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fifty-one

I stared into eternal darkness, eyes glazed over and unfocused. Time was a winter night, stretching on and on. My candle had gone out and I no longer knew if it was night or day. My stomach grumbled angrily at me. How long would it take Rafael and Louis to find me? What if they’d been captured too?

My mouth was parched, my lips chapped. I tried to ignore the relentless thirst as dread crept in.

With no magic, no light, I felt completely upside down.

I inhaled faster and faster until I had to lay my cheek against the cold stone floor to avoid the spins.

Hours passed and still no one came. I faded in and out of consciousness, wondering how long it would take for me to die.

I heard my mother’s voice. “S tay strong, Goldie. You’re not alone.”

I repeated her words over and over. I am not alone. I am not alone.

I am not alone. And yet, I felt more alone than I ever had.

I was beginning to recall memories of my father, who I hadn’t been able to picture clearly for years.

Dream and reality began to blur together as fragments of another time came back to me.

It was like trying to put a smudged and shredded letter back together.

His blonde hair hung over my mother’s limp body as he shook her lifeless form, telling her to wake up.

He seemed almost convinced that she’d be able to.

Ophelia leaned down and whispered something in his ear, and then he’d simply…

left. What had she said to him? I watched him walk away, not knowing it was the last time I’d see him. He hadn’t said goodbye.

I remembered gardening with my mother with soil-covered hands.

My father teaching me to ride a horse. Playing hide and seek in the loft of the barn.

My mother's bruised cheek after a fall down the stairs.

Blood. So much blood… soaking into the hardwood.

My mother's pale, lifeless hand. Her hunched body as she scrubbed at the stained floors.

A bright light blinded me as someone entered the room.

I breathed in Galen’s smoky scent and squinted up to find him staring at me with a dead expression on his face.

He set down a plate of food and water before lighting my candle with the snap of a finger.

I didn't bother to peel myself off the floor.

“I’ve been thinking of you down here… cold and alone. This isn’t easy for me. Are you ready to forgive me?” he asked softly. I could hear the internal conflict in his voice. Some part of me felt bad for him and his warped mind.

“Don’t do this, Galen. I know you want to be good—I’ve seen it, felt it. Marry Isla and let me return to Erador. Respect what we shared and let me go. Please .” I pleaded and knelt at his feet, bowing from exhaustion rather than a desire to grovel. He stayed quiet for a moment.

“I can’t,” he said in a clipped tone. “Your magic is too powerful, and I know what you are. Only an imbecile would give that up. You are mine to claim, the Oracle said as much. Blood-bond with me. Give me your magic, open a portal for my people, then I’ll let you go.

” He squatted beside me, offering me a cup of water.

I didn't respond, afraid he might hit me or worse if I outright refused him.

“Very well.” His voice turned flat again. “Then I’ll take what I need and give you more time to consider your options, or lack thereof.” He pulled me up by my arms and I struggled against him, attempting to knee him in the groin.

He turned me, holding me firmly, as I flailed in his arms. He pressed against my backside and I panicked, becoming frantic in my efforts to evade him.

“Be still. I’m not going to force myself on you,” he said gruffly as I continued to fight.

“Well… I’m going to take your blood, but I won’t touch you beyond that… if that’s your wish.”

“It’s my wish,” I sobbed. “Don’t touch me!” I yelled, twisting, trying to bite anywhere I could. "Help! Someone help me," I cried out to the void.

He gave an exasperated sigh and walked me forward until I was pushed against the stone of the wall.

“You used to love when I took you this way,” he whispered into my ear.

“And you will again. Once my brother’s poison has left you.

But for now, this will be enough.” He brushed my hair back—kissing my shoulder, my neck.

I froze, rigid with fear, as he took a sharp intake of breath and bit down.

To my relief, it didn’t hurt. To my alarm, it made me go supine, relaxing into the rush of euphoria as I let out a humiliating moan.

The bridge linking us took away the hollow ache in my veins, allowing me to feel my magic.

I tried to call upon it as he drank from me, but it hovered just out of reach.

There was a small comfort in knowing that it was right there, waiting for me—because he couldn’t keep me cuffed forever.

I’d strike hard and fast when I got the chance.

He pulled away and left without another word and I slumped against the bed, depleted and dejected.

"Goldie," my mother's voice was urgent as it attempted to rouse me.

"What?" I groaned.

"We need to go. He's coming."

"Who's coming? We've been at this for weeks. I'm tired. Even in my dreams, I'm not allowed to rest," I snapped irritably.

"Quickly, get up. Now." She sounded so frantic that I opened an eye. We were in the loft of the barn, surrounded by blankets and piles of hay. I had a toy unicorn clutched in my hands—the one Rafael had rescued from the cave.

I sat up groggily. "Who is—"

"Quiet," Mama hushed me with a sharp whisper. "He's here."

All it took was a glance in her direction to know that she was absolutely terrified. It was enough to sober me. She was trembling, gripping my shoulders protectively with both hands. I attempted to speak again and she covered my mouth.

"Eliana…" A male's voice echoed across the barn, causing my pulse to soar. Slow, deliberate footsteps hung in the air as he sauntered directly below us. I couldn't see him, but his voice made the hairs on the back of my neck stand up. My father. We were hiding from my father.

I tried to count the days, but it was impossible without the sun and moon’s guidance.

I was almost certain that Galen had been bringing me food twice a day and taking my magic once a day.

I kept a small kernel of hope that I’d see Raf at the door, but Galen was always the one who appeared.

I was in such a dark place that I began to look forward to his visits, knowing his bite would take me to oblivion, if only for a moment.

“You’ve been here a week now,” Galen announced, jarring me from a dream of Rafael and I flying through an onyx sky.

“Only three more nights until the festival. I’ll be announcing you as my future bride at the party.

It would be convenient if you came around before then.

I don’t need you making a scene, especially with how hard Isla has been working to make this festival an occasion to remember.

She’ll be disappointed enough when she hears the news. ”

He was a sociopath.

“Your mother did a number on you,” I said through gritted teeth.

He contemplated, rubbing his jaw. “Yes… she did. But she also taught me how to get what I want. And since love doesn’t come easily to me, power shall be my beacon.

Let me remind you of the power that I wield.

” He lifted two orbs of fire into the air.

They started out amber in color before reshaping and changing hue as he juggled them back and forth.

“Orange and red flames are more than capable of burning flesh in seconds, but thanks to your magic, I now have a rainbow to choose from. I have a theory about the purple flames—I think they can leave even a healer scarred. Which body part do you like the least? We can start there. A pinky toe, perhaps? I hate to mutilate a delicate flower unnecessarily… I’m going to be looking at you for the next millennia, after all.

” He flashed white teeth at me and I almost vomited at the beauty in his smile. He was a fraud. An imposter.

“How could you burn someone that you claim to care for?” I rasped. I was terrified, but I’d withstand it. I wouldn’t let him scare me into submission .

“You can make this all go away if you stop denying me what I want. I don’t want to burn you, love. But I will. You need to learn your place, just as I had to learn mine.”

His mother had successfully ruined him—beaten him into obedience.

Like an abused animal, he’d learned to bite anyone who got too close.

He broke the things he loved, before they could break him.

Somewhere along the way, he must’ve decided that relationships were always conditional and that if he wasn’t on top, then he was on the bottom. I hated Sylvia with my entire heart.

“You know nothing of love, so stop calling me love, ” I said, baring my teeth.

He gave a dark laugh. “To be fair, I preferred seduction… over this . We had some fun, didn’t we? Bow to me or burn. Last chance, my obstinate little pony. Just say yes .”

I lunged at him in answer, before hitting the ground as chains yanked me back.

“Very well then,” he said stiffly. “This is a taste of what you can expect if you make a scene at the party.”

“Robert, Alaric. Get in here!” he yelled. I shrunk into the corner of the room, trying to make myself as small as possible.

“Restrain her,” Galen commanded. I begged them to leave me alone. The guards looked apologetic, with drawn brows and sunken shoulders. They pulled me from the floor, each taking an arm.

“Turn her around. Take off her dress.”

They hesitated and I felt the heat from his flames roar in response, making them startle and comply. They unfastened my buttons until the top of my body was exposed. I didn’t let the shame hit me. I’d already burrowed deep within myself and was too far away to reach, flying through a starry sky.