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Chapter Twelve

Roan

A ll I knew was what Jory had told me, that Baer had called on Fenli and embarrassed her in front of the men who’d been in the hall. She’d retreated when he’d dismissed her, fallen, and Jory had helped her up. Then she’d struck shoulders with me on her way out.

And I was furious with my father.

I headed straight for him.

“Whoa, let’s think this through—” Jory was saying behind me, but I ignored him.

“Baer,” I said, drawing his attention from the man beside him.

He looked me up and down. “It’s about time you show up. We’ve been going over the plan for the salmon run and—”

“Why would you do that to her?” I said, cutting him off. I never cut Baer off. I never came to him with so much anger pounding through me, and I never questioned him.

His brows pulled together, and he almost smiled.

“Do what?”

“You brought her in here and embarrassed her in front of everyone.”

He sat in his chair. “Nonsense. If she’s embarrassed, she embarrassed herself. All I did was talk to her about a job. She can’t keep caring for the birds. ”

I gritted my teeth. The surrounding hall had grown quiet. Men were listening, and whatever I said would be spread far and wide through the clan.

“You should have spoken with her in private.”

He shrugged, barely listening to me now.

“She’ll be fine. Honestly, Roan, you should be thanking me. This is your responsibility, but I know why you hesitate. I’m helping the two of you get your feet under you.”

I glared at him. “You’ve helped enough.”

For just a moment, surprise flashed in his eyes. It didn’t last long. My old man was nothing if not relentlessly in control.

I turned to leave, the men parting as I made my way to the door, but I heard the words when he spoke them.

“Careful, Roan. You’re starting to sound like a man.”

I slammed the door on my way out. It was foolish and only showed what a child I still was.

I knew it, but if I’d had one hundred doors, I would have slammed every last one of them.

I wanted to break something. And then I wanted to break the nose of every bastard in that hall who thought embarrassing Fenli was a fine thing to do.

I hauled ass to our hut, hoping she had gone home. When it came into view, I saw her leaning against the door frame, Indi on the threshold.

“Roan,” the woman said as I drew nearer.

She came over and pulled me into a hug. I tried to make eye contact with Fenli from over her shoulder, but she wasn’t looking at me.

Her eyes were closed, and her jaw was stiff, her hands tucked tightly to her sides with her arms crossed over her chest. “I’ve caught you both, lucky me. ”

Indi let me go and smiled. Fenli broke from the moment she was having and tried to look nonchalant, but she wasn’t fooling me .

“I just came by to see my girl,” Indi said, turning back to Fenli, though she kept her arms wound in mine. “Isn’t she beautiful?”

I blanched. When I glanced at Fenli, I found her looking equally horrified. She met my gaze, and we both stood there like idiots for too many moments too long. The sight made Indi laugh.

“Oh, you two are perfect for each other,” she said.

At this, Fenli broke her stare-down with me and glared at her mother instead.

Indi didn’t notice, or, if she did, didn’t care.

She went on. “Married and still so precious about the smallest of things. Of course she’s beautiful.

It was an easy question.” She bumped me with her shoulder. “Right?”

I looked between the two of them, then nodded dumbly. She was beautiful. Of course she was. Indi was right, it was an easy question. The hard part was answering it in front of my wife, who would most certainly want to kill me over such a confession.

Fenli looked at her feet.

“Is that all, Ma?”

“No, are you coming to the Wool Moon celebration tomorrow night?”

Fenli shook her head.

“Well, you have to. Everyone goes.”

“No one will miss me.”

“What is it?” I asked, drawing Fenli’s eyes. There was discomfort there, and I wasn’t sure what I’d done to earn it.

“Nothing,” she said. “Just—it’s dumb—the women—we spin the wool and, and…”

She was staring at her feet again, her forehead lined with tension, and I waited for her to regain her words. When it looked like she’d composed herself and she opened her mouth to speak, Indi cut her off .

“We spin wool late into the night, tell stories, eat sweets, and drink far too much mead. It’s to celebrate the wool that’s been sheered, cleaned, and carded, and it’s always a wonderful night. But it’s just us women, Roan. Can’t let you boys have all the fun.”

I looked back at Fenli and tried to catch her eye, but she had turned away again.

“Anyway, think about it?” Indi said. “I’d love to have you there. We could sit together with Esska and be the troublemakers, just like old times.”

At this, Fenli gave a small smile.

“There’s my girl,” Indi said. “I love you, baby. See you tomorrow.”

“See you, Ma.”

Fenli let herself in, and I followed behind her.

“Baer is an asshole,” I started once the door was closed, but she cut me off with a raised hand.

“Don’t,” she said. “Just stop.”

“You should tell him you want to make maps.”

Her jaw dropped open and hung for several moments before she snapped it shut. I’d done it now. I could see it in her eyes. She thought I was an idiot, a fool, but it was more than that. Just the suggestion of coming out with her maps made her nervous. She was afraid of what I might do.

“You would see me fed to the wolves.”

“For mapping?” I was an idiot. Even I could hear the stupidity in my words, but I wanted them to be true, so out they came.

She shook her head slowly, as if in disbelief. “I’d get shipped off to—to Runehall’s clan for less. You think I’m w-wanted here? ”

She refused to talk to me for the rest of the evening. I spent the night lying on the floor in the loft, thinking about her words. They reminded me of what Baer had said when she’d run away.

There are those who think she shouldn’t be here, that we should send her back, and if they knew about this—

I wondered how Fenli knew that there were members of the clan who thought she belonged with Runehall’s people.

And I knew I would not like the answer.