Page 24

CHAPTER 23

I’VE GOT YOU

TOMMY

Tommy was trying to keep it together. He really was. He gripped the steering wheel tightly, checking his mirror as he merged onto the highway. He was doing everything in his power to make sure that, regardless of the chaos tearing through his head and heart, he stayed cool, calm, and collected on the outside.

Cool, calm and collected, even though he’d never felt more like crying in his life.

Nothing had prepared him for the sight of Chuck shaking with sobs on the bathroom floor. The look on his face was so far beyond sadness Tommy didn’t even know the name for whatever had leached all of the joy and vibrancy from the man he would do anything to protect.

Did something happen? Had someone said something to Chuck? Whatever it was must have hurt him so badly that even now, he sat slumped in his seat, his wide shoulders hunched and his face drained of color.

Tommy wet his lower lip and tried to steady himself. Chuck . Focus on Chuck . He needed to make sure that Chuck was safe. “Baby,” he said, the endearment falling from his lips easily. “Can you tell me what happened?”

Chuck was silent for a moment. “Nothing happened,” he finally said.

“Do you know what is happening to you right now?”

“Yeah.”

The response was so quiet Tommy almost thought he hadn’t heard it. But as the word sank in, dread curled and tightened in Tommy’s chest. Whatever was going on with Chuck, it didn’t sound like the first time it had happened.

“Is there someone who can help you?”

Tommy tried to keep his breaths slow and even in the following quiet. “Yeah,” Chuck finally responded.

“Do you have their number?”

“Yeah.”

“Do you want to call them?”

Quiet. “No.”

Tommy opened his mouth to argue, but then Chuck spoke again. “Can you do it?”

Tommy glanced over, finding Chuck’s trembling hand holding out his phone. “Yeah. Of course. I’ve got you.”

He had Chuck pull up the number. He still didn’t know what exactly was going on or who was going to answer the phone, but if they could help Chuck, he didn’t give a shit who they were.

A woman answered. “Dr. Mahoney speaking.”

Tommy did his best to explain who he was and why he was calling, but, unsurprisingly, the woman had insisted on speaking to Chuck. Tommy wasn’t sure what she said, not when Chuck only gave single-word answers and his face remained blank.

Chuck hung up, wordlessly dropping his phone into the empty cup holder.

“Got a plan?”

Chuck nodded.

“Anything I can do now to help?”

Chuck shook his head.

Careful to keep his eyes on the road, Tommy reached into the backseat and grabbed the hoodie he’d tossed on the seat. He passed it to Chuck. “Take a nap while we’re driving,” he told him. “Or at least close your eyes for a little while.”

He caught Chuck out of the corner of his eye, bunching up the hoodie and shoving it against the window before curling up in as much of a ball as he could. Tommy melted just a little bit, something warming in his chest at the thought that he could provide something for Chuck in that moment.

Eventually, Chuck’s soft snores filled the car. Tommy took a deep, relieved breath, and picked up his phone to make a call.

* * *

David’s car was already parked out front when Tommy pulled into Chuck’s driveway.

He turned off the ignition, glancing over to see Chuck was still sound asleep. Carefully, he climbed out of the driver’s seat, closing the door as softly as he could behind him.

David met him in front of the car. “What the hell’s going on?”

“I don’t know,” Tommy answered honestly. “Whatever it is, he’s not okay.” All of a sudden his throat tightened and his eyes burned with the pressure of holding back tears. “Fuck, Hughes, I just want him to be okay.”

Big arms surrounded him right as wetness spilled down his cheeks. “Come here,” David said, tugging Tommy close to his chest in a tight hug.

It was too much for Tommy; he’d been clinging to strength in the face of Chuck’s unexpected breakdown, driven by determination to get the man he loved home and into a safe place. To get him the help he needed.

He’d been scared, so fucking scared, and it was that fear escaping him now as he wept into David’s t-shirt. It was a relief to know he wasn’t alone in this, that he had someone there who loved Chuck just as much as he did.

“We’re going to get him the help he needs,” David murmured, his chin resting on Tommy’s head. “I’ll drive him to see his doc and then we’ll go from there, okay?”

Tommy nodded, gathering himself with a ragged breath. Fuck , he didn’t want to leave Chuck, hated the idea of letting him out of his sight, but if there was anyone else in the world he could trust to look after Chuck, it was David.

He stepped back, wiping his eyes with the back of his hand before glancing at his car. “Wanna drive mine so you don’t have to wake him up?”

David nodded, accepting Tommy’s keys. “I’ll text you, okay?”

“Thanks. Let me grab my shit and then you’re good to go.”

Tommy was reaching into the back seat for his duffel when Chuck stirred. “Tommy?”

“I’m right here, baby.” Tommy opened the passenger door and placed a hand on Chuck’s shoulder.

Chuck blinked big blue eyes at him, a confused frown on his face. “What’re you doing?”

“I’m grabbing my stuff so David can take you to see Dr. Mahoney.”

His frown deepened. “Where are you going?” There was a hint of panic in his voice.

“I’m going to stay here and check on the cats. Make sure they’re fed. I’ll be here when you get back.” Tommy offered a small smile.

“But—”

“I’m just a phone call away,” Tommy reassured. “I’m not going anywhere. Call me and I’ll be there, got it?”

Tommy watched them drive away with a lump in his throat and worry twisting his stomach into knots. Muttering a curse, he made his way up to Chuck’s front door, finding the spare key and letting himself inside.

Immediately, all three cats were winding their way through his legs, their soft hair tickling his shins as their meows and yowls filled the room.

“Hey kids,” Tommy said, leaning over to scratch Angel’s head, only to be interrupted by Bones butting against Tommy’s hand. Sir Mix-A-Lot, ever a classy gentleman, was content to rub his cheek against Tommy’s ankle. “Your dad’s going through something right now, but I’m going to make sure he’s taken care of, okay?”

Angel looked up at him and meowed.

“I know, I know, he’s the best there is,” Tommy responded, nodding at the little cat. “He’s the best of all of us, really.”

He gave out a few more minutes of affection to the cats before straightening, wincing at the creak of his knee. “Come on, you three. Let’s get you some food. Not sure what kind of shape your dad’s going to be in when he gets back, so I figure the least I can do is take care of you.”

Once the cats were fed, Tommy made a batch of the pasta salad he knew Chuck liked—with extra olives—and stashed it in a Tupperware in his fridge. He cleaned up the kitchen, changed the sheets on Chuck’s bed, and then vacuumed the living room. He took a quick shower to rinse off the sunscreen and sweat, and, dressed in sweats and a borrowed t-shirt from Chuck’s closet, realized that there was nothing left to do.

He wandered out in the living room, put in his ear buds, and tried to listen to a podcast about Alexander the Great’s visit to the Oracle at Siwa in Western Egypt, but he wasn’t retaining a single thing the deep-voiced British man was saying.

A phone call interrupted the podcast and he rushed to answer without looking at the screen. “This is Tommy,” he said.

“Littleton, hi. It’s Deb.”

Tommy blinked, surprised. “Uh, hi. What’s going on?”

“Your boyfriend,” she said, direct as ever. “Chuck. Is he okay?”

“Um.” Again, Tommy felt himself overcome with emotion, eyes welling up even as he shook his head. He cleared his throat. “I’m not sure yet, but he’s getting help right now.”

There was a moment of quiet. “That’s good to hear. He seems like a very nice man.” Another pause. “Mei Lin said he was kind to her, which isn’t always the case at work events.”

“He’s wonderful,” Tommy replied. “As is Mei Lin.” He rubbed a hand over his mouth. “How’d the swim go?”

Deb snorted. “Ridiculous, but fine.”

“Did you win?”

“Of course.”

Tommy laughed. “Good for you, Deb.”

She paused. “You’re not upset.”

Tommy was shocked to realize he wasn’t. After everything, after all the weight and expectations he’d put on that singular event, it had all vanished the moment he’d found Chuck on the bathroom floor.

He hadn’t been thinking about the race or the promotion when he’d ushered Chuck out the back door, hadn’t been thinking about Rick, or work, when he’d driven them back to Charleston.

He didn’t regret walking away for even a second.

“If you get the job,” Tommy began, “then it’s deserved, Deb. You’re a great manager. Your team respects you, your sales numbers are always high, and I’ll always be a phone call away if you want to talk customer service.”

“You okay over there?”

Tommy let out an exhausted laugh, tilting his head back to face the heat of the afternoon sun. “No, Deb. I’m not doing so hot.”

“I’m sorry, you know. It should have been the two of us out there today, and I’m sorry it didn’t happen like that.” With a sigh, Deb went on. “Do you want to talk about it?”

“I’m going to be honest with you, Deb, I can’t find a single fuck to give about Rick or that race. I’ve been so lonely and it’s taken me a long time to get over the hurt from my divorce, and I thought maybe it would all feel a little bit better if I got that job.” He stood up, hunger driving him into the kitchen. He pulled a block of sharp cheddar from the fridge and tossed it on the countertop. “But I don’t need the money. I’m not looking to get promoted out of state. I have a good life here, surrounded by an amazing team at work and the best friends a guy can ask for. And I think that might be enough.”

“Someone once gave me some really good advice about work.”

“Oh yeah?”

“Sometimes it’s okay for a job to just be a job. Sometimes, if it’s enough to pay the bills, it’s okay to show up and do your work even if your passions lie elsewhere.”

“Damn.” Tommy grabbed a knife, holding his phone against his ear with his shoulder as he sliced into the block of cheese. “What the hell am I supposed to do now? After all these years of having a work nemesis now I’ve got a work bestie.”

Deb snorted a laugh. “Don’t get too soft on me now, Littleton.”

“Why do you want the job?”

She didn’t hesitate to answer. “We want to have kids,” she said softly, surprising Tommy with her gentle tone. “And it’s expensive. Mei Lin wants to carry them, and I want to give her that. Seeing the person you love get to live out their dream? That’s worth all of it for me.”

“That’s amazing, Deb,” Tommy said, leaning back against the high marble countertop. “For what it’s worth, I think you’re going to be a great mom.”

Again, she snorted. “It’s going to take me a while to get used to you being nice to me.”

“Buckle up, Deb. I’m a very devoted friend and a huge fan of hugs.”

“No. Absolutely not.”

They both laughed, and a little bit of the tightness and worry that had taken up residence in his chest loosened. Maybe it was the sharp cheddar that never failed to remind him of home or maybe it was reaching this point in his friendship with Deb. Whatever it was, it helped, just a little bit.

“I’m going to go,” Deb said.

“Have fun. Say hi to Mei Lin.”

“Good.”

“Great.”

The phone clicked as she hung up.

Tommy was halfway through the block of cheese when his phone buzzed.

Chuck: Are you at the house?

Tommy: Here and waiting for you, baby.