Page 54 of CowSex

“Fucking hell, Koa, somebody should write a book or make a film about your life. I thought TOWIE was where all the drama happened. Someone should make aThe Only Way is Aspenshow. Do they have aHousewives of Aspen?”

I get an entirely blank stare.

“You’ve no clue what I’m banging on about, do ya, Cowboy?”

“I ain’t got a Scooby, Essex.”

A little of the light returns to his eyes, and we both smile for a moment.

“I’m so sorry all of that has happened to you. I can’t believe women like your exes actually exist.”

“Me, either. Fucked over twice by two different women. No way in hell will that ever be happening again.”

I feel his words. I physically feel them hit me. They land right in the middle of my chest, and they squeeze it tight, so tight that it hurts.

I don’t know why his words are painful.

I’m confused as to why they leave me hugely disappointed.

He’s a stranger. But isn’t everyone when we first meet them?

I look at him in silence for a few moments, wondering what it is exactly I’m expecting from him, from our relationship, if that’s what our association can be called.

Despite my brain’s tendency to go off on a tangent and to tell itself unbelievably fantastical stories, I haven’t actually allowed that to happen with him. Yeah, he is hot, as fit as fuck, and I’d most definitely consider the possibility of shagging him before I leave. I mean, why not? We’re both adults, and there’s definitely chemistry between us. That’s been apparent since the get-go. But none of that explains the hollowness in my belly or the tightness in my chest.

“The drugstore’s this way, let’s go get something for that wrist of yours and then we’ll find a phone store.”

I nod and follow him.

KOA

IDON’T KNOW WHAT THEfuck it is with this woman, but she has me spilling my guts every goddamn time I open my mouth.

I don’t have too many close friends. Clay, Dev, and Blake from the band and a couple of my foremen from work. Dean and Lee especially. Dean is married to my PA and secretary, Shannon and I went to high school with all three of them.

As we walk, I think about how it might be to introduce Gracie to my friends. Her and Shannon would probably get along good. Too good maybe.

Aside from the guys in the band and from work, I talk to my mom and Bill about certain things, but only certain things. And then there’s Lexi, she’s someone who I don’t even want to think about while I’m with Gracie.

But none of them, not the guys from the band, work, or my mom have ever had me opening up the way Gracie does, and I don’t know why that is. Perhaps talking to a stranger is easier than baring my soul to someone that I have a history with. And yet, despite only knowing her for three days, I don’t feel like Gracie’s a stranger.

We hit the drugstore, purchase a compression bandage, some ibuprofen, and seven flavours of some lip stuff that Gracie insists she can’t live without. We then cross the street to the phone store to get her whatever she needs from there.

She’s been quiet since we left the diner, no doubt absorbing everything I revealed to her earlier. It doesn’t sound good when you say it aloud, I get that. Two failed marriages and two kids with different women, but what pisses me off more is that in neither case was it my fault. The only blame I’ll accept is in my poor choice of women to try to settle down with. That’s why I’ll never do it again. Lexi knows this, I think she’d like more but accepts that it’s never gonna happen.

“Thank you.”

Gracie’s voice brings me back from my thoughts. We’re leaving the phone store after she picked up a new SIM and a US charger for her phone so that she doesn’t have to keep using an adapter, and someone has held the door open for us.

“You’re very welcome—” The guy’s voice cuts short, and I glance up. “Carmichael, heard you were back in town. Didn’t believe it, though.”

Logan Barnes is standing in front of us, but he lets go of the door, allowing it to close. Obviously expecting a conversation. But I can’t stand the fucker. He’s the last person on this earth I’d want to stand and pass the time of day with in the sunniest of conditions, but definitely not while there’s snow falling around us and the wind is starting to whip up.

Before I can shut him down, he’s holding his hand out to Gracie.

“Logan Barnes, don’t believe I’ve had the pleasure.”

I put my hand on the small of her back—yeah, again—and am about to steer her away, when she responds by taking his hand.