Page 74 of As The Shifter World Turns

74

NOT HOW I THOUGHT IT WOULD BE—NOT AT ALL

Ryder

When I thought about how things would go with the birth of our child I had this vision of my strong brave mate telling me it was time to go to the hospital. We’d be calm, driving carefully and when we arrived, Ivor would give a huge push and we’d have a perfectly healthy baby half an hour later. Everything was sunshine and roses in my imagination. Maybe I watched too much television. No, I definitely did.

And even though the birth was different than I’d planned, that wasn’t what caught me so off guard. It was our dear sweet perfect child being whisked away to the NICU. There was nothing as heart-wrenching or as scary as watching your child being removed from your arms and being told the doctors and nurses were doing their best.

Did I appreciate the doctor telling us we could be with Dyani? Absolutely. But what he failed to tell us was that while he agreed he needed both of us, he left off the part where he meant I could go with the baby to the NICU and Ivor’s “job” was to gain strength and pump to get his supply coming in.

My mate had come with us initially. He was taken in a wheelchair. But after familiarizing himself with the NICU and meeting the staff, he was taken back to the room sobbing and begged me to watch over our newborn daughter.

I hated it, being torn between making sure my mate was okay, keeping him up to date on our daughter, and being with our sweet girl. She was doing well. Or so the doctors kept telling us. At least she got to stay in my arms. Seeing all the babies who couldn’t be off machines was heartbreaking for me. The noise of beeping was embedded in my brain forever but it was encouraging seeing how dedicated the staff were.

The second day Ivor was able to join me. He looked so frail and frazzled. How they expected him to sleep and “regain his strength” when he was separated from our daughter was beyond me.

“How is she today?” he asked the nurse as he came in, still in his hospital gown and sporting his hospital bracelet. He almost tripped in his haste to catch a glimpse of Dyani, and I tucked my arm in his because he was unsteady on his feet.

“She’s doing well. Between you and me, the doctors are being overly cautious,” she whispered. Her words had me feeling somewhat better.

“I don’t like her being so far away,” Ivor confessed and my heart broke for him. I gave him a peck on the brow and he clung to me.

“That’s because you’re a good father.” She handed him Dyani. “She’s a lucky girl. Why don’t you rock her and wait for the doctor to do his rounds.”

It wasn’t long before the doctor came in. He wanted to try nursing now that the blood sugars were starting to level out.

“And if all goes well?” I asked, wanting to bring my family home, but not too soon. I needed them both good and healthy.

“I feel like she’ll be able to go home sooner than I originally had anticipated.”

“And then how do we know if she needs to come back?” I asked.

“We’ll make sure everyone is comfortable before you leave,” he promised. “And if at any point in time you feel confused or unsure of anything, just let us know.”

That did give me some reassurance.

“But for today, I would like you two to enjoy your time with your baby. I’m going to sign approval for her to be back in the room with you.”

I couldn’t help it, my arms were wrapped around the poor doctor, my eyes filling with tears. As scary as all of this was, I was starting to see a light.

A few hours later we were nestled back in Ivor’s room, just the three of us… my family.

“You’re such a sweet girl… so strong.” Ivor kissed the top of her head. “Daddy loves you so much. Both of your fathers do.”

She was going to be okay. More than okay. She was going to be perfect. Absolutely perfect.

“Ivor, how are you feeling... physically?” He didn’t look good, but how could he with all the worry sitting on his shoulders?

“The doctor says I’m good to go.”

“But… how are you feeling? The doctor saying you are fine and you feeling fine are two different things.”

“I’m so tired,” he admitted. “Having her gone and you gone was too much.”

“Let me hold our darling babe and you try and get some sleep. I promise to wake you if she needs to eat or if the doctor has any news you need to hear. ”

He gave me a single nod, handed her to me and settled his head against his pillow. I half expected him to argue and tell me he was fine, but he didn’t, instead allowing sleep to take over.

Ivor did look better when he woke. Not fully rested, of course, but better.

It was a long next couple of days in the hospital. For all they tell you to rest, they sure came in a lot to ask questions or to take a reading or what not.

“Archer just texted.” I said as Ivor settled back into bed after placing Dyani in her bassinet. “He wanted to know if you were up for a visitor.”

“Do you think he can stay for a few hours?” His question confused me and he must’ve sensed it, quickly adding on, “So you can go home and shower and change and all that.”

“I don’t want to leave you… either of you,” I said.

“And I don’t want a stinky mate,” he countered, pinching his nose.

“Fine.” But only because I knew everyone was going to be okay. “I’ll ask.”

Archer did come and sat with Ivor, the two of them discussing the aftermath of giving birth on their bodies as I walked out. It was not a conversation I felt overly sad about leaving. Not at all.

At home, I took a speedy shower, threw on new clothing and packed a small bag for Ivor because there were some things he’d forgotten. I also ran the vacuum in the nursery, double checked everything was in order, and grabbed a cute outfit for our sweet girl to come home in.

And wear it home she did, only a couple of days later, the doctors giving her a clean bill of health

My family was home, right where they ought to be.