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Chapter Sixteen

JUST THE WOMAN

~~Junie~~

I’m putty in his hands. I’m anything he wants me to be. I’m completely under his spell. In other words, I’m crazed. I can’t get enough of him. I silence all the warning bells going off in my head. I’m diving in full speed and not looking backward or forward. Only living in the moment.

I literally rip open his shirt, and buttons pop off, but neither of us gives a shit. When he pulls a condom from his pocket, I grab it, rip it open, and roll it onto his rock-hard erection.

“Fuck me.” I sound as if I’m going to die, and maybe I am. “I fucking need you inside me.”

“I fucking need to be inside you.” He doesn’t waste time but pushes into me. I throw back my head and let out a strangled scream.

“Don’t be gentle. Fuck me.” I dig my fingernails into his arms, but he doesn’t flinch. If anything, the pain drives him. He slams into me, buried balls deep. I adjust my hips to take him deeper and elicit a groan from him.

I’m a goner. We fuck in the back of his SUV, and I’m beyond caring if anyone comes along and catches us. He hammers into me as if this is the last sex he’ll ever have, and the memories must last a lifetime. The thought almost sobers me until I shove it back in the box where it belongs. Levi and I have never been able to get enough of each other. Why would that stop now?

He plunges deep a final time and shudders as he comes. I feel him as if he’s part of me, like we’re one person, one soul, one body, one mind. I’ve never had this connection with another man. Never. I doubt I ever will again. It’s not as if I don’t have a lot of experience with men, but none of them have ever done the things to me Levi does. Not even my ex, and our sex had been unequaled until this hot hockey player blew away all the competition.

My orgasm consumes my thoughts, and I’m flying high, fueled by pleasure. We cling to each other, panting and sweaty. I rest my head on his shoulder cheek to cheek. We hold each other for a very long time until sanity returns.

With reluctance, Levi backs away. I enjoy the view of his bare ass. He discards the condom into a nearby garbage. When he returns, I’m still sitting on the back tailgate area trying to collect my emotions and gather my thoughts, which isn’t really working. He sits next to me and pulls me onto his lap. I sigh with contentment as I wrap my arms around his neck and nuzzle him. He smells of sweat and sex and Levi. He has a special scent that’s always affected my libido in an uncontrollable fashion.

As rational thought returns, I’m drifting toward the regret stage.

What have I done?

My actions demonstrate how weak-willed and lacking in restraint I am. I have no excuse for my lapse in judgment. Even worse, I know I’m going to do it again. Tonight. After all, we haven’t made it to my place yet.

“What will Benjamin say?” Levi asks with a troubled gaze. We’re both oblivious to the fact that we’re sitting in a public park minus clothes from the waist down and with ripped-open shirts.

“Benjamin?” I blink, not comprehending.

“Yeah, the guy you’ve been seeing.” He cocks his head and narrows his gaze suspiciously. I think he’s onto me. He doesn’t believe Benjamin exists. But he does, just not the way Levi assumes.

“He’ll be jealous and upset. He doesn’t like to share.”

“Oh.” Levi’s handsome face betrays his distress. I should tell him the truth, yet part of me feels he deserves it. “He’s not at your place right now is he?”

“He lives there. Are you concerned?” I might be toying with starting another fuck-buddy relationship with him, but it’ll be on my own terms.

“Not really. I can kick his ass if he gets out of hand.”

I throw back my head and laugh. His confused expression is so precious that I kiss him—hard. And we start making out again. His erection is quickly growing hard again, but even I, in my semi-aroused state, know we’re tempting fate. No one has pulled into this parking lot yet, and we’ve been lucky.

As if on cue, headlights appear through the tall cedar trees. The car travels slowly down the winding road toward the parking lot.

Our gazes meet. We jump to our feet, gather up our clothes, run for our respective car doors, and dive inside. The car approaches and pulls into a spot about thirty feet from us. The Mercedes engine roars to life, and Levi guides the SUV from the parking spot.

We’re out of the park and back on a city street when Levi blows out a breath. “Damn, that was close.”

“Yeah, but it was fun, wasn’t it?” I pull on my underwear and pants, then button my shirt.

“The most fun ever.” His grin is visible in the dashboard light, and I’m reminded of how sexy, hot, and gorgeous this man is. He might be young, but he makes up for it in the sack, not that we used a bed tonight, but we will.

“Ever? What about all those other times?”

“They were also the most fun ever. You are the most fun ever.”

Levi guides his SUV into a parking space near my apartment. I wait while he pulls on his underwear and pants. He hurries to the passenger side and opens my door.

“Oh, you’re being a gentleman. Are you earning points for something?”

“You know I am.” His cocky grin is so endearing. I truly do enjoy being around this guy.

Together we mount the steps to my second-floor apartment. It’s a tiny two-bedroom, which I can barely afford right now with the high Seattle rental prices, especially since I lost my roommate. Levi has been here several times before.

I open the door, and he follows me in. Heading for the kitchen, I glance back at him. He’s already making himself at home in front of the TV and scrolling through the sports stations.

“Beer?”

“You know it.” He flashes one of those grins that usually drop my panties and everything else I’m wearing, but somehow, I keep myself dressed. For now.

Benjamin waddles out of the bedroom where he’s obviously been lounging while waiting for his wayward servant to find her way home. He stops and studies Levi, who doesn’t notice him. After careful consideration of the interloper in his castle, Benjamin strolls over to the couch and hops onto Levi’s lap. Levi grins and starts petting and talking to the cat. I’ve never seen him around animals, and my heart warms at the greeting he’s giving my cat.

“When did you get a cat?”

“I didn’t. He got me. Picked me from a group of prospective homes and moved in.”

Levi laughs, such a joyous sound I find myself grinning like a fool, but then I am a fool for letting this guy back into my life. Then he sobers. “I always wanted a pet as a kid, but my stepfather hated animals.” His obvious sadness breaks my heart.

“That tells me all I need to know about him.” I don’t disguise my anger at this man I’ve never met, as I pull a beer and a bottle of wine from the fridge.

“Pretty much.” He shrugs, clearly not wanting to talk further about his family, whom he’s avoided speaking of in all the months I’ve known him.

“He’s an asshole,” I mutter.

“You have no idea.” He brightens somewhat. “What’s his name?” He points at the cat currently making biscuits on his thigh. Levi shifts uncomfortably and moves the cat slightly to lessen the effect of the needlelike claws on his leg.

I’m looking forward to answering this question but briefly wonder if I should put that particular card on the table just yet. “You can’t guess his name?”

He rubs his chin thoughtfully. “Uh, Sockeye?”

“Oh, no. Why would I name him that?”

“No clue. So, what is it?”

I carry his beer and glass of wine to the couch and sit down next to him. Benjamin immediately leaves Levi to crawl on my lap. His purring vibrates the entire couch, or so it seems. Levi takes a long pull before watching me expectantly.

“Well?” he prods.

“Benjamin. His name is Benjamin,” I say with a completely straight face.

“What?” He turns to stare at me in disbelief. “This is Benjamin?”

“The one and only.” I snort out a snicker.

“Why did you lead me to believe he was a person?”

“Because your reaction’s so entertaining. I think you’re jealous of the little guy.”

Levi glowers, not liking being called out on his jealousy. “Only because I thought he was a human.”

“Don’t insult him. He won’t like it. Admit it, you were jealous.”

“No, I’m not the jealous type.”

“That’s not what I heard, Mr. Widmer.”

“Maybe a little,” he concedes with an embarrassed shrug.

“The great Levi Widmer, premiere womanizer of the Sockeyes, is jealous of a cat. What would your buddies say if they heard that?”

“Nothing because you won’t tell them.”

“How do you plan to stop me?” I’m playing with fire asking that question, but his answer is well worth it. His mouth is on mine in a heartbeat, his hands are everywhere, and he’s making it clear the cat is no competition for a real man. He might be right there, but I won’t give him that satisfaction.

After our brief make-out session, he’s ready to head to the bedroom, but I resist.

“We have unfinished business.”

“Unfinished? Damn right. I need to fuck you again. It’s permanent unfinished business.”

“Good try. That’s not it.”

He narrows his gaze and studies me. I see the exact moment he realizes what I’m asking for. “I owe you a big apology. I don’t think you’re boring or too old. I lied because pissing you off made ending our arrangement easier.”

I take a long moment to process his words. “I don’t understand. Why?”

He’s clearly uncomfortable and doesn’t want to answer. “I—I?—”

“Levi, what is it? You can trust me, and I have a right to know, especially considering days later you’re regretful, start sniffing around again, and are in my apartment right now.”

The only time I’ve seen him this nervous is when he ended it between us. He’s doom-scrolling through the offerings on television, reluctant to answer me.

“Levi, answer me.” I implore him to explain himself. I need to understand what’s going on. This yo-yoing can’t continue. He stares at the television and doesn’t respond, but I’m certain he’s not registering what’s on the screen. I steal the remote and place it on the end table out of his reach.

He turns his head and manages a contrite smile. “Sorry.”

“Tell me. You can trust me. You know that, right?”

We came to my place to screw each other’s brains out. I hadn’t bargained for deep conversation or some kind of emotional unloading, yet intuitively I know Levi needs it.

And I’m just the woman to get him to talk.