Page 15 of Mutual Obsession (Rivals of Blackthorn #2)

“I didn’t even know Mum was seeing someone new, as she knew I’d never approve of him. It didn’t take him long to get her to cut off the support system she had in place, and to stop taking the medication she needs. Instead, he got her hooked on drugs, began pimping her out, and abusing her.”

As Miles’ story goes on, he never lifts his gaze from his chips, but his anger seeps into every word. He never increases in volume, but the fury and despair is evident in the clipped way he speaks.

I don’t know his mum or sister, but my heart breaks for them and what they’re going through. I hate the idea of anyone being subjected to abuse and violence, and it takes all of my effort to focus on Miles’ story and not let my own darkness creep in.

Tears for his family fill my eyes, but I fight to stop them from falling, biting my lip as a distraction. I don’t want to pull Miles out of his story, but I want him to know that I’m here.

I reach over and wrap my arm around his back, pulling him against my side in a comforting gesture. I try to pass what little strength I have over to him. Although he doesn’t look at me, I feel his tense muscles relax under my touch as he continues with his story.

“When Mum stopped bringing in enough money to fund their habit, he turned his attention to my twelve-year-old sister, Courtney,” he says with a sneer, his face twisting in disgust.

I let out a gasp, even though I didn’t mean to, and as soon as he hears the noise, Miles turns to look at me. Some of the tears I’d been trying so hard to keep locked away have escaped and are crawling down my cheek as my heart races.

“Is she okay?” My voice is barely above a whisper, and despite having so much more I want to ask, I can’t trust my body not to betray me.

Even with my awful past, I’m suddenly grateful that the worst of it didn’t happen until I was older. I’m not sure how I’d have coped going through it as a young girl.

Miles reaches up and cups my cheek with his palm, using his thumb to wipe away the tears. Although his lips are fixed in a tight line, he pulls the corners up to give me a small smile.

“Courtney is safe. She called me before anything happened to her, and I came home straight away. She’s living with me now, and seems to be doing better than when I first returned,” he explains, before letting out an incredibly sad sigh.

“I just wish I could protect my mum, too. She’s still living with that arsehole, and is refusing all the help I’m offering her.

She’s so caught up in the drugs, she can’t see beyond them, or think rationally—particularly since she’s no longer taking her mental health medications either. I just wish I could help her.”

His honesty overwhelms me, and I hate how much I can relate to aspects of his life. But what I hate more is that I’ll never be able to share that with him. He may trust me with his secrets, but mine need to stay hidden—to keep us both safe.

Miles’ kind, caring, sweet nature only draws me to him more, and despite the awful seriousness of the conversation, I can’t help but smile at him. The love he has for his sister—and his mother, who doesn’t necessarily deserve it—shows just how much of a beautiful person he is.

“There are a lot of girls in this world that would kill to have someone protect them the way you have with Courtney. Someone who loves and cares for them so much that they’d put their happiness first.

“You may not be able to help your mum, and I’m sorry if that’s the case, but what you’ve done for Courtney will change her life.

She doesn’t have to live in fear, and she gets to be a kid again, which is a great thing.

I hate that you’ve had to sacrifice so much to do it though,” I tell him, meaning every word.

Miles leans closer and playfully nudges my shoulder with his, giving me that smile of his that makes my stomach flutter.

“I can’t complain too much. If none of that happened, I wouldn’t have come back to Blackthorn for the summer.

I would never have been in that bar, and I’d have never met you. Every cloud has a silver lining.”

I can’t help but return his smile, my heart racing when I notice him leaning in closer. He moves slowly, watching as my breath hitches and my eyes widen, whilst remaining fixed on him. He lifts his hand to cup my cheek, rubbing his thumb across it.

His voice is barely above a whisper, but I can hear it loud and clear as he asks, “Can I kiss you?”

I don’t think about my past, or how much I hate being touched. I don’t think about fear or anxiety. I don’t think about the hatred I feel for my body, or the worry that I might not do it right. I shut out all the intrusive thoughts and just live in the moment.

Nodding my head comes easily, but when he waits for me to use my voice, it becomes harder. I take a deep breath, closing my eyes as I whisper, “Yes.”

I’ve barely got the word out when I feel his lips against mine, and it’s like something out of a movie. My entire world lights up, even with my eyes closed. My body tingles, my heart races, and for the first time in forever, I feel alive.

After only a couple of seconds, Miles pulls away, my lips tingling from the absence of his. I don’t hesitate for even a moment, I wrap my hand around the back of his neck and pull him towards me. I slam our lips together, deepening the kiss in the most sinful way.

I’m not the most experienced with things like this, so I just listen to my body and follow Miles’ lead. As he sweeps his tongue along my lower lip, I open to grant him the access he’s asking for, relishing in the feel and taste of him.

My body responds how I’d expect it to, heating my core, making me crave more of his touch. As my pussy throbs, dark thoughts threaten to creep in, reminding me of the past, but instead of letting them drown me, I use Miles’ light to push them away.

When we finally pull apart, both gasping for breath, Miles has the biggest grin on his face. He looks like he’s won the damn lottery, and I can’t help but chuckle. He has this incredible ability to make me feel like so much more than I am.

Although I’m a little shy to admit it, I can’t stop the words from tumbling out. “I didn’t know it could feel like that, did you?”

Wow, could I have sounded any more young and inexperienced?

Miles lifts his hand to my cheek once more, and I lean into his warm touch. “It only does if it’s with the right person.”

There’s a moment of silence after he says that, almost like there’s sadness seeping in to what should’ve been a happy statement, but then it’s gone so quickly, I don’t have time to think anymore about it.

“I guess you must be the right person then,” I tell him, though my voice sounds slightly more unsure than I feel.

“You sound surprised?” Of course, Miles would pick up on it, and I take a breath while I decide how best to answer.

“I wasn’t really expecting this right now, or ever, if I’m being honest. I didn’t think I’d ever find someone I felt this way about,” I tell him, hoping he doesn’t ask me to elaborate on the parts I’ve left out.

Like the fact I didn’t think I was capable of liking someone after everything I’ve been through. Or that falling for someone would be unfair, given that I’m going to have to leave soon, no matter how I feel.

Miles nods, like he understands everything that’s unsaid. “Sometimes, when you’re not looking, when you least expect it, that’s when it finds you.”

Sounding more than a little insecure, I ask, “Are you okay with it, if you weren’t looking for this?”

Miles chuckles as he pulls me against his chest, wrapping his arms around me, passing all his warmth to me as he hugs me tight. “It’s the best kind of surprise. I’m really glad I met you, Dee. I really like you, and I want to keep dating you, if you’ll have me?”

I don’t know when they even formed, but before I know it, tears are rolling down my cheeks, and an uneasy feeling sits heavily in my stomach as I nod.

I’m very aware that getting in deeper with Miles is wrong, and it’ll only end in heartbreak for us both, but I can’t bring myself to walk away.

I’ve never had anything good in my life that was just mine.

I’ve also never had anyone who truly cares about me.

Knowing I have that with Miles, it’s hard to walk away from, even if I know it’s the right thing to do.

I feel like shit as the words tumble from my lips. “I’d like that, If you’ll have me?”

Miles’ bright smile only makes me feel more guilty. He uses his thumb to wipe away the tears, and I can only assume he thinks they’re from happiness, as he doesn’t say anything. Instead, he presses his lips against mine for another searing kiss that I feel all the way down to my toes.

I hate that Miles can never know the truth about who I am, or why I’m always running. He has no idea that the countdown to the end of our relationship started before it had even begun.

More than anything, I hate knowing that my feelings for Miles will only get stronger, since I can’t seem to stay away from him, and that’s most likely the case for him, too. We’re both getting in deeper, and I’m letting us, despite knowing it’s going nowhere.

Our only future is heartbreak and pain, yet I still can’t do the right thing and walk away. Miles is the light in my darkness, and I want to hold on to that for as long as I can, because when reality hits, and I hurt him, he’ll never forgive me. My world will be permanently dark without him.