Page 3 of Look My Way (Bloody Desires #1)

Liam

I don’t know what possessed me to give the stranger a wrong name, but it came flying out before I could stop it.

Lex is a character in my stories. A better version of me.

He’s everything I wish I could be. Strong, carefree, and beautiful.

My illness, along with other disasters life has thrown my way, has prevented me from being those things before I could even have the chance to be.

I go from one bad situation only to enter another, and today, giving my real name felt like too much of a risk.

Daniel would know I left the house again if he ended up being one of the cops at the scene.

He says it’s not good for me . . . that I need rest. His overly strict rules are only there to help me.

To help us. It’s what he keeps telling me, but I’m not sure I believe it anymore.

My phone buzzes as I enter our house, and it’s my editor.

Rick : I need that manuscript in one week. The publisher won’t allow anymore push backs.

Me : I know, and you’ll have it. I’ve been sick. I told you that.

Rick : Then maybe this isn’t the job for you. Perhaps you should leave the spot open for someone who can handle it.

My hand squeezes around my phone. I’ve asked to work with a different editor many times, but I was told Rick is already too familiar with my writing for me to switch, and I’m two books into a series.

Supposedly no one has the time right now to read over the first book or take on another author.

Everyone’s up to their elbows in manuscripts. There’s always some reason.

Sighing, I start to write back and then delete it.

There’s no point in responding. It never gets me anywhere.

The only thing that will is finishing my book.

Feeling worn down and exhausted from my trip out, I walk to the kitchen to fix myself a cup of coffee.

The front door opens and closes, drowning out the liquid trickling into the glass mug.

“Daniel?” I call out, examining my appearance in the glass of the cabinets. Dirt splotches scatter across my cheeks and my hair is mussed, going in every direction. I quickly run my fingers through the thin strands to flatten them, and I rub the dirt from my face with my shirt.

Heavy footsteps trail behind me, Daniel’s boots clacking against the tile and his keys jiggling from his belt. “Hey, baby. Finish working for the day or just getting started?”

“Just getting started. Woke up late and had lunch. Now I’m grabbing some caffeine for an extra boost.”

Wrapping my fingers around the mug, I stay facing the cabinets in case I missed anything that would give away that I’d left the house.

I’d wanted to enjoy a different environment for once, while I went over my outline, and boy did I get way more than I bargained for.

I leaped in front of a damn car today to save a man I didn’t even know.

He was as shocked as I was when he looked at me with those wide brown eyes, and the pink scars running from his cheek to his mouth added to his good looks rather than taking away from them.

How does someone even get an injury like that?

He must walk in front of a lot of cars without looking.

I shake away the thoughts and tense when Daniel lays a hand on my shoulder.

“I’ll let you get to it, then. I only came by to see if you were feeling better from yesterday.

” He presses a kiss to my cheek, his warm lips no longer having the same effect they once had.

I’ve tried to leave before but he always finds me and drags me back, reminding me how much I need him.

My insurance will run out soon, and that’s why I said yes when he asked me to marry him.

I’m also afraid of being alone. Who else would want someone like me?

“I’m doing much better. How’s work?” I finally turn around to face him, my heart pounding in my chest as he stares at me intensely, like he’s dissecting me from the outside.

He’s always looking for something to disapprove of lately.

I don’t know if it’s the stress of the job or because he’s saving his good side for someone else now.

I see the way his partner looks at him, as someone who’s had a taste before and can’t wait for another.

Why he bothers keeping me around is beyond me. I think he gets off on controlling me, on being the stronger one, on being needed. I once confused it for him wanting to take care of me, so I leaned into it. Into his welcoming arms that recently feel like chains around me, cold and weighing me down.

“It’s going. A little slow, but I’m sure it’ll pick up soon. I’m going to grab some food and head back. You sure you don’t need me to stay again?”

“I’m sure.” I didn’t need him yesterday either, but he convinced me I did in my fatigued state.

I was too tired to argue and allowed him to carry me into the shower and bathe me.

My skin still burns from the roughness of the towel whenever he scrubbed too hard.

It was his version of caring for me while reminding me of what he’s capable of if I make the wrong move.

“Okay. I might be home a little late again. Jared needs help moving furniture from his mom’s place into storage.”

“Okay. I’ll start dinner two hours later just in case.”

“Thanks, baby. Make enough for Jared too. I’m sure he’ll be hungry by the time we’re done.”

Oh, I’m sure too. Jared’s his partner, the guy whose cologne he smells of a lot lately.

I only know it because it wrapped around his strong cedar and spice scent like a cloud last time he brought Jared over for lunch.

I cooked us all food and got to see him constantly glance at my fiancé from across the table.

When I asked if something was going on between them, Daniel said I was being paranoid and blamed my delusions on my lack of sleep.

Everything is either in my head or my fault.

He’s right, though, it’s not like I have any proof.

Only my own insecurities causing me to see things that aren’t really there.

Daniel loves me, I know he does, and I have to keep trusting in everything he’s done for us to live the life we do.

He’s the reason I wake up in a nice house every day, that I landed the writing career I have, and he’s marrying me sooner than planned so I’m able to get on his insurance plan.

He’s been there for me more than my own family, and he didn’t abandon me like all my friends did.

Daniel stuck around when I was at my worst, and that’s the reason I always try hard to see past his bad days.

“Will do. Have a good rest of your day,” I finally say, pretending to sip from my cup.

Stepping closer, he presses a kiss to my cheek. “I’ll try, but it won’t be easy without you. After dinner, we’ll stay up a little later than usual and watch that movie you’ve been wanting to see too.”

“Can’t wait.” I shoot him a smile.

He runs his hand along my hip possessively while kissing me again. “Fuck, I love you. You know that?”

“Yes.” I force a smile. “Now go before you’re late.”

He chuckles, running his nose along my neck. Can he smell the diner on me? “See you later.” He squeezes my ass gently and grabs a container from the fridge before heading out. I sink against the counter, breathing better when the front door closes and locks behind him.

He didn’t know I was gone. He couldn’t tell.

I was too careless today. He’s right about the risks I take leaving the house, especially when I’m suffering from bad migraines to the point it could affect my eyesight.

He only gets angry when I give him reasons to worry.

It’s my fault for triggering his bad temper.

I down the rest of my coffee and set the mug in the sink.

Heading for my office, I take my laptop with me and dive into a life that’s not mine—a simpler one.

Not meaning to do it, I write the stranger from today into my story, and instead of Lex fleeing right after the accident like I did, he stays and lets the man he saved thank him by buying him a drink.

I’m not sure if it’s because what happened today makes for a great plot line and meet cute, or if it’s because for whatever reason I can’t get the way he looked at me out of my head.

I wasn’t the weak, sick man Daniel sees every day. I was the man who was capable enough to save someone else’s life. And the way the man looked at me, in awe and gratitude, made it hard to walk away because I knew I’d go back to feeling like nothing but a burden once I was back home.