, his shoulders sank. That was good. She had wanted him in the beginning, but that was ages ago. It didn’t matter. Yes, it helped.

A little. Yeah.

So, why didn’t he know whether he was relieved or disappointed by her words?

“I mean, things are going well, aren’t they?” Maddie interrupted his thoughts. “Sure, you’ve been gone the last few days, but you don’t have a problem with me staying here, do you?”

“Nope,” he said, not wanting her to feel bad about it for a second.

“It won’t be forever,” she replied hesitantly. “They said they’d need about three more weeks in the apartment…so, if you wanted to bring women here…” She cleared her throat and buried her chin in his sweatshirt. “Obviously, that would be, um…”

“I don’t want to bring anyone here,” he interrupted her stammering.

Did she sigh in relief? “Okay.”

“Good.” He scratched the back of his neck. “What about you? I mean I said you could invite people over…”

She laughed loudly. “Matt, I want to find the man of my dreams, not just have sex. My dates won’t involve a bedroom for some time.”

He exhaled in relief. “Okay.” He always enjoyed listening to Maddie, but certain things…

“Oh, I did your laundry too, by the way!”

He blinked himself back to the present. “Maddie, you’re my guest, not my housekeeper,” he replied angrily.

“That was pure selfishness! I can’t stand the thought of you wasting water. I don’t mind housework, cleaning and cooking, I find it meditative. Folding socks is kind of romantic.”

He snorted. “Really?”

“Yes. I’m helping them find their life partner who they lost sight of in a terrible flood. If that’s not what Hollywood movies are about then I don’t know what is.”

He chuckled reluctantly and walked past her to his bedroom with his suitcase and bag. He paused, irritated because the door had almost certainly been closed when he left.