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CHAPTER

THIRTY-FOUR

ASHER

“What happened with Destiny will not happen tonight,” Bajwa was saying. “You are going to experience a wonderful, joyful journey. You are going to do the work on yourselves that you came here to do. You are going to experience healing.”

He sounded so confident that Asher had no trouble believing that he really did believe all of this to be true. In the mind of Dr. Bajwa, DX8 was a miracle, and nothing was going to shake that faith.

Asher’s experience of this retreat had created an opposite unshakeable conviction.

Knowing what happened to Amira and to Destiny was enough to drive away any lingering curiosity of what it would be like to experience the high for himself.

DX8 and all other psychedelic drugs were undeniably dangerous, and the public’s recent embrace of them should have already been ringing warning bells in the minds of regulators, politicians, and the media.

And he was confident that those red flags would be noticed, especially if Karlin actually went to the authorities tomorrow as they had agreed.

This was about more than just Senera.

It was about bringing light into a place where darkness reigned.

He stole a glance in her direction.

Tonight, she was dressed more formally than she had for the rest of the retreat. She’d even brought a lab coat to the hut, though it was discarded on top of Bajwa’s CD player at the moment.

Ever since the others had arrived back at the retreat site and she’d rejoined the group, her smiles had been cold, and any conversation she made had sounded forced.

Asher knew her well enough now to see the gears turning.

She was in deep focus mode now, single-mindedly set on only one objective until this nightmare ended.

He shared her determination, but his acting would have to be a lot more convincing.

“Mr. Bishop, are you feeling fully prepared?” Bajwa asked him, as if on cue.

He was prepared, all right. Right down to the concealed handgun he wore. Tonight, he wasn’t taking any chances.

“You bet, Doc,” he said, giving a thumbs-up and a carefree smile. “We got this. Let’s do it for Destiny!”

With this, he let out a cheer, and everyone joined in. Even Paul offered a weak whoop, though his face was etched with confusion, as though he was expecting a hidden camera to pop out at any moment and tell him that all of this was a joke.

Which, Asher supposed, it kind of was. But it was a joke he’d have to be in on for the next several hours. May as well do it justice.

“Your dose is perfect this time,” Karlin said, lifting up a glass cup and gesturing in Asher’s direction. “You’re going to actually feel what it’s like to experience DX8, I promise.”

Bajwa clapped his hands together, his dark brown eyes gleaming. “Excellent. We wouldn’t want you missing out on this once in a lifetime chance to grow and to explore our universe.”

He looked so excited that Asher could actually pity him. He could only wonder how the man would react when he learned that one of his best scientists was risking everything in order to put an end to his research entirely.

“I think we’re ready to get started,” Karlin said, getting up from her spot near the plastic cooler of DX8 and beginning to hand out doses to the others.

When she reached Asher’s mat and passed him his own, her fingers lingered on his a few seconds longer than necessary.

But before he could offer her so much as a surreptitious wink, she’d already moved on to Cora.

A new fear struck at him as he waited for the others to receive their doses.

He’d been so worried about whether Karlin would have the courage to go through with leaving the retreat tomorrow that he hadn’t considered what would happen if she did.

Would they continue to grow closer together without the forced bonds of the retreat, or would Karlin push him away as soon as she no longer needed him?

He wanted to believe that they had a real connection, that her feelings for him were just as real as his feelings for her, but he knew that nothing was guaranteed. Worse, he also knew that even when things were going well, he had an epic knack for messing everything up.

He gripped the glass cup more tightly.

He couldn’t let himself worry about how Karlin felt about him. The life and death reality of dealing with Senera had to be his only priority, at least for now.

Glancing around the room, he let his eyes linger for a moment on each of his fellow retreat patients.

He’d failed the people who’d relied on him back in Afghanistan, and those men had been soldiers. Lily, Paul, and Cora were not. Neither was Destiny.

Neither was Amira.

He couldn’t turn back time and help her now, but he could certainly make sure that justice was truly served on her behalf, even as she awaited it in death.

Finally, his eyes alighted on Karlin, who was moving her lab coat and saying something he couldn’t hear to Bajwa.

She looked so fierce and determined, like some invincible goddess, but he knew that wasn’t true.

Deep down, she was vulnerable in ways that few other people could fathom.

Whatever choice she made about continuing to want him when this was over didn’t matter.

She’d still trusted him, still shared things with him that she had carried by herself for years.

He would be strong for her. He would protect her.

Even if it was the last thing he ever did.

KARLIN

The sound of drumbeats filled Karlin’s ears as her patients downed their doses of DX8.

She realized she was holding her breath, but so far, nothing seemed to be amiss.

Everyone was sitting quietly, listening to Bajwa as he gave a few final instructions, including letting everyone know that he and Karlin would be monitoring their vital signs and taking notes.

She was glad that they’d managed to give Axel the proper placebo this time. His acting was convincing, but he couldn’t exactly fake a higher blood pressure or an increased heart rate. She didn’t think that claiming an underdose would work a second time.

They wouldn’t start drawing blood or measuring vitals for another hour or so, so she sat down and tried to relax. Even Bajwa seemed to have lost some of his usual energy, choosing to lean against the wall instead of wandering around the room.

Despite her boss’s assurances to their patients, she knew that the incident with Destiny had to have rattled him. Not that it would come close to being enough evidence for him that DX8 was dangerous.

After fifteen minutes or so had passed, she got to her feet and did a quick circuit to check on each guest. Everyone had their eyes closed, and both Paul and Cora were rocking back and forth slightly.

When she approached Axel, she noticed that he was doing the same.

He didn’t even open his eyes to try and sneak a smile in her direction.

It was as though he hadn’t noticed she was there at all.

Well, whatever. So long as it convinced Bajwa and everyone else that he was high as a kite, she wasn’t going to–

A surprising sound from outside broke through the pounding of the drums.

A dog was barking loudly, and a few seconds later, the sound of sirens joined the chorus. Bajwa hit pause on the CD player and looked over at her with confusion.

“What on earth is going on?”

Karlin opened her mouth, and then shut it again as the sound of voices and footsteps grew louder.

A second barking dog joined the other one. She could distinguish it by the low rumbling of its bark, and for one absurd moment, she found herself thinking of John and the service dog he desperately needed.

“Karlin, what is going on?” Bajwa demanded, pacing back and forth in place. She stood completely still, her heart rattling against her ribcage as she tried desperately to think of a possible answer to his question.

At that moment, four police officers, a black Labrador, and an enormous German Shepherd burst through the door and entered the hut.

“I have no idea,” she said honestly, trying desperately to catch Axel’s eye as the chaos rose to an immediate fever pitch.

“Everyone stay where you are, and stay calm!” one officer–a compact man with dark skin who seemed to be in charge–commanded.

“We’re looking for Dr. Daman Bajwa,” the man continued, his fellow officers fanning out behind him, weapons drawn. One, a tan-skinned man who looked to be easily six and a half feet tall, kept guard at the door.

Karlin looked at her patients, all of whom were now making noise, rocking quickly back and forth, or covering their ears. Axel was doing the same, and while she knew he had to stay undercover, she desperately wanted him to acknowledge the insanity of the situation.

Had he called this in even though they’d agreed to wait until tomorrow?

She couldn’t think of any other explanation as to why the retreat had suddenly become overrun with armed law enforcement. She tried to catch his eye, hoping for a reassuring glance, but he was ignoring her completely. Undercover or not, he was seriously ticking her off.

“I’m Dr. Bajwa, but this is–this is preposterous!

” Bajwa said, stepping forward with his hands raised.

His face had gone red, and his eyes looked like they were going to bulge out of his skull.

“For what possible reason am I in trouble with the law? I’m an American citizen!

I have all of my documentation, and I can explain any discrepancies! ”

Karlin resisted the urge to let out a snort.

There were discrepancies, all right, if Benjamin Forge’s research was to be believed. But she highly doubted that was why Amarillo PD had shown up now.

The officer in charge nodded to the other two standing nearby. Within seconds, they had produced handcuffs and closed in on Bajwa. “You are under arrest in connection with the suspicious death of Amira Elizabeth Gorsky. You have the right to remain silent–”

Bajwa interrupted the man immediately. “This is an outrage! I hope you are prepared to be sued for all you’ve got! I did not even work at Senera Pharmaceuticals at the time of Amira Gorsky’s death!”

To Karlin’s horror, he managed to yank one hand free of the police officer trying to cuff him, and pointed it in her direction.

“I wasn’t there, but she was. I’ve seen the file! She was the one who signed off on a severely depressed woman’s participation in a Phase I medical trial. Arrest her !”

Karlin’s heart felt like it was going to burst right up into her throat, but she said nothing, figuring that holding her ground was the best option.

She had taken the aforementioned file with her and hidden it in her cabin.

There was no way that Bajwa knew it was gone, and it was far from guaranteed that there were other copies of it floating around, especially if her theory was correct and it contained additional false information designed to bring her down.

Senera–and therefore Bajwa–wouldn’t have wanted anyone to see it unless they found themselves in a truly tight situation.

“You can explain everything down at the station,” one of the other officers grunted, finally managing to secure the silver cuffs around Bajwa’s wrists. “I’ll make sure you get a chance to contact a lawyer.”

She knew the truth about what she’d done was going to come out, but if there was any way she could choose, it was going to be on her terms.

Once again, she found herself looking to Axel for comfort, only to find him sitting with his back pressed to Cora’s, his eyes pressed shut. Cora was shouting something incomprehensible at the hut’s wall. A few feet away, Lily was rubbing a weeping Paul’s back. What a disaster.

Bajwa, too, noticed the deteriorating situation, and decided to change tack.

“I can’t leave now,” he begged. “This is an active medical trial. I have four participants currently under the influence of a powerful psychedelic. They could hurt themselves. Please.”

The dark-skinned officer nodded to the huge man by the door, who called the two K9s away from the cooler of empty DX8 vials that they were currently investigating.

“We already spoke to another scientist at Senera,” the officer in charge explained, turning back to a defeated-looking Bajwa.

“Unless you have immediate proof of your serious accusations about Miss McKenna, I have been assured that she is perfectly capable of monitoring the group on her own for the rest of the night. Am I correct?”

Karlin couldn’t decide if she had gotten extremely lucky or extremely unlucky.

Senera’s offices would be even more empty by now. If the cops had only spoken to the young scientist she and Axel had run into, he would have had no idea that Bajwa wasn’t even part of the company at the time of Amira’s death.

“Yes, sir,” Karlin said quickly, deciding to roll with the situation for now. “Once you guys clear out, I should be able to calm everyone down.”

The officer nodded, and with the help of the other men, began shoving Bajwa in the direction of the door.

“I’m cooperating! I’m cooperating! Get your hands off of me, you beasts! Don’t you know who I am?” Bajwa shouted, nearly stumbling as they finally maneuvered him out of the door and into the night.

For several long seconds, Karlin stood where she was, staring after them as Bajwa continued to ramble.

Though she knew that she’d had no other choice but to let them go, every instinct was screaming at her to follow them and to tell the truth.

The whole truth, and nothing but the truth.

She rubbed at her temples. Now that she thought about it, that one was definitely for the courtroom, not talking to the cops.

Not that it mattered now.

The truth was a luxury she couldn’t afford.