Page 27 of Love Is a War Song

“Why don’t you let me show you a thing or two about cowboys?” he whispered in my ear. I shivered, not from pleasure but revulsion. His cheap cologne was suffocating and all the beers in my belly, now with the gallon of water I just chugged, was threatening to come back up.

I closed my eyes for a moment, taking a few deep breaths to will away the nausea. When I opened them again there were two cowboys. Great.

“Do you have a twin?” I asked.

He laughed. “You could use some air. Come with me and I’ll take care of you.” He pulled me closer to him and wrapped his free arm around my back, trying to lead me toward the exit.

My ankle screamed in protest as I rooted myself in that spot.

“I’m not going anywhere with you. My friends are coming back.”

“I haven’t seen you with any friends tonight. Don’t play hard to get, I’m just trying to help.” His pace was fast, and my ankle throbbed as I struggled to stay upright and not fall on my face.

“Leave me the fuck alone!”

It was loud. My head was spinning, and it sounded like the DJ turned the volume up louder and the crowd was loving it. I frantically turned my head, trying to find a familiar face. It was dark and hazy, and everyone was wearing a damn cowboy hat—it was impossible to find anyone I knew.

The men’s and women’s bathrooms were right by the exit. I found my new tactic.

“Wait, I really need to pee. Did you see all the water I just drank? It hit bottom, man. I have a bladder the size of a thimble. I need to make a pit stop.”

“Don’t worry, we’re just taking a quick breather, and we’ll head back in. Just need some air.” The big burly cowboy just kept pulling me toward the exit.

“Do you really want me to pee in your truck? Think of your seats!”

That stopped him. Thank the powers that be that this man cared more about his upholstery than being a decent human. I had been in a few sticky situations in Los Angeles and New York, but never to this extent.

He grunted as he released me.

“Is there a problem here?” Lucas’s voice thundered over the loud music, and I’d never felt so relieved. He stepped in between me and the Evil Cowboy.

“Why don’t you mind your own damn business? My girl was just going to the bathroom and then we were leaving.” The Evil Cowboy stepped closer to me.

“This woman is my business.” Lucas didn’t so much as raise his voice—no, he lowered it to a menacing growl, and it was so much worse than a shout.

The hair on my arms raised and gooseflesh covered my skin.

“You his girl?” Lucas turned to look at me; his eyes were charged.

It wasn’t quite anger that I saw. It couldn’t be jealousy over this poor excuse of a cowboy holding me hostage.

“I’m only one person’s girl.” I cocked my brow and smirked.

Lucas raised his eyebrow.

“Oh yeah, and whose girl is that? This guy?” The Evil Cowboy pointed his thumb at Lucas.

“No, I’m Lottie Fox’s girl.”

The Evil Cowboy’s face blanched.

“Seems you heard of my grandmother.”

Evil Cowboy started backing away, arms raised. “Look, there has been a misunderstanding. I don’t want no trouble. Lottie and my family go way back. Legend is she shot my uncle in the ass with an arrow. Please don’t tell her about this.”

“I suggest you leave then.” Lucas’s voice was pure ice. We watched the man turn back toward the dance floor, looking for some other girl who would give him less trouble no doubt.

“Thank you for stepping in. I think I need to get some air.” I took a step on my bad ankle—through the confrontation, I forgot all about my pain. I palmed the wall to steady myself; the floor looked like waves with how it was moving. I drank too much.

“Whoa there.” Lucas’s voice was in my ear as he swooped down and scooped me into his arms. I clamped my eyes shut, waiting for the dizziness to end. He smelled like sweet tobacco and leather; it calmed me. I took a few more deep breaths.

Lucas started walking while clutching me to his chest. The cool night air hit me, and I felt immediate relief. The cloying hot air of the bar and loud music were too much for me in my current state.

He made to put me down.

“No!” I was like a cat and sank my nails into his shirt. “Don’t put me down. I like being up here.”

He only chuckled in response, but I thought I felt his arm muscles flex beneath me. That had to have been all the alcohol that went to my head.

I lifted my face from his chest and met his eyes. His storm cloud gray eyes were the most beautiful things I had ever seen. The light of the neon sign behind us reflected in them and it looked like he had a whole galaxy swirling in his eyes. I shook my head to snap myself out of it.

“You can put me down now. It was very heroic of you to step in. Lottie would be happy to know you rescued her granddaughter,” I said, my voice small. Did he only do it because of his obligation to Lottie? Or was he starting to feel what I felt?

“I’d do it for any woman, and more if I needed to.

Consent matters. Did you want to go off with him?

” Lucas’s gorgeous eyes were expressionless.

“I wouldn’t judge you…” He looked away from me then.

Even in my drunken state, I knew the answer was important; he cared.

His answer was a great one—Lucas was a good guy—but I felt a little deflated and it was irrational. I blamed it on the alcohol.

“Of course not. He wouldn’t leave me alone at the water dispenser.”

Lucas pinched his lips together and nodded once as we stood beneath the overhead lights of the honky-tonk. We could have been in a field standing under stars for all that it mattered, because Lucas was really looking at me.

Soft music from a speaker was playing above us, a slow country ballad I’d never heard before. It was nice. The man’s voice was deep, as most male country singers’ voices were, but the melody was beautiful and catchy and the harmonies sounded like there were two men singing.

“Who sings this?”

“Brooks & Dunn.”

“I like it.” I smiled at him. “Did you mean what you said?”

“Yeah, I’d beat the shit out of any man trying to take advantage of a woman.”

I laughed. “No, not that. I mean I do believe you about that, but I meant the other thing.” I started swaying my head and shoulders to the music. Lucas was stone-still, but after a moment, when I leaned into him a bit, his body seemed to naturally move with mine.

“What other thing?”

“The thing you said about me being your business?”

“Yeah. I meant it.”

“Why am I your business, Lucas? You don’t even like me.”

His arms looped around my lower waist as he looked deep into my eyes, and we swayed together to the song.

“I don’t have to like you. Lottie said I had to watch out for you.”

It was all the beer making my head and heart do weird things.

And my stomach. God, the swaying was a bad idea.

I wasn’t sure what I expected Lucas to say, or hoped, rather.

Of course he cared only that I was in one piece because his employer, my grandmother, ordered him to.

From the second I met him, he made it clear he didn’t like me and never would.

What was wrong with me that I started forming some sort of crush on this man and hoping he did too?

It had to be because he was the only handsome, young, unattached man in my vicinity.

Fuck. Maybe I should have found a casual hookup in there, because this was embarrassing. And he was still holding me as we danced to the music.

I pried my hands apart from around his neck and used my palms to push away from his chest.

“Whoa there, careful.”

I stepped back and my heel got stuck in a crack and I rolled my bad ankle. The ugliest grunt came out of me.

Lucas used his hands to steady me, but I wobbled away, needing space.

“I’m fine. I just need a minute. I’ve had a little too much to drink, but the air is helping.

” I turned away from him. I couldn’t bear to look at him right now.

I was tired from a stressful week and when I drank too much, I tended to get emotional.

If I looked at him right now, after so much irrational disappointment, I’d cry and only embarrass myself more.

I needed to breathe and sober up. I looked at our surroundings. The parking lot was full of mostly trucks. Old trucks, new trucks, lifted trucks, low trucks. Trucks, trucks, trucks, trucks. Oh wait, I spotted one sedan. It looked like an old Camry. But then there were more trucks and SUVs.

Standing in the parking lot were a couple groups of guys smoking and chatting among all the vehicles.

Everyone here belonged. But me? I stuck out like a sore thumb.

Of course Lucas wouldn’t even start to like me in any romantic way.

We had a business arrangement and people weren’t supposed to mix business and pleasure.

It was absurd that I would conjure up this fantastical crush, as if the cowboy in the middle of nowhere was the only man in the world who would see me, get me, love me.

Our little hideaway from the world. That didn’t happen for people like me.

I was too open to public scrutiny and our lives were too different.

Plus, I was canceled. Who wanted to attach themselves to my walking mess of a life?

It was the beer and that was that. In the morning, none of these thoughts and feelings would be there.

“You okay?” Lucas asked.

I did the only thing I could to hide myself and make him see the Avery he hated—the dumb, shallow superstar from California—to get things back to how they were. “No, I’m not okay. I’m drunk and you don’t even have In-N-Out here.”

I turned around and he had his hands in his pockets, kicking a cigarette butt with the toe of his boot.

“We got other food.”

“Yeah, yeah, yeah. I’m going to go find me a nicer cowboy to buy me some.” I started walking around Lucas, back to the entrance.

“You aren’t going back in there, princess.” He was using his nickname for me again. There. I fixed it. It was how it should have always been. Lucas was not my friend, and he most certainly was not my boyfriend.

“Look at all the bumper stickers, Lucas. It’s a free country. I can do what I want.”

“You can when you’re sober. Don’t put yourself in danger. C’mon, some ladies are selling meat pies by the gate over there. Let’s get some to soak up the alcohol.”

I followed his line of vision, and sure enough, there were two women sitting in camping chairs with a cooler on a folding table.

It looked too far away for my ankle, and I whimpered.

“Lean on me.” Lucas circled his arm around my waist, and he slowly and gently led me to the food stand.

“Two, please,” Lucas said, handing them some cash, and the old women gave us each a foil-wrapped item. It was weighty in my hand.

“Mvto,” Lucas said as he unwrapped his and took a big bite. He nodded for me to do the same.

Flavor swirled in my mouth as I bit through the flaky pastry outside and into the ground-meat mixture. It was good.

“Oh my god,” I moaned. I finished it in three quick bites.

Lucas’s hand tightened around my waist as we walked slowly back across the parking lot. “Let’s get you home.”

“There you two are!” Davey’s loud voice rang through the night air.

“We’re gettin’ ready to go. You comin’?” Lucas asked Davey.

Davey held the door open and Mary Beth came out.

“No, he ain’t. He’s comin’ home with me,” Mary Beth proudly asserted through a giggle.

“Lady’s orders.” Davey smiled as he shrugged.

“You seen Red?” Lucas asked.

“He said he would see himself home.”

“Aight then, we’ll see ya Monday.” Lucas lifted his chin in farewell. Davey reciprocated. Mary Beth jogged over to me.

“Avery! It’s so nice to meet you. I’m sorry I didn’t get to talk to you, but Davey says you’re great and will sing at our wedding?”

“I’m happy to. Davey is like family.” I smiled and really meant it.

“I can’t wait to tell everyone. Our wedding is gonna be the talk of the town. You’re coming to the tournament in a couple weeks, right?”

“I hadn’t even heard of it. Tournament for what?”

“Stickball.” She looked at me like it was obvious. “Lucas, you didn’t tell her about it? We’re all going, you have to go.”

“Okay, then I’ll go.”

“You will?” Mary Beth clapped in excitement.

“Yeah, I mean I don’t have much else going on here.”

“Great, so I’ll see you there and we can chat and hang out more.”

“I’m looking forward to it.”

“Well, we gotta get goin’. I haven’t seen my man in a whole week. See ya.” She hugged me. It wasn’t one of those fake, uppity hugs with air cheek kissing that everyone in Hollywood does. It was a real, earnest squeeze.

I liked her.

“Guess it’s just you and me,” I said to Lucas.

He blew out a breath. “C’mon then.”

“What’s stickball?” I asked on wobbly legs as he led me to the truck.

“It’s a really old game we like to play.

” His tone was patient, even the way he held me up by the arm to get me to the vehicle was careful.

We arrived at the truck in no time and he opened the passenger door to usher me in.

I lifted my leg to climb in, but got no purchase with these damn heels and I slipped back down.

Warm, steady hands gripped my hips and I was lifted into the truck as if I weighed no more than a feather. I turned to thank Lucas, but his face was too close. My lips brushed his and he reared his head back.

“Oh my god, I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean to do that. I just wanted to thank you, oh my god.”

“It’s fine,” he grunted.

“It was an accident.” How did that happen? I felt sick.

He pinched his lips together and nodded. He started to close the door.

“Lucas, wait—” That was the only warning I could give before I bent over and threw up the entire contents of my stomach onto the dirt ground—and Lucas’s boots.

When I was done, I looked up to Lucas’s shocked face.

I used the back of my hand to wipe my mouth. “I’m so sorry.”

He closed his eyes, took a step back, and closed the door without a word.

Through the window I yelled, “I’ll buy you new boots!”