Page 10

Chapter Ten

A PIECE OF ME

~~Juniper~~

Last night, I spent my waking hours cuddling with my new cat and musing about why Levi called. He only verified what I already knew. Celeste set me up. She sacrificed the team’s well-being for her own selfish purpose. I have very little choice but to confront her. Staying quiet communicates I’m scared, and she’ll accelerate her hate campaign even more.

My bratty evil twin is infinitely amused that Levi thinks Benjamin is a new boyfriend and seems disturbed about this man in my life. If he only knew. He’s been replaced by a furry, demanding little creature, who’s way more dependable and lovable in my opinion. But I might just be a little bitter.

I arrive early to work as usual. Maddie will have told Celeste by now that I’m going back to a more conservative menu with tried-and-true team favorites. Before Celly comes after me, I’m going on the offense and going after her. I’ve rehearsed my speech for hours, and it’s time.

At 8:05 I’m in her office. She hasn’t even taken off her coat yet.

“Good morning, Celeste.” I keep my tone friendly to throw her off.

She eyes me warily, not falling for my fake pleasantness. Turning, she takes off her coat and hangs it on the coat rack in a corner of her modest office. I take a moment to glance around. Know your enemy and all that. It’s strikingly impersonal, but I guess that could be said about my tiny office, too. There aren’t any family photos, pet photos, or even photos of male conquests. The only personal item is a small figurine of a unicorn with a chipped horn sitting on the desk. Odd. There has to be a story behind that, but I don’t care enough to ask.

“What do you need?” she snipes, not hiding her annoyance at being accosted by the likes of me first thing in the morning. I’m secretly triumphant. She sits down in her chair. By the look on her face, she realizes she’s made a grave error by giving me the height advantage. If she stands now, she’ll be admitting to her discomfort, so she doesn’t.

I move forward, place my hands on her desk palms down, and give her my best don’t-mess-with-a-ginger glare. “All I need is for you to listen.”

She folds her hands in front of her and adopts a bored expression. “I’m listening.”

“You set me up.” I mount my attack, and I won’t back down.

“How?” She blinks innocently, but I’m not fooled.

“You suggested I vary the menu, which hasn’t exactly been welcomed by the team.”

“The guys do like variety. Maybe it’s your presentation? Or your lack of expertise. You’d probably be better sticking with basics even if they get bored with limited fare. Besides, if you knew what you were doing, you wouldn’t have followed my instructions. Maybe I’m testing you, and you failed the test.”

“Fuck you.” I’m taken aback momentarily. She wasn’t testing me, was she?

“Such language. Not very professional but expected from someone as crass and uneducated as you.”

She’s right. Foul language isn’t professional. Not at all. But I don’t care at this point. I may need this job, but I don’t need her in my life. “Neither is it professional to compromise our players’ playoff chances. You, of all people, must know how important proper nutrition is for athletes, especially in the playoffs. You know I lack experience. Instead of giving me useful advice, you chose to sabotage me at the expense of the team.”

Her facade falls for a moment, and I see a side of her I would never have guessed exists. She resembles a scared little girl who’s fighting to keep her head above water. But as quickly as the mask slips, it’s back in place again.

“I have work to do. Please leave my office.”

“Gladly.” I hold my head held high, out the door, and stride purposely toward the bank of elevators. As soon as I exit one, I run into none other than the subject of too many of my waking thoughts and nighttime dreams. Just the person I need to see. Not!

“Hey,” he says sheepishly with an uncharacteristically shy smile. That is not my brash Levi. Okay, well, he’s not my Levi at all. I have to stop thinking that way. He dumped me, and that’s his cross to bear. He’ll be sorry if he isn’t already. At least, my ego wants to believe he regrets his decision.

“Hi.” I sound harried to my own ears.

“Everything okay?” He studies me with concern I don’t want him to feel. For such a selfish guy, he’s intuitive. Or maybe the selfish act is just that—an act.

“Absolutely. Couldn’t be better,” I say flippantly.

He grimaces briefly before nodding. We pass by each other as if we’re only acquaintances. Was it only a week or two ago we were on again and all hot and heavy? Seems like a lifetime.

I enter the kitchen. Milo is chopping veggies for the omelets, and Maddie’s cracking eggs and putting them in a large bowl. I skirt past them and start frying the mounds of bacon and sausage. My stomach rumbles as the heavenly smell of bacon fills the room. I’m Team Bacon all the way. I recall one morning when I cooked a package of bacon for Levi, and we sat naked in bed and ate the entire batch. Then we screwed each other’s brains out, because that’s what we did, before settling into a bacon-and-sex-induced coma. I will not fall back under his spell again. I know how guys are. They’re all attentive, agreeable, and loving until you’re completely tangled in their web of manipulation, cruelty, and deceit, then their real self comes out. Levi might appear different, but he’s not. I’m attracted to the bad boys, and I seek them out. Levi may not be a biker or a gang member, but he’s a player at the highest level, and that alone means he should never be entrusted with my heart. And what do I know? He might have been the abusive type once I got to know him. I don’t need his brand of grief and pain. It’s best he thinks Benjamin is a guy. Levi believing my homeless cat is a boyfriend amuses me to no end.

Maddie clears her throat to draw my attention. She shoots daggers at me. My tolerance level is low. “What’s your problem?” I don’t temper my tone but give her both barrels full of annoyance.

She quickly looks down and mutters, “Nothing. Nothing at all.”

“Good. Let’s keep it that way.”

An hour later, I’m at the omelet station waiting nervously for my first customer. Ice wins that honor. On my first day he ordered a four-egg omelet with the works, as in everything I had available.

“Ice, would you like the usual?”

“The usual?” He cocks his head and stares at me quizzically. “You remember?”

“Yes, four eggs and the works.”

His smile is reward enough. I get to work on his omelet, and it’s a masterpiece if I do say so myself. He grins from ear to ear, which is rare for him, as he takes the plate and heads for a seat at one of the tables.

Breakfast is a hit. The guys love it. They’re complimenting me left and right. So much so it’s almost embarrassing, even humiliating. In the end, I’m at fault. I didn’t do the proper research on professional hockey players’ nutritional needs. Even worse, I took a deceitful person at her word.

After breakfast, Levi approaches me. “Breakfast was superb.” He holds up his fingers to his lips and flicks them to indicate how much he loved it.

“Thank you.”

“What spices did you put in that? It was the best omelet I’ve ever had.”

“Well, you know how it goes. I could tell you, but?—”

“I’d have to kill you,” we both say in unison before laughing.

Damn it, but I miss this guy. I shouldn’t. It’s funny, but when we split, I didn’t think it’d be a big deal. I’d miss the sex, but I convinced myself that’s all I’d miss because that’s all we had together. Yet ever since, I’ve been pining away for the little things we had, not just the sex, but the banter, the easy conversations, even the hockey talk. I’m a huge hockey fan and have been since I was a kid. My parents had season tickets to the local farm team, and it was a family affair.

Such thoughts make me wistful. I haven’t seen or spoken to my parents in years—since Chris and I were together. I wonder if they realize I divorced him. My stupid pride hasn’t allowed me to reach out. We said awful things to each other back then, and it still stings to think about it. Chris influenced my behavior, actually controlled it, and drove a wedge between us. Initially they tried to maintain contact, but I cut them off. If they know Chris and I aren’t together, they haven’t reached out. Someone has to be the adult in this situation. So far it hasn’t been me. I’ve masked my pain with partying and an endless parade of inappropriate men, like Levi.

Perhaps that’s why I haven’t contacted them. I don’t want them to see that I haven’t learned my lesson, and I’m still making bad choices when it comes to my love life. Maybe the guys I’ve been with since haven’t beaten the crap out of me, but I’ve also never let them get comfortable enough in our relationship to take that extra step.

My family would disapprove of Levi because of his cocky brashness and his immaturity. They never liked any of my choices when it came to boyfriends, and for good reason. It pains me to admit they were right all along. I make bad choices, and it’s time I forget about guys and work on myself for a while. This endless parade of men in my life since Chris masks my pain and loneliness, but they don’t fix my problems. Only I can do that by facing them rather than avoiding them. I’m running from Chris’s ghost by continually picking men who are safe as far as my heart.

Until Levi.

The subject of my thoughts clears his throat, reminding me that while I’m off daydreaming, he’s still standing there.

“Oh, sorry, what did you say?” My cheeks burn with embarrassment, and I’m immensely grateful he can’t read my mind.

“I said keep it up. Great meal. Are we going to have your famous bread for lunch?”

“Oh, yes, absolutely. In fact, I’d better get prep started. Lunch sneaks up pretty quickly.”

He lingers a moment longer, as if he has more to say, but I don’t, so I walk away.

An hour later, I put the last of several loaves of bread in the oven. Celeste strolls in as if she owns the place.

I glower in her direction before pretending she’s not there. Milo makes himself much smaller in the presence of Celeste. He’s scared to death of her, and I wonder what she’s done to garner such a reaction from this harmless, shy kid. Maddie breaks into a huge smile but continues her work.

“Do you need something?” I don’t care if I sound rude because she only deserves rudeness.

“They’re raving about your breakfast.”

“You don’t seem too happy about my getting praise.”

“I don’t fucking care. You mean nothing to me.”

“Really? Then why are you attempting to sabotage me?”

“Don’t blame me for your stupidity.”

My hackles are up, and I’m ready for battle when Rose enters. Celeste’s belligerence fades to that sickeningly syrupy smile I can’t stand.

“I’ve been hearing good things about breakfast this morning. Keep it up. I’ll be honest, ladies, I was getting a little nervous at the feedback I heard previously. I explicitly told the two of you to work together, and the results have caused me some concern. I haven’t said anything because I’ve been hoping the two of you would work it out, and you have.” Rose beams, unaware of the tension between Celeste and me.

“Yes, I’ve been attempting to advise Juniper, and this morning she finally followed my advice. I’m confident we can move on from here and have a profitable working relationship.”

I’m pissed. That’s not the truth, and she knows it, which is why she’s smirking with glee. My first inclination is to defend myself, but getting defensive makes a person look more guilty than the one who’s causing the trouble. I’d be wise to stick to my guns and let Celeste do herself in.

“Happy to hear it. Keep up the good work both of you.” Rose addresses me directly. “And Juniper, listen to this woman. She’s gifted when it comes to her job.”

“I’ve noticed,” I say drily. Rose doesn’t pick up on the sarcasm and smiles brilliantly before leaving, but Celeste knows.

“You’re a bitch,” she hisses. “And I know you’ve been backstabbing me with Levi.”

“Levi?” I pull back as if slapped. That’s not the next thing I expect to come out of her mouth. “I don’t have a fucking clue where you’re getting your information, but I haven’t seen him outside of work since we split.”

Celeste steps closer to me, so close her perfume is suffocating. “You’re a lying bitch.”

“Wrong. You are. Besides, if I am seeing him, it’s no business of yours. You don’t have a claim on him.”

“I will.”

“Please leave. I have better things to do than waste time arguing with the likes of you.”

Celeste gives me one of her infuriating, smug smirks before flouncing toward the door. She looks back to flip me off and slams into Levi’s chest where he is standing in the doorway.

“Oh, I’m sorry,” she gushes as he holds her arms to steady her. She doesn’t move away but moves in closer and clutches at his shirt.

I turn away, seething with jealousy I wish I didn’t feel. Now’s a good time to go to the back storage room for supplies. I can’t stand watching this disgusting display. I stomp off, fully aware I’m behaving like the upset ex I am.

The small space is in dire need of organizing, and it takes a long time to find what I’m looking for. I don’t hurry until my phone buzzes in my pocket to signal the bread being done. Surely, they’re gone by now.

When I return to the kitchen, Celeste is nowhere to be found, but Levi is loitering near the counter laughing with Maddie.

“Don’t you have work to do?” I glare in her direction. She narrows her gaze and snorts defiantly before turning back to her task.

“Can I help you?” I don’t disguise my impatience.

“Yeah, I can smell your bread all over this floor. Can I sneak a piece?” He’s so irresistibly cute when he’s begging, and he knows it. I journey back to the first time he used that look on me. I was naked in record time. No argument from me. I really need to be more discerning regarding the guys I sleep with.

But wait, didn’t I just swear off guys in order to work on myself, especially this new opportunity I’ve been handed as a chef?

I turn my back to him and bend down to pull the loaves from the oven. Levi makes a sound reminding me of an orgasm, and my traitorous body trembles with desire. Damn, I want him. He’s my weakness if there ever was one, but I don’t need his brand of trouble. I have enough on my own.

I feel his eyes on me, or more likely the bread. I should let it cool before slicing, but I need him gone as soon as possible. I grasp one of the loaves with a potholder and cut a few pieces. After liberally spreading butter all over them, I put the piping-hot slices on a napkin and hand them to Levi.

“I’m in heaven, and you’re my queen. Thank you. I’m going to savor every bite.”

I laugh in spite of my irritation. His blue eyes sparkle with his brand of joyous enthusiasm I once cherished. Levi is usually unserious and fun, though lately I haven’t seen much joy from him.

I look away because I fear he might see too much. He takes a bite of bread and groans with happiness.

“I owe you one.” He winks and gives me a thumbs-up.

“It’s my job.”

“And I’m glad it is.”

“I aim to please my players.”

Levi leans forward until his lips touch my ear and whispers, “I’ll be your player any time.”

I shiver involuntarily before backing off. I’m at a rare loss for words. He’s smirking as if he knows how much his presence affects me.

Talk about mixed signals. He dumps me and then flirts with me? I dismiss his comment, as flirting is as natural to Levi as skating is to a hockey player.

“I’ll see you later.” He winks, and my stupid heart does a happy bounce.

“Good luck tonight.”

“Thanks.”

And just like that he’s gone, taking a piece of me with him.