Page 251 of Conquered

“Don’t you dare apologise, Lilly Darling,” Jax scolds, using my own words against me. “You’ve had so much happen, in such a short time. And you’re the glue that sticks us together, the air that we all breathe. The others needed you more.”

“But you needed me, too, and I didn’t notice.” It’s my turn to hang my head, only his grip stops me, forcing my gaze to his.

“You are everything, Lilly Darling,” he whispers, pulling back, and he gazes at me with swirling blue eyes, full of fierce love and adoration. “Never doubt that. And you noticed now.” I take a deep breath, accepting his words and vowing to myself that I’ll keep an eye on my gentle giant.

“There was something that I wanted to ask you,” I say, nerves floating in my stomach as I look up at him. It’s so silly, given allthat we’ve been through, but I can’t help being a little nervous at what I’m about to ask. Even so, I know that it’s the right decision.

“Shoot,” he tells me, still looking at me like I hung the moon, his blue eyes soft and a little less pain filled.

“So, I was chatting to Lisa the other day, and she, uh, said that she doesn’t have to be the one to deliver the baby. So I was wondering if you would?” I say, stumbling over my words a little. He’s stock still, blinking, his gaze blue fire. “Jax?”

“You want me to deliver your baby?” he asks softly, his voice holding a note of disbelief. I place my hands on his broad chest, feeling his hot skin through his sweat soaked tank top. His heart pounds hard, like he’s just run a marathon.

“I can’t think of anyone else I’d rather have, Jax,” I tell him, my own voice sincere.

A small gasp leaves me as I see the blue of his eyes turn misted once more. His grip on my face tightens.

“These hands have brought so much death, Baby Girl,” he rasps out, and my own breathing becomes painful. “I would be honoured to bring some life into the world for once. Thank you.”

A tear escapes my eye, falling down my tear stained cheek as I lean up, too full to say anything, presenting my lips to him. He kisses me tenderly, as if I am the most precious thing in the world to him. As if I am the light to his dark, the good to his bad. The angel to his monster.

I try to heal him a little with my kiss, tell him that it doesn’t matter what he’s done before, what he might do in order to survive. I love him, flaws, sins and all.

And the room fills with our love as we embrace, chasing away the dark shadows of the past, bathing us in its glow.

I just hope that it’s enough. Julian isn’t finished yet. My punishment still awaits, and I’ve the sinking feeling that whatever it will be, will test us to our limits.

CHAPTER THIRTY-TWO

LILLY

Before I know it, the night of Jax’s fight is upon us, and I’m standing in front of my, well technically Loki’s, mirror. Jax calls himself The Black Knight -gotta love a theme- I looked him up, videos of his fights are on YouTube. From what I can tell, he’s good, really fucking good, his opponents unable to withstand his methodical attacks for very long. His fights are fast and brutal; he doesn’t appear to have ever lost a match and seems to have become a bit of a legend in the underground MMA scene.

I cast my eye over my outfit for tonight, giving myself a smirk in the mirror. I’m soon realising that comfort is key where being pregnant is concerned. So I’ve opted for sexy loungewear, sporting some MagicStitchWitch leggings, in their red astronomy print, my legs a kaleidoscope of reds, oranges, pinks, and electric blue. On my top half, I’m wearing a white tank top that I had printed especially for the occasion. The internet and express shipping really is amazing. For make-up and hair, I’ve gone with dark smokey eyes and messy, tumblingbrunette waves cascading over my shoulders. As I’m not allowed to wear my beloved heels -the guys banned them as soon as we discovered I was pregnant, the fuckturds- I’m wearing a pair of Irregular Choice trainers that Loki bought me as a compromise.

They’re not just any trainers, and I may have launched myself at him when I opened the box. They're platform high tops, covered in a crazy busy Care Bear print, with metallic rainbows on the heels, pink faux fur padded collar, and removable Care Bear plushies in front of the laces.Oh, and they light up, motherfucker!

A low whistle sounds as the man of the hour walks in, and our eyes meet in the mirror -that seems to be happening to me a lot recently. I take Jax in as he stalks towards me, from his black gym shorts, to the all black T-shirt that acts like a second skin, flowing over his muscles, and clinging to every ridge and line.

His lip quirks up as he takes in the design on the front of my tank. It’s the Black Knight Corporation logo, only I changed the text to say ‘The Black Night’, in a font called Beast, which is, well, beast-like. I also included a splash of red in the form of blood splatter across the Knight’s helmet that makes up the normal logo.

“You like it?” I ask as he steps up behind me, engulfing me in his lemon drizzle cake scent, his huge arms coming round and pulling me close.

“I fucking love it, Baby Girl,” he rumbles, nuzzling his nose into my hairline behind my ear, shivers skittering across my skin as he takes a deep inhale. A growl tumbles from his lips, vibrating through me straight to my core. “I’m gonna need you after the fight, baby. But you’ll need to remember your safeword. I won’t be in control, so tell me now if that will be too much.”

My whole body lights up, my breathing picking up as his words settle inside me, starting a flame in my centre.

“I’m fine with that,” I whisper, watching his pupils dilate in the mirror.

“Hard limits?” he asks, watching me back intently. I think for a moment.

“Nothing that might hurt the baby, obviously,” I say, and he gives a sharp nod. “And I think no choking, just to be safe. But you can still put your hand round my throat, just not restrict oxygen.”

“Time to go, bro!” Loki calls from downstairs, interrupting us.

“Let's go, Baby Girl,” Jax murmurs in my ear, taking another deep inhale before stepping back. He takes hold of my hand when I turn round, tugging me downstairs.

“You look hot as fuck, baby mama!” Loki exclaims, his eyes raking over my body. I roll my eyes at him and my apparently new nickname. I still check him out, and he looks mouthwateringly good. He’s wearing a black form fitting T-shirt, too, and snug black ripped jeans, tucked into black biker boots, and what looks like a black bandana around his neck.