Page 33 of Mutual Obsession (Rivals of Blackthorn #2)

I can tell by his expression that this isn’t going to be good, and when he takes me into this sterile-looking room, with nothing except two chairs, a small coffee table, and a box of tissues, it confirms my suspicions.

In the politest, most gentle way he can, the doctor destroys me.

“I’m sorry to be the one to tell you this, but the tests we undertook today have confirmed that, unfortunately, your mother is brain dead.

Our machine is breathing for her right now, which is currently the only thing keeping her alive.

Even if she were to start breathing for herself, there’s no neurological function, meaning her brain is already dead. ”

The words echo around my head, and no matter how many times I hear them, they don’t get easier. “What… I mean, what does that mean, Doctor?”

“It means she will not survive. We’d like to do more tests on her in four hours’ time, but if they’re the same—which we’re almost certain they will be—we’ll discuss the possibility of taking her off life support.

Until then, you have to be aware, if she deteriorates on her own, we won’t intervene with any life-saving measures. Do you understand?”

I nod, although I’m not sure I do, so I clarify with him just to be sure.

“The only reason she’s not dead already is because you’re still breathing for her.

If she fails the next set of tests, I have to decide if I want to turn the machine off and let her die, or keep her on it, knowing her brain is already dead.

“But there’s a chance she might not make it to the next set of tests, and if that’s the case, you’re going to let her die. You won’t perform CPR on her. That sound about right?”

“Yes,” the doctor says, giving me a sad smile.

I let out a breath that turns into a sigh. “I better go let my family know. Will you update me once you’ve completed the tests, please?”

The doctor reaches out with his hand to shake mine, offering his condolences. “Of course,” he says. “I really am sorry about your mother.”

I don’t know what else to say to him, so I shake his hand and leave. I walk into Mum’s hospital room, and this time, when I look at her, my heart breaks.

I don’t see the woman who ruined her life with drugs. I see the fierce, loving woman who raised me, who loved and protected me. She’s had a hard life, and she’s made all the wrong choices, but for a while, she was a great mum, and that’s the woman I’m losing today.

Before I can say anything to Courtney, the nurse who is looking after Mum, motions for me to come out into the corridor, looking concerned. “Security has just informed me that Bruce is back. They’re stalling him for a few minutes. What would you like me to do?”

I take in a ragged breath as I look over at where my sister is holding Mum’s hand. “We’ll go for an hour or two. Tell him that’s she’s going to die, and make sure he says goodbye, then get rid of him. We’ll be back in time for her next round of tests, and we don’t want him here then.

“If anything happens with her before then, please let me know and we’ll be straight back. I’d be grateful if security could have him gone before we return.”

She nods, a sad smile on her face as she places a reassuring hand on my arm. “I think that’s more than fair.”

I don’t tell Courtney why we have to leave until we’re back home, and once we’re in the safety of our house, I tell her everything. I hold her as she grieves for her mother, sobbing at the thought of losing her before we had a chance to save her.

No matter the awful things Mum’s done recently, there was a part of us both that was determined to bring back the mum we remembered, the one who loved and cherished us. But that chance has been taken from us, and that’s what Court is crying over.

Just over ninety minutes later, the nurse calls to tell me that Mum is deteriorating rapidly. There’s a good chance she won’t make it to the next set of tests. Once they’ve confirmed security has removed Bruce, Court and I rush to the hospital.

We make it there in time, and Courtney sits by her bed, holding Mum’s hand as she deteriorates.

I’m so fucking lost, I don’t know what to do.

I’m angry with Mum for putting us in this situation, for not caring enough about her life.

But I’m also fucking heartbroken that me and my little sister are about to become orphans.

I’ve lost count of the amount of times I’ve called Dee, frantically trying to get hold of her, hoping she can help me deal with my maelstrom of emotions. With each call that goes to voicemail, I become more lost.

Mum takes her final breath with me and Courtney by her side, and we break in each other’s arms, mourning the loss of a woman who once loved us more than anything else.

After we’ve said our goodbyes, I take Courtney home and get her settled. When I’m sure she’s asleep, I head out. Fuck waiting… Bruce has breathed his last breath.

I make it look like he took more of his stash than usual, overcome with grief at the loss of his wife. In reality, he didn’t give a shit about her.

I know I should feel something after taking my first life, but all I feel is relief. It wasn’t just about revenge—although that played a big part—his death was necessary to keep us safe.

Maximus’ phone call wakes me up the next morning. “His body was found, and nobody was suspicious. It looks like he overdosed, consumed by grief. Having him hold your mother’s photo in his hand was a nice touch,” he chuckles, and I smile my first genuine smile since her overdose.

“Thanks.”

“I’m proud of you. Keep your head down, and take care of yourself,” he says, and I want to puff out my chest at hearing his almost paternal praise. I don’t have any male role models in my life, and I never expected Maximus to become someone I can turn to, but he is.

Relief at not being caught floods my system as I hang up, but that’s when I realise I still haven’t heard from Dee. I try calling her again, but her inbox is now full, which has me even more concerned.

I spend the day with Courtney, making preparations for Mum’s funeral, but the whole time, I can’t stop thinking about Dee, and why she’s not got back to me yet.

By the next day, when I still haven’t heard from her, I go looking. Her boss at work tells me she hasn’t been there for two days, which sets my nerves on edge. After some pressure, he gives me her address, since Dee never shared it with me.

When I get there, I meet her landlord, who tells me she handed the keys to the flat back two days ago. He lets me look inside, confirming all of her things are gone. An overwhelming feeling of loss sets in when it hits me she’s really gone. She’s not just ignoring me, she’s fucking left.

Marcus rushes home from his holiday after hearing about Mum, and as soon as I see my best friend, everything tumbles out. I tell him about Bruce, and his father helping me. I tell him about Dee, how I feel about her, and now she’s gone.

Marcus looks as overwhelmed as I feel, but just as I expected, my best friend tries to help. “If you want to use all of my family’s resources to find Dee, we can do that.”

I’m not going to lie and say it’s not something I’ve considered, because I have. For the first few days, I obsessed over finding her, but then I realised she left for a reason. She didn’t care enough about me to tell me she was leaving, so why should I care enough to find her?

I shake my head, pulling on the last shred of strength I have. “I’ve spent the last few days trying to find her, when I should have been with my family. I’ve been looking for Dee when I should have been planning my mum’s funeral.

“Court is struggling, Mum’s funeral still needs sorting, and I can’t ignore my responsibilities anymore. I can’t keep searching for a girl who clearly doesn’t give a fuck about me.

“I loved her, and I thought she loved me, but obviously I was wrong. If she did, she’d never have left like this. So, fuck her. Courtney comes first from now on. I’ve got no more time for people who pretend to care about me, only to break my heart and leave me empty and alone.”

Although I’m referring to Dee, Jacob’s face flashes in my mind at the same time. How have I let two people in, only to have them both hurt me so badly?

Well, that will never happen again. I’m going to guard the broken pieces of my heart, so nobody ever gets close enough to hurt me again.