Page 45 of Blood Ties

Kai

I watch in disbelief as my brother stalks toward Riley. She recoils as far as she can on the mattress, pressing her bare thighs together, her eyes darting around the basement before settling on me. Wide and terrified.

“Knox!” I try to push myself up, but Dad’s boot presses on my spine, the gun on my head. The grit of the floor digs into my cheek. “Stay away from her!”

He doesn’t look at me. Doesn’t even hesitate a moment as he reaches to undo his belt.

I shove up from the floor, but Dad sends me back down with a blow to the back of the head. I thrash and fight him, trying to stand again and again. He beats me bloody with the gun, until my arms and legs give out and I’m flat on the floor, drooling blood, half-senseless.

“I’ll fucking kill you,” I snarl, even though I know it’s useless. My Dad is grimly silent above me, my uncle chuckling to himself over in the corner. I can’t see Knox’s expression, but I imagine him smirking, and a searing heat fills my chest. “I’ll kill all of you.”

I should have done it sooner. Should’ve slit their throats in their sleep like I once imagined. I imagine the gush of hot blood on my hands, the dumb fucking looks on their faces, and the fire in me burns hotter and hotter.

But I can’t move. Can’t do anything but watch as Knox shoves Riley down on her hands and knees.

I want to look away, but she looks right at me, her gaze holding mine, and it feels like she needs me to see, to witness, to be her anchor.

So I do it. I force myself to watch every second as my brother takes her from behind, as he sweats and swears and degrades her.

Her gaze never leaves mine. She doesn’t so much as flinch as Knox violates her. Her eyes stay on me, and she bites her lower lip so hard it bleeds, but she doesn’t make a sound. Not once.

So I do the same. As much as I want to beg and scream and cry and threaten, I’m not going to make this about me. The only thing I can do right now is to witness her suffering. Imprint every bit of it in my mind so I’ll never forget.

So I’ll remember this, the next time I have a chance to kill every last one of the people who hurt her.

*

A FTER IT’S OVER, DAD and Uncle Frank drag me out of the basement and force me into the attic. Knox watches it happen. They throw me onto the floor, where my legs give out, my battered body too tired to fight anymore. And once they leave, it’s just me in the room with Momma.

Of course the door locks from the outside. Because this room was built to hold Momma, like the basement was built to hold girls like Riley.

I slam my fists into the locked door into my knuckles bleed and scream until my voice gives out.

Then I sink to my knees on the floor and try to breathe through the panic.

It’s suffocating in this room, like the walls are slowly pressing in on me, but worse is the thought of what Knox might do to Riley while I’m cut off from her.

“Momma,” I say hoarsely, looking over at her. “Momma, what am I supposed to do?”

She doesn’t answer. I curl up on the floor, and eventually exhaustion drags me down into the abyss of unconsciousness.

*

A T SOME POINT, I WAKE up to a sharp pain in my head. I groan, and someone shushes me, trickles water into my mouth.

“Momma?” I asks, slurring. My head hurts so fucking bad. Everything hurts. My vision swims.

“Jesus.” A face swims into view above me. Definitely not Momma. Knox, his brow creased in concern. “Dad really fucked you up, huh?”

A flicker of rage makes its way through the pain and confusion as I recognize Knox. Remember what he did. I lift a hand to swipe at him, but he pushes it aside.

“Oh, fuck off,” he mutters. “Just eat. Get your strength back.”

I choke down a few mouthfuls of soup. Then black creeps into the edges of my vision again. In the seconds before unconsciousness takes me, I feel Knox’s hand in the pocket of my jeans, rummaging.

No, I think. The key...

But I’m too tired to even lift my head. I’m gone again, sinking into darkness.

*

W HEN I WAKE UP AGAIN , wincing at the light streaming through the window, there’s a jug of water and some food on the floor in front of me.

I slowly, painfully, drag myself up to a seated position.

I’m tempted to throw the meal, to break the plate and rage.

But I need my strength if I have any hope of escaping with Riley, and so does Momma.

I feed her and then myself, choking it down even though I have no appetite.

The door is still locked. There is nothing to do but limp back and forth in the cramped room and torture myself with my thoughts.

Will they hurt Riley? Will they kill her?

Maybe they already have. I press my ear to the door and strain to listen.

The house is quiet, but the basement is so far away.

Anything could be happening down there in the dark. Knox could be there right now.

I must pass out again, because I wake to the sound of the door opening. It’s Knox, pressing a finger to his lips as he sets down more food and water. It’s dark outside the window, and the house is silent. Sleeping.

I could fight him, or scream, probably get him in trouble with Dad. But trouble isn’t enough to punish him for what he did. I need to bide my time.

“You alright?” Knox asks, as if everything is still the same.

I stare up at him from the floor, fists clenching on my lap. “I’m going to fucking kill you.”

He rolls his eyes. “Oh, get over it. I didn’t do anything that you didn’t do yourself.”

I falter. It’s just for a second, but I know he sees it. He always senses weakness. “That’s not true.”

“No?” He grins, though it’s grim and humorless.

“I had to,” I say. “Dad would’ve shot me.”

“He ordered me to do it too. You think I would’ve gotten off any easier?”

“But...” I shake my head, uncertainty worming its way through the anger that’s been simmering in my chest.

“You think I liked fucking a girl in front of my family? Christ, kiddo. I’m not that kind of messed up.”

“You sure seemed like you didn’t mind,” I grit out.

“I don’t remember you protesting too much, either.”

“She told me to!” The argument sounds weak even to my own ears. Fucking pathetic.

He laughs. “As if she had any choice,” he says. “She knew you couldn’t get it up unless she pretended to like it.”

Pretended ? That cold uncertainty spreads through me. It’s hard to remember now when my brain has tried to black it out for the sake of my own sanity. Was Riley pretending the whole time?

Of course she was. It was stupid to think otherwise. Did I think she really enjoyed my fumbling first time in front of my family?

Knox laughs again at the look on my face. “Trust me,” he says, “I know when a girl is faking.”

I sit frozen, stomach churning.

He sighs and leans forward, grasping the back of my head. “When are you gonna admit it, kiddo?” he murmurs. “We’re more alike than you think.” He smirks. “Even got the same taste in girls. Blood brothers and Eskimo brothers now, ain’t we?”

I shove him off of me and glance sideways at Momma on the bed. She’s as still and silent as always, her gaze distant, but I hate the thought that any part of her might hear this, any of it. I’m sick to my stomach at the thought.

Knox follows my gaze, and the humor drains from his face, along with the color. He looks shaken. Like he had forgotten Momma was here at all.

“Man, fuck this,” he mutters, the slightest tremble in his voice. Then he pulls me in again and kisses my forehead quicker than I can yank out of his grip. “I’m gonna talk to Dad and get you out of here. Just hang tight, kiddo, it’s gonna be alright.”