Page 53 of Mate

“I’m going, I’m going .”

“I’m sorry about what happened at the office,” Layla tells me as soon as we’re in Koen’s room.

“Don’t worry about it. Let’s not blame each other for stuff we did at scalpelpoint.”

She smiles, but her eyes are shiny. “I was so out of it, I couldn’t sound the alarm, and— ”

“Believe me, you did everything you could. I would hug you to underscore my point, but the idea of touching anyone who isn’t— Well, I’d rather not. Let’s do it after the injection.”

Layla bites her lower lip. “I don’t have good news for you, Serena.”

Not being called Eva feels so damn nice, the words don’t immediately register. Then they do, and ice pools in my stomach. “What do you mean?”

“You are too close.”

“Too close to . . . ?”

“Your Heat.”

She’s joking, right? “It’s not even a full twenty-four hours after we were planning to do the injection.”

“I know. In all honesty, I’m starting to wonder whether an injection this morning would have been effective, given how fast you’re progressing.”

“You haven’t even checked me yet. How can you tell?”

“Your scent, for one. Your pupils are permanently dilated. Your resting heartbeat is much quicker than yesterday, your breathing is shallow, and . . . When have you last eaten or drank?”

“I don’t know. Probably . . .” This morning? No. Not really. Yesterday? I must have, but—

“Are you thirsty? Hungry? Should I get you something?”

I quickly shake my head. “No, thank you.” Shit. Shit . “Is it normal?”

“For a Were on the edge of Heat? Absolutely. Once it starts in earnest, you’ll have to remember to drink often, or you’ll dehydrate soon, and that’ll make the post-Heat days a nightmare. We brought over supplies— ”

“We?” A wave of horror twists my guts. “Does everyone know?”

She cocks her head. “At this point, no Were of reproductive age would miss it.”

I let myself fall back on the mattress. Maybe I could grab a fork from the kitchen, fall upon it, and encounter a swift and merciful death.

“That’s not a bad thing, Serena. Your scent is attractive to Weres right now.”

Probably better to just make out with a piranha and hope he’ll eat me.

“It’s a testament to the Alpha’s trust in his seconds and his pack members that he’s allowing them inside the cabin to be in his ma— in your presence, so close to your Heat. And a testament to how much they respect him and you— ”

“What if I take the shot anyway?” I sit up. “Why not try, at least?”

“It could make your Heat last longer or be more painful. Worse, it could inflict long-term damage to your reproductive system.”

“What if I’m willing to take the risk?”

“Serena.” She pins my eyes with hers. Listen carefully , they say.

Because I’m in charge . In her own way, she’s as scary as Koen.

Scarier. “No self-respecting healthcare professional will give you that shot right now. What I can give you, however”— she turns to her bag and pulls out a small packet— “is this.”

It’s so unsubstantial, as I hold it up to the light, I wonder if she’s joking. “What is it?”

“Contraceptive pills.”

I blink. “What? I can’t even . . .”

“We don’t know that for sure. These will prevent pregnancy. If you would like that, take them after your Heat is over.”

“How will I know— when is the Heat over?”

“You’ll know, believe me.”

I don’t want to believe her. Or to know. “Why would I need contraceptives? Is there some kind of asexual reproduction . . . I can’t get pregnant just by having a Heat, right?”

She stands. Sets a small card on Koen’s nightstand. “You have my number. For any question, call me. Anytime.”

“Layla, I don’t understand.”

“If I don’t answer, Sem will. But for the most part, it’ll be a very intuitive process— ”

“Layla.”

At last, she stops. She glances in the direction of the door. Then murmurs, “I won’t tell a soul. And neither will any of the seconds.”

“I . . . Why does it sound like people have been talking about this?”

She swallows. “I know this embarrasses you, but it’s not . . . We are not Human, Serena.”

We are not Human.

“We don’t feel like you do when it comes to our bodies. I know every person in that room. I know Koen. And I really . . . I wouldn’t have wanted this for him.”

Who else has told me these very same words? Ah, yes. Brenna. Of course. “It’s a common feeling,” I say flatly.

“I don’t mean you . It’s clear that he’s so happy with you— ”

“Happy?” Laughter bubbles out of me. “The dude who constantly looks like he’s a hairbreadth from slashing every tire in the universe?”

Layla shakes her head. “When I heard that he had found his mate, and that it was unreciprocated, my first thought was that it was a blessing in disguise. I knew from the very start that Koen would put the pack first. It’s always been his priority, after all.

It would be a terrible choice to make for any Alpha— either renounce his pack for his mate or renounce his mate for his pack.

But in your situation, if he chose the pack, you wouldn’t suffer from it.

You didn’t want him, anyway. That made things much easier for him.

” She swallows. “But this— your Heat, what you are about to experience . . . It changes everything. Koen is now being asked to choose between respecting the covenant or guaranteeing his mate’s well-being.

And if you need him, he’s never going to say no. ”

“I never asked him. I didn’t— ”

“Do you really think you need to ask him, Serena?”

I fist the comforter. Clench my jaw shut.

“The thing is . . . We need him, too. The Northwest needs Koen precisely because of everything I just told you. And that’s why I’m not going to tell a soul.

” Her lips, I realize, are quivering. “No one will ever know where he’ll spend the next few days.

He’ll be yours for a while, Serena. But after, you must return him.

So think of it as a loan.” One last, sad smile.

“What I always tell my daughter is that all lies come to light. Let’s hope that I’m wrong. ”

A few minutes later, the cabin falls silent. Everyone leaves— except for Koen.