Page 12

Chapter Twelve

THE LUXURY OF SUCH FOOLISHNESS

~~Juniper~~

To say I’m nervous is an understatement. Tonight is my first time doing pre and postgame meals. I pray I don’t screw this up. I’ve brought along Benjamin for moral support, though I’m not sure he’s interested in filling the role of emotional support animal. Regardless, I feel better knowing my furry little friend is nearby in case I need to hug him or be soothed by his purring.

I park in the lower parking garage of the stadium in the same area as the players. I don’t get out right away but sit in the car and give myself a silent pep talk. I can do this. I must have faith in my abilities.

Benjamin stirs from his curled-up position on the passenger seat and crawls into my lap with his motor running. I stroke his fur and am calmed by his support. Adopting this stray is the best thing I’ve done for myself in a long time.

“Hey, buddy, I’m going to leave you for several hours. I’ll check back a couple times. You’ll be fine here. Just take long naps.”

Benjamin meows and rubs against me. I didn’t have the heart to leave him in the apartment. He can sleep in my car as well as he can at home, and I’ll have the option of checking on him.

I pour some water from a bottle into a small bowl along with some food in another bowl and set them on the floor of the passenger side. Benjamin forgets I exist and wolfs down his dinner. I shake my head and laugh before getting out, locking the car, and making my way to the kitchen area.

My staff and I did all the prep work we could in advance. Milo brought everything over earlier in one of the team vans. I did my research this time. The pregame meals should consist of lots of carbs, lean protein, veggies, and snacks. I talked with the coaches and a few players about team preferences. I would’ve asked Maddie, but I don’t trust her. I sure as hell won’t ask Celeste. She’d love another opportunity to throw me under the bus.

I enter the kitchen and make a quick assessment of what should be done first. I’d checked out this kitchen a few days ago to get the lay of the land and make sure everything’s in order.

Milo is already hard at work, and Maddie enters right behind me. I give them directions and go about my own tasks.

Maddie stomps around, slamming pots and pans and making it obvious she’s pissed about something. I ignore her as long as I can. She isn’t speaking to either of us, and I consider her pouting to be a manipulation. She’s dying for me to ask her what’s wrong, and I won’t give her that satisfaction.

“Hey, got a minute?” Levi pokes his head in the door.

“Sure, what’s up? Need more bread?” I joke with him. I’m trying my best to treat him the same as any other player.

“Nah, not yet.”

“You guys okay here for a few minutes?”

Milo nods, and Maddie glares. If looks could do physical damage, I’d be in the hospital. I ignore her and follow Levi into the hallway. He’s strangely nervous. I can count on one hand how many times I’ve seen Levi discombobulated. He’s such a confident guy 99 percent of the time.

“I apologize for interrupting your pregame meal prep. I have to get this off my chest, or it’ll weigh me down during the game.” He wrings his hands and stares anywhere but at me. I’m intrigued by what’s gotten him so wound up.

“That sounds like the introductory line to a breakup, but we’ve already done that.” I laugh, but he doesn’t. He’s uncharacteristically humorless.

“I’m sorry.”

I shrug one shoulder. I’m not answering that question. He waits a few uncomfortable moments before seeming to realize I’m not opening up.

“Do you forgive me?” Levi lifts his head and looks me straight in the eyes.

I’m drawn in as I always am but have the presence of mind to break the contact. Frowning, I stiffen. I don’t know what his intentions are, but I’m not buying what he’s selling. Hell, I won’t even lease or take a test run of what he’s selling.

“Levi, this could’ve waited.” I not so gently remind him we both have a game to get ready for.

“I’m really sorry.”

“Look, if you’re feeling guilty, stop. There’s nothing to forgive. Our breakup was mutual.”

Milo slips out the door and catches my attention. “Juniper, sorry to interrupt, but I need your help.”

“I’ll be right there.” I wave him away, and he retreats into the kitchen. I turn back to Levi. “Is there anything else I can help you with?” I make sure my tone is professional.

His uncertainty is more pronounced than ever. “No. Nothing.” He’s lying, and I know it.

Puzzled, I stay rooted to the spot until he’s out of sight. He looks so good with his shaggy hair all tousled as usual and those blue eyes that see too much. Damn, I miss him. I shouldn’t, but I do.

Shaking my head, I return to the kitchen having no clue what the hell his end game is. His behavior doesn’t add up, the nervousness, his inability to articulate whatever’s bothering him, and then his escape without addressing the issue.

“Levi, Levi, Levi, what’s going on in your head?” I say out loud to myself.

Maddie glares accusingly in my direction. I disregard her bad attitude. At some point, I’ll need to address her hostility toward not just me but Milo, who’s done nothing to her. She’s a typical bully, picking on the poor kid because she perceives he’s weaker and an easy mark.

The pregame meal is a hit. The guys chow down according to their usual pregame habits and rituals. I’m beaming by the time the last guy finishes up. After we eat, we clean up, and I give my two workers a half hour break before we start postgame meal preparation. I’m excited about this meal because I get to cook whatever I want within certain parameters, and I can’t wait for the guys to see what we’ve prepared. For the entrée, they’ll have a choice of garlic butter salmon, chicken parmesan, or stuffed rolled turkey breast. We’ll have multiple side dishes, and I made more of my very popular bread.

I’m feeling pretty good about this job with the exception of working with Maddie and Celeste, but they will not deter or discourage me. Since we have a half hour before we start our postgame meal prep, I walk down the long hallway to the parking area to check on Benjamin.

I slip into the passenger seat, and my kitty immediately makes himself at home on my lap. He’s making biscuits on my thigh. I’m grateful my pants are relatively thick, or he’d make me a human pincushion.

Fifteen minutes later, I decide to get an early start on prep and head back to the kitchen. I relish the peace and quiet, knowing it won’t last long.

“The guys are raving about your meals.” Caro gingerly enters the kitchen, holding her stomach and maneuvering her unwieldy body past a kitchen counter.

“Thanks. I’m getting the hang of it. Things were touch and go for a while though.”

“Regardless, you’ve recovered nicely.”

“How’s the little guy?” I indicate her baby bump, which is more like a bowling ball than a bump.

She smiles tiredly. “He kicked all night long. I told Easton this son is going to be a soccer player.”

“I can see you as a soccer mom.”

“Oh, god, no. We’re a hockey family through and through. He’ll be on skates before he can walk.”

“I’m sure of that. Easton wouldn’t have it any other way.”

“Junie, I’m proud of us both. We’ve come a long way.”

“We have.”

“I want you to be as happy as Easton and I are.” She wipes a few tears from her eyes. Lately Caro has been getting pretty emotional. I’m guessing it’s rampant hormones.

“Someday. I’m not in the market for a full-time boyfriend right now.”

“Too bad. Easton’s brother just flew in, along with his mom. She’s staying for a month or two to help me out.”

“His older brother, Zane?”

“One and the same. His team didn’t make the playoffs for the umpteenth year in a row. He says he’ll be living vicariously through Easton.”

“That sucks for him.” I recall Zane. He’s two years older than Easton and hot as fuck. He’d be a great temporary distraction from Levi.

“We’ll all hang out. Wouldn’t that be fun?”

“I’d love to.” Zane and I had a wild weekend years ago that even Caro doesn’t know about. I wouldn’t mind a repeat performance. Caro would like nothing more than seeing the two of us together. I’m not so sure.

“You don’t sound overly enthusiastic. It’s not Levi, is it?”

“Levi? No, we’re through. I’ve moved on and so has he.” I snort with laughter as I tell her about Levi believing Benjamin is my latest guy friend rather than a cat. “I didn’t lie. Benj is a guy and a friend.”

“That’s right.” She lowers her voice and moves closer even though there’s no one around to hear. “What’s up with Levi? Is he still coming around?”

“No, not really. I mean we aren’t together or anything.” I don’t tell her the attraction is still there for both of us.

“Easton said he doesn’t seem overly happy lately.”

“I noticed that too. Well, none of my concern.”

“No, he isn’t. Let’s keep it that way.” She’s never approved of my infatuation with Levi for multiple reasons.

“I’m sorry, but I really have to get back to work.”

“I know. I wanted to stop by and let you know Zane’s in town.”

“I appreciate that.”

“Do you care if I give him your number?”

“No, that’d be fine.” Instead of imagining making out with Zane, my stupid brain wonders if Levi will be jealous. I get immense pleasure out of such a possibility.

I return to work. There’s a television mounted over the buffet area, and I note the guys are warming up on the ice. One of the downsides of this job is not being able to watch the game in person, but I’ll live with that small inconvenience. I might be able to sneak out a few times to catch a couple minutes here and there.

The half-hour break did nothing to improve Maddie’s attitude, and my irritation grows in leaps and bounds.

“That’s not how you do that, you idiot,” Maddie snaps at Milo, and my blood boils over. Milo is literally shrinking into himself. I quickly move to intervene.

“Maddie, a word with you.” I gesture for her to follow me into the hallway. She takes her time joining me. Not a wise move on her part, as I’m steaming by then and ready for battle. As soon as we move out of earshot of anyone nearby, I light into her.

“I’ve had enough of your attitude. I don’t know what the fuck is wrong, and I don’t give a shit. You’re paid to do a job, and with that job comes certain expectations, such as courtesy and kindness toward your colleagues. You’ve been harping on Milo since day one, and it stops now.”

“He can’t do anything right.” She narrows her gaze to one of absolute surliness.

“You’re not his supervisor. And if someone was bitching at me constantly, I’d be so worried about screwing up, I’d make more mistakes instead of less. If you have a problem with Milo, you come to me, but you will not attack him directly ever again. Understand?”

“Fine.”

Funny how fine is a four-letter word, too, and often can be used interchangeably with fuck. I’m so tired of this woman’s antics. I wish I could fire her on the spot, but Rose has the final say in firing and hiring. Besides, finding a replacement will be next to impossible considering the short time frame and the uncertainty of how long the job will last. Maddie will be done once the guys play their last game. I’ll see to it. I’m not keeping her past that point. I remind myself that I may not have job after the season ends either.

“I want you to apologize to Milo.”

Maddie stiffens, and her glare turns murderous. I’m glad she’s not holding a knife right now. I’m pretty sure she’d leave me to bleed out on the floor. I wait her out in this war of wills. She’s literally vibrating with fury, and I’m fed up. She meets my furious gaze briefly before looking away as if disinterested, but I know better. I just scored one for the home team.

“Well?” I prod.

“I’ll apologize.” She pivots on a heel and stalks off. My own fury gives way to amusement, and I can’t stop the laughter bubbling up inside me. I quickly gain control of myself as the boys finish with their warm-ups and trundle down the hallway toward the locker room.

Levi passes by and gives me a gentle tap with his gloved hand. His smile is warm and inviting, showing promise of hot nights to come. But there will not be any more hot nights with Levi. I will not fall under his spell again. I’m not a fool, and I’ve seen the light. He might have regrets and second thoughts, but I cannot allow myself the luxury of such foolishness.

Besides, Zane’s in town. I’ll bet he’s as hot as ever.

And Levi will be stewing in a dish of his own making.

Once again, I berate myself for thinking about other men in terms of how Levi might react. I don’t need him, and I definitely don’t need Celeste’s game-playing bullshit.