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5

SADIE

Pulling into the yard at the clubhouse, all the brothers are already here, even the guys from Mountain Heights have stuck around. Hawk is the last bike to pull in, parking between the sheriff’s SUV and a familiar citrus green 1970 Chevrolet Chevelle. Declan’s lawyer, also known as Jameson’s ex, Allyson is here which means Gabe called her in to town just in case.

Smart man, my uncle.

I pull in a little further down the building, passing the ambulance that’s blocking the front. The two paramedics walk past Hawk with their gurney. They exchange head nods as way of greeting, and I watch as he waits for me to exit my car.

“Shit.” I curse to myself. I have no idea how any of this is going to go, but the pit in my stomach tells me it’s going to be a shitshow.

When I reach Hawk’s bike, he reaches for my hand. I feel like all the color has drained from my face, a light sheen of sweat resting on my brow. I guess it’s to be expected. It’s not usual to be hauling a dead body out of the clubhouse. Not one that hadn’t been properly prepared for the pigs anyway.

The front door swings open and I pull my hand back from his as Jake walks out heading straight for us.

“About fucking time, man. Come on. Pres is waiting on you inside.” He says, acting calm and casual, like it’s any other day at the clubhouse.

“Yeah, okay. One sec.” Hawk’s phone chimes and he immediately pulls it out of his pocket. His brow creases as he navigates the screen. I can’t see what he’s looking at but make a mental note to check the clone later. Jake’s standing there looking between the two of us, his brow raised and smug smile.

“Well, good morning you two.” He says, wrapping me in a side hug, giving me a kiss on the temple. Hawk growls behind me. Jake’s like a brother to me and kissing my temple is something he’s done a thousand times, but Hawk is acting like an ass.

He claimed you.

He’s delusional. It was the heat of the moment. He didn’t mean it. Right?

“Hey.” My reply comes out shaky and unsure. Jake’s eyes narrow in on my features, then back to Hawk. His gaze flicks to mine momentarily then back to his phone looking pissed

What is that all about?

“We’ll be right in.” Hawk says, his voice tight, full of anger. My eyes snap to his, and I’m right. Jake nods taking his leave back inside the clubhouse.

“We need to talk.” Hawk says his voice tight. “My room. Now.”

He pockets his phone then taking my hand drags me through the clubhouse, past the guys all standing in the common area with the Sheriff and Allyson. Past Jake and Avery holding each other near the bar. Gabe sees us, giving us a puzzled once over, but Hawk doesn’t stop.

Once we get to his room, he pulls me inside and slams the door locking it behind him.

“What the fuck is this?” He points to his phone where a video is open, playing silently. It’s the security footage from last night when I let Thomas down into the basement.

I stand stuck in place, terrified. I knew he would find out, but I didn’t know Tate was going to show him now, before I could escape.

“Sit your ass on that bed and don’t you fucking move until I tell you.” Hawk starts the video over, this time with the sound on. I take a seat like he said silently trembling, tears welling up in my eyes as he watches how I betrayed him and the club.

The video cuts off just before I left the room, leaving Thomas and Nate alone, which makes no sense. Why would Tate cut off the video before showing them that I left making it look like I could’ve killed Nate when it was Thomas who killed him? He was alive when I left. I knew what Thomas was going to do, but I didn’t do it. I left. But Hawk can’t see that.

“Start fucking talking Sadie.” He growls. “How the fuck did you get down there, and what the hell were you doing? How the fuck did Thomas get in there with you?”

“Look,” I start, my hands instinctively going up in front of me pleading with him to hear me out. He’s visibly shaking with rage. Hawk would never hurt me, but I still feel the need to be on guard for anything. “I can explain. Just, calm down. Let’s have a seat a-and I can tell you what you need to know.”

“How about you cut the shit and just tell me everything?” He steps forward, moving closer and I scoot back. He looks at me like I’ve lost my damn mind. He could easily catch me and tie my ass up if he wanted to. I’ve heard the rumors about the kind of shit he gets up to in here, the tools he uses with the club girls.

Jealousy courses through me at the thought, but the desire to save my own ass and escape is a more pressing matter that needs all of my focus and attention.

“I-I let Thomas into the basement. He wanted to talk to Nate. He wanted me to hear the truth about what happened the night Maggie died. He was trying to…”

“He was using you. What the hell did you think? He was going to talk to Nate and tell you how none of this was ever any of Thomas’s fault and you’d suddenly have a father again?” He snaps. “Are you that fucking delusional?”

“Like you, I don’t have a father, nor do I want one. I was helping him find out the truth about what happened because Thomas was tricked into believing something different was going to happen. They used him to get to Jonah and Maggie. He was a fucking pawn in their game, and he wanted me to know…”

“He wanted you to believe his bullshit and feel sorry for him, Sadie! He was playing you to get to Nate. Thomas went down there with the intention of killing Nate to silence him. And keep him from telling us what we need to know. Thomas was covering his own ass.” Hawk shouts in my face, his arms flung out to his sides as he shakes his head. He takes a step back dragging his hand through his hair, his eyes burning with so much hate, my heart aches. “You fucking believed him and went behind the club’s back and fucking helped him. Same old Sadie. Thinking only of yourself. Do you ever give a shit about the consequences of your actions and what it could mean for us? For this club? Your family? How fucking selfish can you possibly be?”

There’s a sound in my head, like glass shattering against a wall, but I know it’s not real.

You knew this was coming. He would hate you eventually.

But I didn’t know it would hurt like this.

My temper flares. The truth on the tip of my tongue, wanting to escape, to prove to Hawk that all I’ve ever cared about was this club and the people in it. To tell him how I did what I did to save them! But I can’t. It wouldn’t matter if I did. He won’t believe me anyway.

Tears are streaming freely down my cheeks, but I’m too pissed to fucking care. “I’m not na?ve, you big jackass. Your father isn’t the only one who fucked people over in this club. Thomas was looking to redeem himself. To get Nate…”

“Redeem himself? Do you hear yourself? There’s no redemption for what they’ve done! Have you lost your fucking mind? You think that what? If Nate says Thomas was the fall guy for Jonah’s death and that he was somehow not clued into the plan when they killed Maggie that somehow it would absolve Thomas of the part he played in everything? Seriously?” Hawk steps closer, invading my space. My heart is thumping so hard in my chest, I wonder if he can hear it. There’s a lump in my throat. My anger at war with my heartache. I want to punch him-to beat his ass and remind him that I’m not the selfish little shit he thinks I am. He taught me how to help people. How to be loyal and love with all I fucking have in me. To put this family first.

But none of that matters now.

I stand to my feet, but he’s quick to block my exit.

He scrubs his face one more time, looking at me as if he doesn’t know me. His expression hard, his eyes cold and unseeing. Maybe he doesn’t.

“It’s shit like this that makes it impossible for you to be mine. My ol’ lady has to be loyal to me and to this club. She has to do what she’s told and follow the fucking rules, not put herself and everyone else in danger at every fucking opportunity.” He shakes his head, looking past me. “I don’t know what the hell I was thinking claiming you last night.” He takes a step back, waving his arm between us. “This would never work. I can never trust you to be honest or do what’s best for us or the club.”

A sob escapes me, but if he notices he doesn’t say.

“You need to get the fuck out of here.” His eyes meet mine. “I’m going to have to tell Pres what you’ve done but it’ll have to wait until we have church. But until then, I want you to get in your car and go the fuck home. Do you hear me?” He leans in, his breath mingling with mine, but this doesn’t have the same effect as it did just moments ago when he took my mouth with his. Something he now regrets. “You better do as I say and go the fuck home. No where else. You hear me? I’d have you stay here, but I can’t trust myself to be anywhere near you right now. I’m too angry and you’re too - you.” His tone is one of complete disgust and the last piece of my heart tumbles to the ground.

Hawk opens the door, motioning for me to leave. I walk out into the hall, and whisper, “I’m sorry,” as I pass him on the way. I hear him scoff, and I know those two words mean absolutely nothing to him, but I mean them with every ounce of my being.

His door slams shut behind me, but I don’t look back. I head for the backdoor, the same one I snuck Thomas through and head straight for Loretta, getting in and starting her up. I slam my hands on the steering wheel fighting back the need to scream.

I throw Loretta in reverse, backing out of my spot, then shift her into gear and hit the fucking gas, watching as gravel kicks up behind me. The gate is still open, and I haul ass out of the compound and head for the open road.

I’m only half a block away when my phone rings, Vincenzo’s name appears on Loretta’s screen. I touch the green button and answer, “Yeah.”

“Do you have called ID, Miss Jenkins?” His tone is calm, even, but I know he’s not happy with my lack of manners. One thing Vincenzo Parisi is a stickler for is respect. Ask me if I give a shit.

“I’m in a hurry and wasn’t expecting it to be you calling.” I tell him, frantically wiping the tears from my face as I drive like a maniac down the winding road.

“I see. Well, perhaps check who’s calling next time. That should help you know which greeting is appropriate, yes?” He pauses waiting for a response. Prick.

“My apologies.” I say, my voice tight. I’m in no fucking mood for another arrogant asshole to tell me how I do everything wrong.

“Very good. I assume Tate told you about the situation your family is in.” He says. I hear the sound of rustling in the background.

“No. He called but I wasn’t in a position to take the call. I’m just leaving the clubhouse. The paramedics were there with the sheriff to pick up Nate’s body.” I tell him. “What kind of trouble are they in?”

“Good. Go home. Grab your things, Matteo has sent a vehicle around to pick you up. It will be arriving in less than five minutes. Be ready.” He completely ignores my question and hangs up the call and I finally let myself scream.