Page 31

31

Miller

T his is what fucking heaven feels like. If I die right now, I’d be a happy man. My tongue tangles with Spencer’s, my hands wander between her body and Lincoln’s, and apparently, Axel sucking my cock is one of my new favorite things.

Lincoln shifts his arm, moving lower on Spencer’s body, and she turns away from me.

“Code Blue.” Fuck.

Without hesitation, everyone moves back. Spencer used her safeword. Something made her uncomfortable, and I feel like shit that we pushed her to that edge.

Tucker grabs a blanket and covers her. She scoots to the top of the bed and rests against the headboard.

Tucker speaks first, the three of us looking at each other dumbfounded. “Spencer, would you like to talk to us?”

“I…he…”

Which “he” is she referring to? Fuck. This is torture. A safeword is a precaution, but I never thought we’d need to use it. I’m so fucking proud she did, but we need to figure out what we did and how to never make her feel like this again.

Tucker extends his hand, and she takes it. We may joke and call him Daddy, but he somehow always knows what Spencer needs, just like a father would.

“I have to tell you the rest of my story before we go any further.” There’s more? How could there be more? She’s been through so much.

“I didn’t just lose my daughter that day. There was extensive damage done to my entire abdomen. When they did the ultrasound and confirmed there was no heartbeat, they also found internal bleeding. I had to have a full hysterectomy. They could have tried to save some of the reproductive organs, but I didn’t want any long-term effects, so they took it all. I can never have children. I needed you all to know this before we go any further. You deserve to be with someone who can have children if that’s the future you want. I’ll understand if it is.”

Holy shit. Spencer’s been through so much. I didn’t see any scars on her. How did I not notice? My eyes flash to her abdomen, and of course, I can’t get anything past her.

“There are scars. My father demanded the best plastic surgeon, and I was diligent with my aftercare routine and everything I could do to eliminate the scarring as much as possible.”

“Smithy—”

“Don’t, Miller. I didn’t tell you this for pity. I want you to have full disclosure of the burden that comes with me.”

“No.” Everyone jumps at Tucker’s firm and demanding tone. “I will not allow you to talk down about yourself for circumstances that you couldn’t control. My desire to be with you has nothing to do with your ability to reproduce. Birthing a baby doesn’t make you more or less of a mother. There are plenty of ways to make that happen, if having children is what you still desire. I can’t speak for anyone else, but you’re enough, Spencer. I’ll take you exactly how you are. Reproductive organs or not.”

Damn. Tucker always knows what to say.

“Smithy, we have Katy. She’s more than enough of a handful for us. And if she keeps the baby, we will have him or her.”

“Dammit.” Axel is using his fingers to count, and I give him a puzzled look. “That’s a lot of fucking people. We’re going to need a bigger house.” Axel’s absurd statement makes everyone laugh, lightening the mood in the room.

“Dream Girl?” Spencer turns to look at him. Lincoln is the youngest of us, and although we haven’t talked about it, I know he would make a fantastic father. “I can tell you that I’ve always seen children in my future. I know it’s not something boys usually think about, but I’ve always imagined being a father and growing old with my kids.”

“I understand.”

“You don’t. Listen to me. I feel a bond with Katy, exactly how I feel like a father/daughter bond would feel. I can’t imagine anything being more real than that. I love that little snot but don’t tell her I said that because she’ll tease me. The only thought that scares me more than losing her is losing you. I’m in. I was in when you were just a voice on the radio. Call me a hopeless romantic. I don’t care.” Lincoln has tears in his eyes, and I want to console him, but it will have to wait.

“Hold on!” Axel’s face lights up, and somehow, I don’t think what he’s about to say will be as insightful as the rest of us.

“What’s wrong, Axel?”

“If Spencer can’t have babies, then we don’t need to use condoms.” I slap him upside the head and hear Spencer hiding her laugh behind her hand. Cautiously, I remove her fingers one by one.

“Don’t cover your laughter; I love hearing it.” Spencer’s eyes search each of our faces looking for any hint of a lie. She won’t find any. We meant every word that we said—even Axel’s excitement of unprotected sex.

“Is everyone clean?” Is she considering Axel’s question? “Well, I guess that question actually falls to you, Tucker. The rest of us get tested regularly for our jobs.”

Tucker squeezes the hand he’s still holding. “Yes, Little Miss, I’m clean. It’s been…well, let’s say it’s been a while since I’ve been with anyone, and I was tested at my last physical.”

“So it doesn’t bother any of you that I can’t carry children?”

“Nope.”

“Not at all.”

“Not me.”

“You’re enough.”

“There’s one more thing.” Please. No more things, Spencer. “Well, two. I’ve never done anal sex, and eventually, with this many partners, one or more of you are going to want to explore. We can work up to it. And two, I have a very sensitive gag reflex. I don’t mind giving blow jobs, but there won’t be any throat fucking because gagging overstimulates me, and I’d hate to kill the mood like this again.”

“You’re fucking incredible, Tails.” It would be Axel to find anal sex and gag reflexes incredible. I’m in awe at her bravery and a little tickled at her use of the word fucking. “Can we get back to the fun stuff now?”

“Oh my god, Axel, you really are like a puppy.”

“Yep. I’ll cuddle you and lick you and love you forever.” He bats his eyelashes at me and rubs against my arm.

“I said dog, not cat. Get off me.” He glances down at my semi-hard cock and smiles.

“That’s not what you were saying a little while ago.” Well, fuck. I can’t argue with that.

“Okay, children, the adults would like to play.” Tucker gingerly kisses Spencer’s knuckles and watches for her reaction. She seems receptive to his advances as he continues his line of kisses up her arm, slowly crawling up her body until he’s hovering over her. “Are you alright, Little Miss?”

She shakes her head. “No, I’m ravenous.” She wraps her arms around his neck and pulls his body down on top of hers. I’m about to reach over and grab Lincoln when I’m pushed onto my back, and Axel wraps his swollen lips around my cock. I press my head into the pillow and moan at the delicious feel of his tongue.

“Hey Fireball, you keep making those noises, and I might think you’re trying to replace me.”

“Linc. You need to feel his fuck his mouth to understand. Shit .”

“I want to feel you, Little Miss. Can we get rid of this blanket?” She hums into his kiss and he rolls toward Lincoln to remove the blanket.

I get the first look again at her gloriously naked figure, and I want to look for the scars she told us are there but quickly decide I don’t give a fuck; she’s stunning with or without them.

“Dream Girl, you really are a sight to behold.” Lincoln runs a finger across her collarbone, and she shivers. A surge of lust courses through me seeing my boyfriend touch my…girlfriend?

“Hey, Smithy? Can we call you ours? Fuck , Axel. Give me a second.” He chuckles as he pops off me. “I want to shout it from the rooftops that you’re ours, but if you’re not comfortable with that, I’ll silently lust after you from the shadows.” Her eyes pan the room and see the hope shining on everyone’s faces.

“There are a lot of you and only one of me. Society doesn’t always accept polyamorous relationships. Are you alright with accepting criticism?”

I brush my thumb across her cheek and kiss her lips gently. “I’m happy to call everyone in this room mine.” I look up at Tucker, still hovering over Spencer. “Even this guy. He’s not all that bad.”

“Watch that mouth, Bruiser.” I give him a mischievous grin, letting him know I’m aware of exactly what I’m saying.

“Then shout it from the rooftop if that’s what you need to do.”

“Yesssss. I have a girlfriend!” Axel fist pumps the air, and I can’t help but chuckle at what a goofball he is. He grabs my cock and shoves me entirely into his mouth until I hit the back of his throat. I flop back on the bed with a loud moan.

“Fuck! Smithy, you don’t have to worry about your gag reflex. Apparently, Axel doesn’t have one. He’s got you covered.”