Page 35 of Embrace the Darkness

I awoke to warm air tickling my neck and a heavy body practically squishing me. For a second I thought it was Tom. Then my brain roared to life, blowing away the drowsy fog. Tom was dead. I was back home. Jamie had fallen asleep on my bed when we'd lain down to watch a movie last night. I didn’t have the heart to wake him.

While we both slept, he must have gravitated to my side of the bed. His face was buried in the crook of my neck. His torso pinned my entire right side and one of his legs stretched across both of mine. I wasn’t sure if this constituted cuddling or if I'd been rendered the human equivalent of a body pillow. Whatever sleeping Jamie had intended, his hand had made its way up my shirt and was currently groping my boob.

Oh boy.

Murmuring in his sleep, his whole body shifted, and his fingers flexed around my breast. My breathing stalled.Well, one part of him is up.I gaped at the hard rod now pushing into my hip through his slacks. He was still wearing his clothes from yesterday. Having kept his promise, he'd never left my side even to go change.

His hand slid to cup the side of my breast, thumb brushing over my nipple. I swallowed a gasp. When his thumb stroked over my puckered flesh once more, my heart rate took off at a galloping rate while I did my best to hold utterly still.

Mumbling incoherently again, he trailed his frisky hand down my stomach, making my skin break out in goosebumps. His pinky finger reached the band of my underwear first. Dipping underneath it, the rest of his fingers followed, sliding over my mound. My eyes nearly bugged out of their sockets.

I need to wake him.

That thought disappeared the moment his fingers grazed my clit. This time I couldn’t contain my gasp. My eyes rolled into the back of my head as he began rubbing in small vigorous circles over my tiny bud of nerves.If he keeps that up…oh my.It was killing me not to move. His touch, even asleep, was determined and skilled.With the right amount of pressure and the right motion, my breathing increased. A sleeping man was about to get me off.Fuck, am I taking advantage of him?

With my one free hand, which had been fisted in the bed sheet, I grabbed his bicep, holding on for dear life as he pushed me toward the edge. “Jamie,” I panted in a futile last second attempt to wake him. I got no response, and he kept working me.

Oh fuck. Oh fuck!“Jaaamieeee!”I cried out as my body exploded. His hand froze and his body tensed while my own shuddered from the euphoric waves of my orgasm.

He lifted his head from my shoulder, eyes meeting my hooded ones. I felt flushed, breaths labored. With his hand still touching my clit, it was obvious what just happened. A slow minute passed with us just staring at each other before his eyes widened. He lifted himself off of me, hand retreating from my underwear as he sat back. I sat up too, scooting myself back against the headboard. My cheeks scorched with shame.

“I…ah…” I stammered, not that he seemed to notice. He appeared deep in thought as he stared down at his hand—the one that had just been in my underwear. My stomach twisted into a tight knot the longer the silence awkwardly stretched. “Please say something?”

His eyes lifted, traveling slowly up my legs, pausing at the apex of my thighs. He frowned with what seemed like disgust. “Did I…?”

“It’s not a big deal.” I instantly regretted my words.

“The fuck it isn’t,” he snapped harshly.

I winced, dropping my eyes.You really fucked up this time, Maura.

“I’m…” My throat felt like it was clogged.What am I supposed to say? I’m sorry?“I… I have to pee.” Sliding off the bed, I bolted for the bathroom. I was running away like always.Fucking coward.

I hid, pacing the small room longer than I intended, which was just supposed to be until I got my bearings and conjured a genuine, heartfelt apology. My cowardice held me back. Jamie hadn't realized what he'd been doing. He had probably been having a hot dream about a past conquest or a future one. I'd been one hundred percent coherent while I'd just lain there letting him touch me, knowing it was wrong.

When I eventually returned to my bedroom, Jamie was gone. He probably had to get ready for the day; the sun was starting to rise. Or he was too disgusted with me to stick around. Either way, his absence left me feeling guilt-ridden.

I picked up my cell from the nightstand to look at the time. It was five in the morning and I was wide awake. I debated whether or not I should seek Jamie out. I decided not to. If he'd wanted to talk, he would have stuck around.Right?I’d wait until tonight to approach him after he got done doing mob stuff.

That reminded me that I still needed to speak with Stefan about yesterday’s incident. I’d prefer to not go over it at the breakfast table. In fact, I planned on avoiding the dining room altogether. I wouldn’t be able to mask my internal freak out with Jamie sitting across from me, which in turn would cue in Stefan that something had happened. I would rather swallow hot coals than tell my father I had taken advantage of Jamie. So that left me with no choice but to catch him before he went downstairs.

With a plan in mind, I threw on some yoga pants and made my way to the staircase that led up to Stefan’s rooms, as in plural. His suite took up the entire third floor. It consisted of his gigantic bedroom that was double the size of mine, a walk-in closet that was the size of my room, his spa-like bathroom, and a private gym which had used to be my nursery when I'd been a baby.

Once I reached the top of the stairs, one of the solid oak double doors opened down the short hallway that led to Stefan’s suite. At first, I expected it to be Stefan already heading downstairs. To my jaw-dropping surprise, Brody stepped out with wet hair as if freshly showered and dressed in his usual suit. He didn’t notice me at first as he quietly closed the door behind him. I took that as my opportunity to recover from my shock.

He took two steps in my direction before he finally saw me. His eyes widened, steps faltering. Brody had always been terrible at hiding what he felt, which was perfect for me, especially right now. All it took was the quick flash of panic in his eyes to confirm what I’d been suspecting for years.Brody’s doing the walk of shame.Hmm, I didn’t like that phrase. There was nothing shameful about two consenting adults bumping uglies. The only shame here was the reason for hiding it.

My lips curled into ayou-are-so-bustedsmile.

He cleared his throat and straightened his shoulders. “Well?”

I had loads of questions. However, they were for Stefan, not his lover. When Stefan was ready to tell me himself about this, I’d ask everything I was dying to know. For now, I’d settle for just one question. “How long?”

He hesitated, contemplating how he should answer. “On and off for twenty years.” His honesty was as shocking as it was saddening. They’d been together for so long and I was just finding out about it now? I wouldn’t have known at all if I hadn’t caught Brody.

I had to be real with myself. Why would Stefan have told me? We weren’t close. Nodding, I passed Brody as I continued to Stefan’s room.

“You’re not surprised?” he asked.