Page 33 of Promises We Meant to Keep (Love in Massachusetts #1)

thirty-three

“You got a minute?” Elia stood in front of Kamryn, most of the faculty already leaving after the staff meeting that morning.

Kamryn’s heart raced. She was still feeling some of the effects of her overdrinking at the wedding, and while her brain was moving slower than she wanted it to, her body clearly wasn’t. She couldn’t stop herself from looking at Elia, from noticing the small things about her that made her so damn attractive, and the way that Kamryn instantly relaxed in her presence. Even if she knew she wasn’t going to like the conversation that was coming.

“Sure,” Kamryn answered, staying seated.

Elia looked around the room and shook her head. “If we could go to your office…”

“Oh.” So it was serious. Sure, it’d been a bit of a test, but Kamryn had gotten her answer relatively quickly and without any harm. She cleaned up her workspace and slid everything into her satchel. Elia carried her notebook with her as they walked slowly and silently out of the conference room and toward Kamryn’s office.

Kamryn had no clue what to say. She wasn’t even sure what this conversation was about, and it’d be unlike Elia to bring up the wedding and consequences now. That promised phone call had never happened, and Kamryn was pretty sure it would never happen at this rate.

Did it really matter in the long term?

Or was it just because Kamryn wanted an excuse to spend more time with Elia?

Then again, they were at an odd place in their relationship. Kamryn pushed open the door to her office, keeping it open until Elia stepped all the way inside. Kamryn immediately started to shut it, but Elia shook her head.

“Leave it open.”

“Okay.”

Elia had gotten more finicky about those types of things, and while this conversation might be serious it might not be confidential either, which meant the door could remain open. Kamryn kicked down the door stop so that it stayed in place before heading to her desk to drop her stuff on the top of it. She didn’t sit down in her chair, but leaned against the edge of her desk, crossed her arms, and waited for Elia to begin whatever conversation she decided they needed to have today.

She looked so uncomfortable. Elia kept glancing between Kamryn and the door that she had requested stay open. Her face was drawn, and any of the joy that Kamryn had discovered there in the last few months was completely gone. Everything in her wanted to step forward and wrap Elia up in a hug, soothing whatever this upset was, but she was going to respect boundaries.

At least for right now.

Because they could both be professional, couldn’t they? They’d had fun while the relationship lasted, but the wedding was over. Which meant so was the deal they’d made. It seemed so silly now, to even think that Elia would consider making that deal with her and that Kamryn would even agree to it. They’d both been so reckless, but they’d used that as a way to get their feelings for each other out into the open.

Kamryn didn’t doubt their attraction to each other.

She doubted whether or not their relationship was sustainable.

“I wanted to give you this in person,” Elia finally said, sliding her notebooks around and pulling out a white envelope.

Kamryn’s stomach plummeted. Her heart sank. She didn’t move to reach forward to take it. Elia held it out in front of her, still keeping quite a bit of distance between them. Kamryn gave her a hard stare, her fingers balling into tight fists as she continued to stare at Elia.

After everything they’d been through so far, this was how Elia was going to end things?

“Why?” Kamryn asked. She was trying to hold back her tears first and foremost. This was such a betrayal of everything she’d been trying to do behind the scenes, of everything she was trying to fix.

“It’s the only way this is going to work.”

“I don’t believe you.” Kamryn tightened her grip on her crossed arms and shook her head. “And it’s unacceptable.”

“You can’t reject my resignation.” Elia dropped her hand to her side, her eyes wide in surprise.

“I know I can’t.” Kamryn clenched her jaw, her brain spinning with all the possibilities of how she could get out of this. “That doesn’t mean you resigning is the answer to a problem you didn’t create.”

“I did create part of it,” Elia answered.

“Stop blaming yourself!” Kamryn’s voice came out far louder than she expected it to, and that ticked her off even more. Standing up from the edge of the desk, she paced to Elia and then back again when she caught sight of her flinching.

Kamryn glanced out toward the main office where Mrs. Caldera sat at her desk, no doubt hearing absolutely everything that was going on in there. Because why wouldn’t she? It was her job to run interference for Kamryn when she needed, and it was her job to know things so that she could help the school run more smoothly.

“This isn’t your fault,” Kamryn said, lowering her voice so that hopefully only Elia could hear her. “I told you that I was working on a solution, and that I was looking for the evidence that we’re missing. There’s no reason that eighteen years ago should come back to haunt you again.”

“It’s not eighteen years ago that’s going to ruin my career now.” Elia’s lips thinned, and she barely moved.

How the hell did she manage that?

She was so calm while Kamryn could barely contain the fire that was raging inside her. “Then what is it?”

“You.”

That one word took all the air out of Kamryn’s lungs. She halted her pacing, staring at Elia with wide eyes and parted lips. Once again, Elia glanced toward the open door and shook her head slowly.

“Please accept my resignation.”

“Elia…” Kamryn didn’t want to do it. She didn’t want to take that letter and read the words, she didn’t want to file it away and start the paperwork. She wanted to fight for what was right. She wanted to stand up for the victim and stop the blaming that was never-ending. It wasn’t right. This wasn’t justice.

“Please, Kam.” Elia sounded so pained, her voice breaking on the words. She held her hand out again, the letter loose between her fingers.

Kamryn stared at it. That piece of paper folded inside was the enemy that she had in no way been prepared to face. “I want you to be honest with me.”

“I’ve always been honest.”

“Then I don’t want you to keep any more secrets.” Kamryn took the envelope and tossed it onto her desk without opening it. She couldn’t face that right now.

Elia swallowed, the line of her throat moving as the tension increased in her cheeks and neck and shoulders. Would anyone else even be able to notice how hard this was for her?

“What happened at the wedding?” Kamryn stood right in front of Elia. She wanted the full story of everything that she hadn’t gotten. She wanted that promised phone call with the explanation of a lifetime. Because it wasn’t just about Simone or Susy being there. This was about something else, and Kamryn was once again left out of the loop.

“Nothing happened,” Elia whispered.

“Stop keeping secrets. They’re never good for anyone, and you’ve been carrying enough of them around for years to know that.” Kamryn stared her down. “Trust me. That’s all I’ve ever asked from you.”

Elia let out a shuddering breath, tears welling up in her eyes and threatening to spill over the brim. In any other circumstance between them, Kamryn would have walked up to her and comforted her. But she was too hurt to even contemplate that. She was still reeling from that damn piece of paper with Elia’s resignation.

“What happened at the wedding?”

A few of those tears spilled down her cheeks. “Please don’t make me say it.”

“I want to hear it.” Kamryn’s heart was breaking in two. “I want to hear you say it.”

“It wasn’t fake.” The words slipped from Elia’s lips. “It never was.”

Kamryn sucked in a sharp breath, the truth flooding into her. That was exactly what she’d needed to hear, and it was exactly what she was feeling. “It wasn’t,” Kamryn agreed. “And I don’t want it to end.”

“It has to,” Elia confirmed, and Kamryn watched as she steeled herself. Those little microcosms of change in her body language, the intensity in her gaze and determination filtering through to the rest of her. “This is the only way.”

“For once, Elia, I don’t believe you.” Kamryn took a step forward and halted.

“Is she in?” Simone’s voice rang through to Kamryn’s inner office from the outer one.

“She’s with someone at the moment,” Mrs. Caldera answered. “I’m not sure how much longer it’ll be.”

“I should let you go,” Elia murmured, taking a step away.

Kamryn reached out quickly, snapping her fingers around Elia’s free wrist and stopping her forward momentum. “You don’t get to resign and then just leave, Elia. We need to talk about this.”

“No, we don’t.” Elia had that same hard look as before. “It’s done. I’m done. I’m not fighting this.”

“You’re not fighting alone.”

“I know I’m not.” Elia dropped her gaze from Kamryn’s eyes to her lips. “I never was.” Elia broke Kamryn’s grip and stepped back. “Thank you for all you’ve done.”

“Elia.”

“I’ll start packing up my office first.”

“Elia,” Kamryn tried again, but it didn’t work. Elia was already walking away. She was already disappearing into the outer office and nodding to Simone and Mrs. Caldera.

Kamryn didn’t even have a second before Simone popped her head into the doorway. “I couldn’t help but overhear some of that.”

Great. That was the last thing that Kamryn needed.

“Which was what I wanted to talk to you about anyway.” Simone stepped inside and shut the door with a resounding click. “The wedding.”

Kamryn sighed heavily and plopped herself down into one of the two chairs facing her desk. She wasn’t going to be ready for this talk either, was she?

“Is there more going on between you and Elia than merely friendship?” Simone carefully slid into the seat next to Kamryn. “Because if there is, you should know just how dangerous that can be.”

Kamryn knew. She wasn’t just risking her job and Elia’s by pursuing a relationship there, but she was risking her future career. She could so easily end up with a black mark like Elia had. She’d never be hirable anywhere else.

“Just make sure that you’re making decisions for the right reasons,” Simone continued. “When I married Howie, I thought it was for the right reasons.”

Kamryn flicked her gaze up to meet Simone’s eyes. “I’m not in a relationship with Elia.”

“I thought since you two came to the wedding…” Simone’s eyes widened in surprise.

Shaking her head, Kamryn doubled down on the lie that she’d started because that was where the truth was now. “She came to support me because my ex-girlfriend is also still friends with Andra. And it was a contentious breakup. Hence why I’m living in the dormitories as a house parent.” Kamryn put her hands out to her sides. “Elia was an outside person who could help me through that and who knows the players. Lauren was also a student here twenty years ago.”

“Oh.” Simone frowned. “I just thought with the way you two were acting…”

“Nothing more than friendship.” Why did that hurt so much to say? Because that was the only lie she’d told so far. They’d had so much more than just mere friendship. And Kamryn still wanted more. She should have known better than to let herself get tangled up in this. “Was there something else you needed, Simone? I’ve got a lot of work to get done today.”

Simone eyed her over carefully. “You seem upset.”

“I am, but it’s not by anything you said. I promise.” Kamryn plastered on as much false bravado as she could muster. She clapped her hands onto arms of the chair and started to push herself to stand. “I’d appreciate it if you wouldn’t spread this conversation around. Rumors can be fierce amongst teachers.”

“They can be. That’s why I came to talk to you and no one else.” Simone furrowed her brow. “Because Susy Butkis was asking questions. I didn’t tell her anything, because she’s known for spreading gossip and I didn’t want that to happen. I like you here, Kamryn. You’re good for this school in ways that no other Head of School has been. You get stuff done.”

Kamryn hummed as she sauntered back toward her desk and picked up the envelope that she’d thrown down on it earlier. She needed a way around this one. And she was going to have to force her hand on it. Elia wasn’t going to be happy about it either, and it would push them further down the rabbit hole of separating their relationship, but it was the only way to keep Elia at the school until Kamryn could sort everything else out.

“Elia’s not exactly the most popular teacher here at Windermere,” Simone said. “The most recent board has been out to get her for a while, and I never truly understood why. She didn’t do anything wrong.”

“But she did,” Kamryn said, using Elia’s own words to justify her point. “She left enough questionable space to allow the possibility. And that’s all that’s needed, isn’t it? The mere question of possibilities.”

Simone paused, nodding slowly. “I suppose you’re right.”

Kamryn swallowed the lump in her throat. “I appreciate you coming to me. I’ll speak with the board about some of the events that have happened recently. They really need to be informed about everything that’s gone on.” And by that Kamryn meant everything. She wasn’t going to mince words or her own accusations. She was going to throw Susy under as many busses as she possibly could.

The school wasn’t the problem.

Elia wasn’t the problem.

The board was.

And Kamryn was going to do everything in her power to make things right. Even if it cost her the job of her dreams and the love of her life in the process.