Page 5 of Embrace the Darkness

“Maura?” he said again, more firmly this time, making me realize I hadn’t responded to him.

I took a second to choose my words carefully. With a mob boss as a father you learn never to say anything incriminating over the phone. You didn't know who might be listening.

“I’m coming home. I…”Reel it in, Maura. You can’t show him weakness.“But I need help. Jamie might be the right person to send,” I said, sounding monotone.

Silence stretched between us. Asking for help wasn’t something I did. I’d always been independent and self-sufficient. Telling him I was coming home was probably the last thing he'd expected me to say as well, seeing how I'd given everyone the one finger salute as I'd walked out the door six years ago. I was stubborn. It was my gift as well as my curse and he knew this better than anyone. So I was sure it wouldn’t take him long to figure out I was up shit creek without a paddle if I was willing to swallow my pride and come crawling back home.

“He’s on his way.”

I nodded, then realized he couldn’t see me. “Okay.” I leaned back into the couch, suddenly feeling very tired. I’d been so tense, sitting stiffly. Now my muscles were starting to ache. My arms more so. It was the adrenaline. It was wearing off and the urge to cry was strong. I nevercried. At least, not for a long time I hadn’t, and definitely not in front of others.

“Stefan, I—” My voice cracked, making me cringe.Shit!

“Don’t chase the rabbit.” He’d been saying that phrase my whole life. It meant, don’t succumb to the temptation of being consumed by your emotions. “Are you hurt?” he asked like Jamie had.

At his concern, my heart warmed. Then, just as quickly, it turned to stone. This was what he did. He rarely showed he cared. When he did, it was just enough to keep me hooked or complacent to go through another long span of heartache and bullshit he’d inevitably put me through. “Nothing a whole bottle of whiskey can’t cure.” I tried to joke.

“I’ll have one waiting here for you.”

I didn’t respond to that because I didn’t know what to say. I hadn’t spoken to him in over a year and for the past six I’d been trying to erase everything about him out of my life.

“I’ll see you tonight,” he stated before he hung up.

Three and a half hours passed before there was a knock on my front door.

Finally!

I only lived an hour away from New Haven. After waiting two hours, I'd started to pace anxiously. After two and a half hours, I'd raided Tom’s liquor stash. For the remainder of the time waiting, I'd practically chugged four glasses of cheap bourbon without even tasting it.

I peeked cautiously through the peephole with my empty pistol in hand. If needed, I could at least threaten someone with it. Not that I was expecting a threat. I just hadn’t put it down since I’d come downstairs.

Through the tiny hole, I saw Jamie standing on my doorstep. He wasn’t alone. All I had to see was a head of golden hair to know it was Louie. I shouldn’t have been surprised. Where one was, the other wasn’t far. They’d been like that since high school.

Feeling nervous, I stepped back from the door. It’d been six years since I’d seen either of them. They'd been my best friends, once upon a time. A lot had changed since then—I wasn’t the same person anymore. Being in the mob had undoubtedly had some effects on them, too. Before I'd left, they had already been working for my father for years, quickly moving up the ranks. I hadn't been blind to the toll it had on them, no matter how hard they tried to hide it.

Would I be opening the door to strangers?

Only one way to find out.

I opened the door slowly. My eyes instantly met Jamie’s beautiful hazel depths, mostly green with dark brown flecks, before shifting to meet Louie’s ocean blues.

I went to move my gun behind my back. The small movement caught their attention and their eyes dropped to my side. The tiniest flicker of surprise told me I hadn't been quick or discreet enough.

The three of us stood there, not saying a word as we took each other in.Time was good to them,I mused as I did a slow perusal of each of them from head to toe. They’d always had pretty boy looks with the bad boy appeal, which they'd used to their advantage from high school on. Girl after girl would throw themselves at them back then. Now they were men, with about twenty pounds of added muscle.

Feeling their eyes roam over me as well left me feeling a little self-conscious. I was a mess, still wearing the clothes I'd killed people in. I hadn't checked my jeans or fitted green T-shirt for blood splatter. Both garments were dark in color, so I wasn’t too worried. As for my long red hair, I’d been either tugging on it or running my fingers through it for hours.Oh well. It was best not to dwell on something I couldn’t change. Besides, both of them had seen me worse than this before.

My fingers began to itch to snap my bands as my mind drifted back to that night. They'd both seen the aftermath. Instead of pulling at my bands, I had to settle for squeezing my hand tightly around the grip of my gun.

“I see the bromance is still going strong,” I teased, leaning against the door frame, trying to appear nonchalant, even though the thought of having two bodies upstairs poked at the back of my brain like a pickaxe.

Louie cracked a smile while Jamie just stood there as his normal unreadable, stoic self. He’d always been a brooding ass. Louie, however, rarely took anything seriously.

“We like to role play. It keeps the relationship interesting,” Louie played along, making my mouth quirk a little.

“That just put a dirty visual in my head of you playing a naughty nurse who has toblowlife back into Jamie. Talk about a whole new meaning to resuscitation.” Could I be crude and crass with a potty mouth that would make a sailor blush? Yes, I grew up surrounded by men who were criminals.

I'd had to constantly watch what I said around Tom. The few times I'd slipped up, he’d looked at me with such disgust. With Jamie and Louie, though, I could spew as many vulgar things as I wanted with zero judgment.