Page 41 of Ony If It’s You

Hopping up, I grabbed Lani and Granny’s hands and led them to her car. After getting them inside, I told my cousin to meet me at my crib and burnt rubber to get out of there. I was fuming the entire ride and ignoring my wife’s cries for me to slow down.

Whipping into the parking spot in front of our crib, I opened their doors to let them out of the car before heading inside. I knew Dominique would get them inside and make sure they were straight for me. I needed to put distance between me and everybody.

Going into our bathroom, I turned the water on and started to wash the blood from my knuckles and hands.

I had scrapes and cuts on my shit from either the ground or that nigga’s teeth.

When I was done, I turned the water off and grabbed the first aid kit from under our cabinet and went to the bed so I could patch my shit up.

Kehlani joined me shortly after, but I ignore her presence. That was best for the both of us. After getting my hand and shit together, I went to the closet and grabbed my gym bag. It already had all my shit that I needed inside of it, so I didn’t have to pack anything.

“Where are you going?”

Kehlani was positioned in front of our bedroom door.

“Watch out.” My eyes were hard on her, so I knew she could gauge exactly how I was feeling.

Not in the fucking mood for her ass.

“Tell me where you’re going.”

“I don’t have to tell you shit,” I spat.

“I’m your wife Javy?—”

“Yeah, you are. My very mothafuckin’ pregnant wife that had her stupid ass in the exact place that I told you not to be. Move, man.”

“I had to go back. Si left his iPad and?—”

“And you just had to ask him why he called you out of your name, right?”

“Yes!” she screeched. “I’m the mother of his children and?—”

“And my mothafuckin’ wife!” I roared. “I specifically told you to let me handle the shit, Kehlani, but you can’t fucking help yourself. You have to have a say and be involved in some shit no matter what the outcome could be.”

“Yes, I do, Javyous, especially when it comes to my baby’s daddy.”

“Word.” I smirked. “You need to go be with that bitch ass nigga then. Nurse his pussy ass back to health.”

She tried to clean it up. “I wasn’t saying it like that.”

“I don’t really give a fuck how you were saying it, I just want you to move the fuck out of my way.”

She shoved me. “No. You’re trying to leave because I was trying to handle the shit before it got too far? I knew what happened today would happen!”

“Today happened because he put his mothafuckin’ hands on you and because my fucking daughter called me crying because she was witnessing her bitch ass sperm donor put hands on her mother while her grandmother and brother tried to break it up.”

I was so close to her face and seething mad that I was sure that she could feel the heat coming from my body.

“I’m sorry, JV, I just didn’t want things to get to the point where one parent wasn’t there,” she cried. “I knew if y’all got into it, Pharaoh would either walk away from them if I didn’t leave you or you would make me keep them from him.”

“Am I a bitch ass nigga?” I asked, angling my head to the side.

“No, that’s not what I was saying.”

“Again, I don’t give no fucks what you were saying, just get the fuck out of my way.”

She eyed me before reluctantly stepping out of my way. I hated that she was crying and shit, but this time I didn’t let her tears move me. I needed space.

“You don’t think you went too hard on her, cuz?” Dominique asked. “I mean she is pregnant.”

My eyes cut to his ringing phone then back to nothing in particular in front of us. I wasn’t in the mood to deal with shit really, so I got in the car with my cousin, but I was regretting it now.

“I’m just gon’ crash at my pops’ crib,” I said, ignoring his question.

“You sure?” He briefly looked my way. “How you gon’ get back to the house?”

“I’ll cross that bridge when I get to it, I just need to clear my head for the night. I know nobody will fuck with me at his house.”

“Yeah, but do you think he gon’ be straight with that? I mean you did fire the nigga, JV.”

“Yeah mothafucka from being my promoter, not my fucking father. Just drive, Dominique, I’m not in the mood.”

I was in a bad headspace and in a very ill mood.

I didn’t want to take it out on the wrong people which was why I wanted him to shut the fuck up talking to me.

Kehlani had a nigga’s mental all fucked up.

I understood where she was coming from trying to keep the peace between me and her punk ass baby daddy, but she had to understand my angle as well.

Not only was the nigga being corny by even talking about her to the kids, but he had shit fucked up thinking he was going to disrespect her to them.

He was going to get his ass beat regardless.

Please just come back home, Javyous.

I knew just from this simple text message that she was still crying and an emotional wreck. I felt a little bad knowing that, but not enough to do what she wanted me to do. Plus, her grandmother was there and assured me that she was going to stay the night with Kehlani and the kids.

You need to calm yourself down, Kehlani. Think about the baby.

Are you thinking about the baby? Where are you going anyways?

Always thinking about my family.

Yet you’re not here with your family. Please, I’ll do whatever I need to do to make it up to you, just come home.

I will… tomorrow. We need the night away from each other.

She started to call after that message, but I declined all of her calls. I wasn’t in the mood to talk to her and I knew that if I actually heard her crying, I’d cave. It’d damn near killed a nigga to walk out when she was bawling her eyes out earlier.

The sound of Dominique’s door closing broke me from my thoughts.

I looked up and noticed that we were in front of my pops’ crib.

Reaching in the back seat, I grabbed my bag then climbed out of the car.

As I made my way inside, I saw that the door was open, letting me know Tandy was selling food.

I was a little irritated knowing that traffic was going to be in and out of the house, but I said fuck it. It beat me being home in that moment.

Without speaking, I trekked down the hall to my childhood bedroom and abandoned my bag. My pops would probably always have the room in his crib the exact way that it was because he had detachment issues although he would never admit it out loud.

His room door was cracked and the light was on, so I figured that he was in there. I could hear him and someone talking in hushed tones when I got closer.

“I have to tell him, Jerry. It’s well past time.”

That was the voice of Ms. Phyllis. What the fuck were they in there talking about?

“No, you don’t, Phyllis. The boy is grown now, it makes no sense to say anything now.”

“Whose fault is that, Jerry, huh? You promised that we would sit him down at the age of ten, but every year you had a new excuse and moved the timeframe!”

“Because it wasn’t important! He was doing fine without having a mother. Telling him would have just thrown his focus off. He grew up just fine and he’s successful.”

“That’s not fair.”

“It’s more than fair. At least you got to be there to see him grow.”

“He views me as one of your fucking concubines, Jerry. I’m his mother for Christ’s sake!”

Mother? Whose fucking mother? I didn’t even know her ass had kids.

“Phyllis, please. Javyous knows better. He may not have grown up knowing that you were his mother, but he definitely doesn’t view you as a concubine.”

My ears were ringing after hearing their conversation.

I didn’t think that it was possible to be madder than I was after dealing with Kehlani and her baby daddy, but this shit here took the mothafuckin’ cake.

Pushing the door open, I made my presence known.

They both looked like deer caught in headlights.

“J-JV,” Ms. Phyllis stammered but tried to smile to save face.

“What are you doing here?” my pops asked.

“Whose mother are you?” I asked, ignoring my pops’ question.

“I-I, um, I—.” Her voice was shaking and she looked terrified as her eyes danced between my pops and mine. “Ja-Javyous, I?—”

“Phyllis, don’t.”

“Shut the fuck up,” I growled at my pops through gritted teeth. “Answer the question, ma.” Her eyes grew to the size of golf balls. “What? That’s who you are, right? That’s what I should be calling you, right?”

“I wanted to tell you, Javyous,” she cried, finally finding her voice.

“When?” I tilted my head to the side. “When did you actually want to tell me because I can name millions of times that you fucking could have!”

She jumped at the thunderous sound of my voice. This was the first time that I had ever yelled at or gotten mad with her. She was always the person I could be gentle with and show a softer side to. She was there to talk a nigga through some shit and answer questions and shit that I had.

There were those times where I’d ask her about my mother and she always played stupid like she didn’t know shit and would always tell me to go ask my pops. Shit had me on fire.

“Baby, I wanted to, I did.” I stepped back and gently knocked her hand down when she tried to touch me. “Javyous, please.”

“Son, I—” my pop started, but when he went to stand from his chair I shoved him back down.

“Don’t say shit to me, nigga,” I spat. “How many mothafuckin’ times have I asked your ass about my fucking mama or her family?”

“JV, I?—”

“How fucking many?” I growled, cutting him off.

“I-I don’t remember, a few.” He shrugged trying to downplay the situation.

“Enough times for you to tell me she was right in my fucking face.”

“She didn’t want anything to do with you.”

“Jerry!” Ms. Phyllis screeched then looked at me. “He’s lying, I swear.”

“Is he?”

“Yes, I wanted you! Why wouldn’t I? I did what I had to do to be here with you,” she cried.

Her tears were fucking with me bad. I hated to see her crying.

“She’s lying, son. She was too busy wanting to be a hoe than to?—”

WHAM!