Page 26 of Mutual Obsession (Rivals of Blackthorn #2)

F uck, why did I let Jake talk me into this? The words repeat in my head, as I pace in front of the mirror, not really taking in how I look. I’ve been obsessing over this coffee date for well over an hour now.

When Jake texted me to say that Miles would be joining us for coffee in the morning, I thought he was kidding, and when I realised he wasn’t, panic set in. The last time we were all in the same room together, Jake punched Miles. How can this be anything other than a horrible idea?

I’m worried Miles will spew his hateful words again, even though I’m very aware I deserve them after everything I put him through. But when he behaves like that, I struggle to see the boy he was before.

There’s also no denying that having coffee with both Miles and Jake will be incredibly confusing for me. Miles is the only guy I’ve ever truly loved, and I’ve never really gotten over him. But I can’t ignore that I like Jake too.

He’s wormed his way under my skin without me even realising, and I have no fucking clue what to do about it. While I’m undeniably attracted to him, when we’re together, there’s something missing, something holding me back.

When I learnt that Jake and Miles have a history together, I thought I’d be jealous, maybe even annoyed that Miles never said anything about it when I was with him, but I’m not—I’m intrigued.

Last night, I dreamt of the two men kissing in front of me, and it turned me on so much more than I ever thought it would. And now, I have to meet them both for coffee, hoping they don’t see all the dirty fantasies I’ve been thinking about written on my face.

We agreed to meet at a cafe near Caged, as I have work afterwards, so it’s more convenient.

I keep spare work clothes in my locker, as well as my sensible shoes, so I didn’t need to take that into account when trying to decide what to wear.

Although I’m only wearing a small heel, they’d kill my feet if I had to wear them for the whole shift.

What do you wear when you’re meeting the guy whose heart you once broke, and the man you’re currently seeing, for coffee?

I don’t think there’s a set outfit for that scenario, so I opt for a light purple sundress that shows off my curves a little more than my usual clothes.

After a glance in the mirror, I quickly add a cardigan over the top, as I’m not brave enough to show off too much flesh.

I hate drawing attention to myself, or my body.

I arrive at the cafe on time, and am shocked to find that Jake and Miles are already sat at a table in the corner. Jake is well known for being late for everything, so this must be a first.

I watch the two stupidly gorgeous men talking to each other, and for the briefest of moments, I consider turning around and running away. Before I get the chance, Jake sees me.

He stands and rushes over to greet me, his usual bright smile lighting up his face. He leans in and presses a sweet kiss to my cheek, before whispering in my ear. “You look beautiful.”

My cheeks flush as I mutter, “Thank you.”

Jake pulls back, but keeps his hand in mine. “Don’t be nervous. Miles has promised he’ll be on his best behaviour.”

At the mention of his name, I cast a glance over at Miles, and he no longer looks as relaxed as he did when it was just him and Jake. In fact, he’s glaring at where mine and Jake’s hands are clasped together.

I try to pull my hand free, but Jake just squeezes it tighter, as he drags me over to where Miles is sitting. It’s a small round table, and once I’ve taken a chair, Jake is on my right, and Miles is to my left.

“What can I get you to drink?” Jake asks. “We’ve just ordered, so I’ll quickly run and ask them to add yours to it.”

I shift uncomfortably, wincing as I say, “Are you sure? I can buy my own.”

Jake rolls his eyes. “Positive. What do you want?”

“Can I get a salted caramel latte with whipped cream, please?” I reel off the same coffee I have every time.

Jake nods and runs off to find our server, leaving me with Miles. I risk a glance at him, only to find him fighting to hold back a smile. “Your drink of choice hasn’t changed, then?”

“Never. I love whipped cream too much,” I joke.

Miles’ bright-blue eyes darken and his cheeks flush as he says, “I remember.”

My eyes widen and my own cheeks heat when I recall exactly what he’s referring to. I once licked whipped cream off his cock, before he covered me in it and returned the favour. Is he thinking about it too?

My heart is pounding so hard, I can hear the thuds echoing in my ears, and my core heats at the thought. I need to distract myself, to stop my thoughts from wandering any more than they already have.

I clear my throat, hoping my voice sounds normal as I say, “Thank you for agreeing to talk to me.”

Miles’ expression remains guarded, but he doesn’t appear to be as angry as he has been every other time I’ve tried to speak to him. “Jacob asked me to.” He says it like it’s just that simple—Jake asked, so he agreed.

“He’s a nice guy,” I say with a smile. Only a nice guy would have arranged a meeting with my ex, simply because he knew it matters to me.

“He is, but he’s still in the early stages of his recovery, so don’t do anything to jeopardise that,” Miles responds, sounding protective.

“I won’t.” I keep my voice steady, so he knows how much I mean it.

Just as I’m saying it, Jake drops into his seat, and shortly after, the server brings our drinks. We sit in silence for a few minutes, each enjoying our own drink before Jake’s long sigh breaks through the growing tension.

“Who wants to start?” he asks.

I look over at Miles and find him staring at me, both of us waiting for the other to go first. After a deafening stretch of silence, Miles asks, “Why are you using a fake name?”

I shuffle around in my seat, already feeling uncomfortable about this conversation. I may have to put my trust in someone, but telling a secret I’ve kept to myself for years is hard.

Miles misinterprets my discomfort and silence, turning to Jake with anger dripping from his words. “See, I told you this was a bad idea.”

Jake holds his hand out, as if to calm him down, but before Jake can say anything, I address Miles.

“You’re asking me to talk about something I’ve kept hidden for almost ten years.

Something that puts my life in danger every fucking day, so I’m sorry if I’m finding it hard.

If I tell you my story, it will place you both in harm’s way, and I’m not sure I can be responsible for that. ”

My voice becomes panicked as more words tumble out, and Jake lays his hand on top of mine, to help calm me down. Feeling his touch is grounding, and I focus on my breathing to keep from feeling overwhelmed.

Jake gives me a small, reassuring smile. “But if you tell us, and we can help, you can finally stop running.”

I squeeze my eyes shut and imagine a world where I don’t have to keep moving around, never letting people in. “How did you know I…”

I never told Jake about my constant moving, but I’m not surprised he worked it out.

“I can tell you move around a lot. No friends, no commitments. You don’t tell anyone where you live.

You use different names for new places, and if I had to guess, I’m sure some of the paperwork you used to get your job at Caged is high-quality fakes.

Plus, you walk like you think someone is following you.

All signs of someone who is on the run.”

Before I can respond, Miles cuts in, looking furiously at Jake. “You thought some of her paperwork was fake, and you never said anything. I now have several people I need to fire.”

Jake chuckles, shaking his head. “No, you don’t. They spotted the fakes, but I told your men that you and Marcus knew, and we're hiring her anyway.”

“You did what?” Both Miles and I shout at the same time.

Jake just shrugs his shoulders, like it’s not a big deal. “It obviously took a lot for you to come back, knowing you may not be given a warm welcome. I figured it was important, so I helped.”

Miles glares at Jake, not relenting. “We will have a serious talk about you interfering with my security team later. But, for now, we’ll deal with this.” He then turns to face me, his gaze softening slightly. “Is he right? Did you come back to see me?”

I nod, my lips pulled into a thin line. “I never forgot about you. I was working in a club called Belle’s Rose in London. Although it’s not a mafia-run club, it’s sort of known that the owner, Declan, has mafia ties.

“One night, I hear him talking to his best friend, Kian, about a meeting they’d had in Blackthorn.

Hearing the town’s name caught my attention.

Kian was laughing because Blackthorn’s leader, Marcus, and his Head of Security, Miles, had been terrified when they first met Bree, who rules over all the mafia families.

“At first, I thought it was just a coincidence, then I heard Marcus’ surname is Morelli, and I knew it was the guy you were best friends with.

I did a bit of discreet digging, spoke to some of the other girls that work there, and I found out you were the Miles from the story.

The boy I knew is now part of the mafia. ”

“I wouldn’t say Bree terrified me,” Miles grumbles, and Jake throws his head back and laughs.

Out of everything I just told him, that’s the part he focuses on?

Jake wipes at his eyes as his laughter dies down. “She should terrify you. She scares the shit out of me.”

Miles glares at Jake before he turns back to meet my gaze, his face softening more this time. “So you came because you found out about my connections?”

I let out a long sigh, suddenly feeling really bloody tired. “Honestly, Jake is right. I’ve been running for as long as I can remember, and I’m exhausted. I can’t get close to people, as I know it won’t be long before I need to leave them.

“I broke all the rules with you, and leaving almost killed me. I thought about coming back so many times, about telling you the truth, but I loved you too much to put you in danger, particularly as you were caring for Courtney, too.

“I’m sick of running, and I’ve been hoping that soon there’ll be a way for all of this to end. So, when I heard about your connections, I thought this might finally be my chance to get free, to stop hiding.

“I want to live a normal life. I know it’s too late for us, and you have every right to walk away right now, but I’m really hoping you won’t. I think you might be my last hope.”

As each word spills out, I feel a little freer. I’m finally telling him all the things I hid from him when we were together, and even though it’s far too late, I’m still glad I’ve got it out.

Miles sits in silence, no doubt contemplating everything I just said, but Jake has questions. “Did you not know who Marcus and Miles were back then?”

I shake my head, as Miles does the same, although he remains quiet. “No, I never met Marcus, as he was on holiday with you. I thought Miles was a student who’d just finished university, and was having one final summer before getting a job. We didn’t really discuss anything more.”

To an outsider, it probably sounds strange to hear about all the things we never discussed, and the secrets we kept, whilst still maintaining we were falling for each other. But unless you were there, feeling what we were, you’ll never understand.

“I think it’s clear there was a lot we didn’t discuss,” Miles snaps, sounding irritated. Whilst it didn’t bother him at the time, it sounds like it really does now.

I nod, unable to keep the sadness from seeping into my expression. Jake snaps me out of it when he points out, “But you still fell in love.”

Hearing the word, my stomach flutters, and I remember all the times Miles showed me how much he loved me. We may never have said the words to each other, but our actions said what our lips didn’t. “I didn’t know I could love someone, or that it’d feel as amazing as it did.”

When I look over at Miles, to see if he’s remembering it the same way I am, I find his bright-blue eyes shining as he smiles at me. For the first time in seven years, I’m looking at the boy I fell in love with.

“Is this story the reason you left without a word?” Miles asks.

I nod slowly, wondering how to phrase this without it coming out wrong.

His grin has me opening up the way I should have all along.

“Yes, and if you can’t help me, it’s the reason I’ll have to keep on running.

I can never stay in one place for long, so I’ll need to leave again in about a month, two at the most.”

“You can’t leave,” Jake blurts out, his gaze frantically flicking between me and Miles.

Miles places his hand over Jake’s spare one, as his other is still laced with mine. His touch grounds Jake the way Jake’s did for me, and I can’t help but smile. “Why don’t you tell us your story, from the beginning, and we can go from there?” Miles says.

Nausea ripples my stomach and acid floods my throat as I put my trust in the two men sitting beside me.

Although I’m fucking terrified, and I may doom them both to the same dangerous life that stalks me, I hold on to the little shining ray of hope that the boy I never stopped loving, and the man who is winning over my broken heart, may finally save me from the nightmares I’m running from.