Page 42 of Blood Ties

Riley

E very time Kai comes down to see me, my heart surges, thinking tonight might be the night he sets me free. But every time, I’m left with a bitter taste on my tongue and a growing sickness in my stomach.

Though that might be more than just the anxiety at work. I’ve been throwing up half my meals, lately, spending most mornings lying sweating and ill on the mattress. I still haven’t mentioned it to Kai. But if I get the sense he’s losing his nerve, I might have to.

Tonight, he seems nervous. He keeps running his fingers through his hair, over and over again. A nervous tic that I’ve never noticed him doing before. It makes my gut tighten with anxiety.

“Is everything okay?” I ask, when I can’t take it anymore.

His eyes dart toward me and then away. “Yeah,” he says. And then, “Well. No.”

He stops there. I wait, heart pounding in my chest, but he doesn’t say more.

“What’s wrong?” I ask, finally.

His mouth works as he seems to struggle for words. He runs his hands through his hair again.

“I got the key,” he whispers. “I’m just trying to figure out the best time to go. But... I think Knox knows something’s going on.”

I stare at him, my mouth going dry.

He swallows. “What if I... ask him to help us?”

“What?” I say, barely a whisper.

Kai avoids my eyes. “I know. But he— I think he’ll be on my side. And it’ll be a lot easier with his help...”

I stare at him, dumbstruck. “And then what?” I ask. “Then he just... goes free? After everything he’s done? He’s a murderer, Kai. And a rapist.”

He sucks in a breath. “I-I know, but...”

My stomach twists, and anger flares up inside of me, too sudden and intense for me to swallow back down.

Because even though I’ve come to care for Kai, sometimes I think he fails to realize that I’m his family’s prisoner.

He’s too cowardly to look the truth in the eye, and I’m not sure how long I can keep playing pretend.

“He raped me , Kai,” I say. “There is no but . He hurt me over and over again, and you did nothing to stop him, and now you want to ask for his help?”

Kai’s mouth hangs open for a second. “But... I did stop him,” Kai says. “I talked to him...” He stops as he sees the look on my face.

“He did stop for a while,” I say. “But he came down here again after...” I swallow. “What happened with those girls.”

Kai’s expression is winded. “No,” he says. “But he said... but he’s been better . I thought...” He curses, and steps forward, pulling me against him. “I’m sorry,” he says, after a moment. “I’m sorry, Riley, I...”

I grab his face and kiss him to silence him. “Don’t apologize,” I whisper, looking him in the eyes. “Just get me out of here, Kai. As soon as you can. And do not involve your fucking brother.”