Page 32 of Hexual Healing
“Tansy,” he said very calmly as he used both hands to cover his crotch, “is there any way tonotdo whatever you're doing?”
Gary snickered, “I bet there are easier ways to get his pants off.You might want to save your magic for the battleoutsidethe bedroom.”He chortled as my cheeks started to burn.Thank the goddess I had enough melanin to hide my embarrassment.
“I'm not doing anything!I'm just standing here thinking about… Um.”I slammed my mouth shut, but it was too late.My brain was now stuck on last night's kiss, and now my magic was apparently trying to speed things along by removing pesky obstacles.Like clothes.
Gary made a sound like a disappointed teakettle.“Your sexual frustration is showing, darling.Literally.”
“Shut up!”
The butterflies chose that moment to form a helpful arrow pointing at Baz's abs.Because of course they did.
“Your magic's getting more specific,” Baz observed, still remarkably calm.He had the patience of a saint.“Yesterday, it was random chaos.Today it's…” He paused, searching for the right word.
“Horny?”Gary supplied helpfully.“I believe the word you're looking for is horny.”
I grabbed a throw pillow and hurled it at him.It transformed midair into a bouquet of bloodred roses that pelted him with petals.
“See?”Gary spluttered through the floral assault.“Even your violence is romantic!”
Baz's shirt finally solidified, though it was now inside-out and backward.He didn't bother fixing it.“Gary might have a point.”
“Please don't encourage him.”
“I mean about your magic being…directed.”He gestured at the butterflies, which had given up on the arrow and were now forming increasingly inappropriate shapes.
“My magic needs to mind its own damn business.”
The house creaked in what sounded like laughter.
“Okay,” I said, taking a deep breath.“Let's focus.We have less than twenty hours before Illanya comes back.We need to…” Baz's shirt vanished again.“For fuck's sake,” I said as I threw my hands up in frustration.
Directed, my ass!
“Maybe we should address this first,” he suggested, gesturing at his persistent nakedness problem.“Before you accidentally hex everyone in town into a state of undress.”
“That's not… I wouldn't!”I paused.“Actually, that's exactly what would happen, isn't it?”
“Based on current evidence?Yes.”
Gary slithered closer, leaving his usual trail of slime behind him.Somehow, Gary looked more smug than usual.
Why was Baz so cool with all the snail trail goo my familiar was leaving in his house?
I wonder if it’d show up under a black light.
“You know what would fix this?If you two just…”
I immediately stopped wondering about snail trails and black lights in time to stop him and blurt out a “Don't youdare!”
“Had a nice cup of tea and discussed your feelings like adults,” he finished innocently.
Baz snorted.“That's not what you were about to say.”
“Prove it.”
A knock at the door, or rather, the door frame, interrupted what was about to become a very awkward argument.We all turned to find a woman standing in the opening, surveying the destruction with the kind of calm that suggested she'd seen worse.
She was tall, with wild red curls and eyes that seemed to see too much.Power radiated from her like heat from a forge.