Page 4 of A Quiet Man

It had been a pretty safe area at the time. Even so, Diego actually had managed to get into some real trouble here once (trust him), so for a little while they'd all been banned from the docks. Tomas had missed it with a wistful earnestness, as much as if he'd been forbidden to read. He looked forward to the docks all school year, when he was rarely able to take the trip there (and even if he could, nobody would go with him, so it wasn't as fun or as likely to be allowed), and he'd been saving stale bread, a little treasure trove that would be spent in minutes when the seagulls arrived, screaming and swooping, big tough seagulls with a hunger for junk food, or at least stale bread. They were badass, those seagulls — and so beautiful.

He watched them now, hands stuffed in his pockets, mesmerized by their beauty and how clean they looked even though he knew they were actually pretty filthy, a positive hotbed of germs. They ignored him pretty quickly when they recognized he didn't have anything for them — just another boring adult without food — but he watched and watched, thinking of other days, wondering why he felt so melancholy for them.

Perhaps because back then, he hadn't known he'd be alone forever. It made him sad. It wasn't as though he wanted someone in his life — or at least, if he did, he shouldn't be so turned off by literally every sexual approach — but a deep sadness had settled within him. Nobody was going to get past these barriers he had up, the ones he didn't even understand. Nobody would know how, since he didn't himself.

And did he want someone to? Did he actually want to fall in love and stay that way, spend his life with another person? It was hard to imagine wanting to share that much of himself with anyone, even leaving aside the sex. And yet when he thought of never having that, he felt sad. To be alone sometimes was nice; to have his own space was nice. And yet, to always have it, forever, felt like the sort of curse unkind gods would bestow on someone they especially wanted to punish. "You wanted to be alone? Oh, you'll be alone — forever."

He shuddered at a sudden chill in the shift of the wind, and a seagull screamed vengefully.

He turned and walked away from the edge of the pier.

A slim figure stepped out of the shadows and started towards him with jerky, defiant steps. Tomas stopped, a sense of foreboding trip-hammering his heart. Of course, this place hadn't been particularly dangerous when he was a boy, but those days were past now. The docks could hold all sorts of dangers if you were unlucky. He was an off-duty cop without his strong partner or a weapon on him. Maybe he should have gone somewhere else to brood.

Then he recognized the fresh, acned face of a skinny, hungry teenager. The tough guy was little more than a boy. He had the hard twist to his mouth of someone who hadn't let himself cry and still needed to, badly, but had been kicked around enough by life that he couldn't anymore.

"Suck your dick?" he offered, voice cracking. "Ten bucks." He was shivering — possibly not just from the cold.

Tomas held his gaze sternly. "Probably best if you don't. I'm a cop."

"Oh, shit." The boy turned and started to run. He was new at this, or he'd have stayed out of reach better.

Tomas made a grab and caught his sleeve. "I'm not going to arrest you. Let's get you home safe, and we'll say no more about it."

He was taking a risk here, but it paid off. When he saidhome, the kid stopped trying to get free, like all the fight and the hope had gone out of him. The boy gave Tomas a defiant look, jerking his arm away as Tomas let him go. "Ha. Shows what you know, pig. I haven't got one anymore."

"Well, that sucks. You'll need shelter for the night. There's—"

He paused. He'd been about to offer the youth shelter, but a better idea presented itself. It wasn't following the rules, technically — but then he wasn't on the clock. No way was he arresting or detaining this kid tonight and putting him through the system.

"I've got a friend who's a wolf," he said abruptly, before he could change his mind. "He and his husband take in a lot of foster kids. What's one more for tonight?" Tomas gestured around to the rapidly darkening skies. "Nasty night to be without a home." He watched the kid; the mention of a husband was deliberate. A homeless kid offering to suck dick for money might feel safer with a married gay man than in the system.

The boy hunched his shoulders, shivered, and looked at Tomas with tormented eyes. "Will you tell him..." His words trailed off in obvious embarrassment.

Tomas hesitated. "I don't have to. He's a good guy. He was on the streets himself, so he knows what it's like. I don't think he'd kick anyone out, no matter why they came to him."

The boy was weighing it up, desperate and trying not to look it. "Can I see your ID? So I know you're a cop?"

Tomas almost laughed.Sure, now you're taking precautions! He schooled his features and managed to treat the request seriously, removing his wallet and showing his ID. The boy gave him a quick look, quizzical, comparing the face to the picture. "You're not just a cop. You're a...wolf partner. That's your friend?"

"Yes."

"So, he's a cop too." The boy shivered harder, wrapped his arms around himself. "I guess I don't have much choice."

He did, but Tomas hoped he'd make the right one.

#

As they drove overto Riley and Justin's place, the boy kept fiddling with the passenger door handle, as if he was practicing in case he had to open it and fling himself out of the moving car. He played nervously with a tongue stud. He shivered less with the heater on high, but he was clearly a bundle of nerves, hunger, and angst, more than the teenage norm.

Tomas debated whether to try to pry information from the kid. But it seemed like too much trouble — and one thing that would make the kid seriously consider ditching him. For once, he felt positively mature, even ancient. Had he ever been this young? His own unhappiness suddenly seemed a lot less intense. He had a warm place to sleep, a car, friends, and a job he liked. He had enough — including a family that loved him.

And would, even if he did fall for a guy someday. He knew that, although he hadn't once, because of things his parents had said — little hints they'd dropped, not to mention the way they'd accepted and loved Riley. They weren't generally what you'd call progressive, and he knew very well they'd much prefer it if he got married and had kids like his older brother. But if he didn't, they could accept it. And even years ago, when he was this kid's age, they might have been very disappointed and even angry, but they'd never have kicked him out into the cold.

"Your wolf lives here? Holy shit, it's a mansion!"

"It's huge, I know. They wanted lots of kids. Him and his husband." He stopped the car, drummed his fingers. "Do you want to wait in the car while I go and talk to him, or would you rather come with me?"

"Dude, you'd trust me in your car? What if I stole it?"