Page 72 of A Kingdom of Fire and Fury (House of Embers #1)

For the rest of the week, we stuck to the plan.

Our evenings were spent out in the woods, but during the day, we explored Kieran’s hometown.

We mostly stayed at the brothel where Madame Bareea delighted in sharing embarrassing stories about Kieran.

Kieran scowled the entire time, but I knew he liked it.

And I liked seeing that side of him. Out in public, we kept a slight distance between ourselves—close enough that we could only be considered coworkers and not… not what we both wanted to be.

I knew it was his way of proving himself.

He never pushed for more since that night, but it was like he knew that sooner or later I’d fall into his arms. I wished I could, and I hated the part of me that wanted to be responsible.

I considered these days a test as well, to see if we could actually make it through these two weeks and have no one even whisper about us being together.

One of the evenings at the end of the week, we went out to the cabin once more. Our dragons lingered nearby as they hunted, leaving us with some alone time. It wasn’t as hard as I thought to be alone with Kieran. Yes, every cell in my body longed to be with him, but I’d gotten good at resisting.

Right now, we both sat across from each other in the cabin. It was so small that our feet nearly brushed. “Do you ever wish that you stayed here? That you didn’t become Kieran the Executioner?”

“Before, I could only ever hope to support Wes and to repay the kindness the villagers had shown me somehow. I hate that I’ve had to hurt innocent people, but I don’t regret staining my soul.

Not when it led to Daeza and when it will hopefully lead to the end of the war.

” Kieran glanced at the wall through the window and then back at me.

“Lofty goals.” I raised my head. “I never had that. I just wanted a nice home for me and my sister. I wanted her potential to be limitless.” And I had that now. Just not in the way I expected.

“My goals weren’t so lofty until I had the opportunity to make them bigger.” He turned his gaze to the bright sky. “How do you feel about it now, Selena? What are your goals?”

“I—”

Something slammed against the wall. My heart skyrocketed, and just as we jumped to our feet, a gryphon threw itself at the window, breaking the glass. Our dragons roared in the distance, and my bond with Umara sparked to life.

Kieran stepped in front of me. The moment the gryphon’s head entered our cabin, Kieran’s shadows set upon it. Crack! Tendrils of shadows snapped the creature’s neck, and it slumped against the wall. Dead .

“Kieran—”

A familiar heat surged a few feet away from us as well as an inhuman screech.

Kieran took my hand, and shadows surrounded us.

We reappeared several feet away just in time to see Umara and Hesperos torching the second gryphon.

Shit. That’s two. If a third appeared, that meant we had a nest on our hands. Shit.

Kieran’s jaw flexed. “Stay on your guard. We’re not leaving until another six hours from now. If there’re any others in the area, they’ll come.”

I shuddered. Umara leaned down and nudged her head against my shoulder. Worry, protectiveness, fear, love . Her flurry of emotions made my knees quake. My hand shook as I rubbed her scales. “I’m okay.”

She growled at Kieran, who ushered me inside.

Umara snatched the dead gryphon out from the window and crunch!

She bit it in half and then turned it to ash with another roar.

My stomach coiled as we sat on the ground, this time with our backs against the wall and both of us facing the broken window.

Umara and Hesperos stayed circled around us, waiting for the attack.

Gods, I felt so exposed. Next time, screw the fucking cabin. We needed a better defense than this. If I had to play bait for the good of the country, then I was going to give Luther some demands. Fuck being set up like this.

Six hours passed in tense silence. Neither of us talked. Not when the threat of gryphons loomed over us. But thankfully, no more gryphons came. “At least we don’t have another nest on our hands. ”

Kieran nodded. “We’re going to spend the night in the inn. I’m not going to risk your safety.” But doing so would risk the others. Even so, selfishly, I didn’t care. This was Luther’s fault for not sending us enough back-up. Or a legit base to stay in.

I let Kieran handle the logistics as we went to an inn at the very edge of the capital.

It was actually a decent amount away from the majority of the town, clearly meant for weary travelers to stop.

From the pale and annoyed expression of the innkeeper, I had an inkling of what Kieran was telling him.

And that was only confirmed when thirty minutes later, the inn was fully evacuated as were the first ten houses by the inn.

Though the innkeeper stubbornly insisted on staying.

I felt guilty being the magnet for danger that I was. Especially when some of the people shot me looks, but they stopped when Kieran glared at them. When we went to our room on the second floor, Kieran murmured in my ear, “Don’t let it get to you.”

I scowled. “How can I not? They looked at me like I was misfortune incarnate. And maybe I am.” The empty inn could attest to that. The lonesome halls had sent shivers down my spine. Would this be my future?

Before I could blink, Kieran was cradling my face in his calloused hands.

“Don’t listen to them. Your gift will save lives.

If they’re too blind to see it, that’s their problem.

Yes, your ability has some drawbacks, but without you, we’d be fumbling in the dark.

Fuck them. You’re so fucking important, Selena, don’t let yourself think otherwise. ”

I swallowed. “Okay.”

He stroked my jawline. “I’ll make you believe it. You’ll see.”

I forced a smile. I wanted so badly to sink into his arms and his comfort. But I couldn’t. When Kieran reluctantly pulled away, he got to work setting up dinner for us—dried meats and cheeses that he’d packed. But he also brought out some chocolate.

“When did you get that?” I asked as I sat down.

Kieran lit one of the candles and placed it between us. The dim atmosphere soothed my nerves in ways I couldn’t quite explain. Maybe because with it, Kieran could use his powers to the fullest. “I packed it in the beginning. Figured you might want a pick me up. It’s been one hell of a day.”

I fought a snort and tried to ignore the burning behind my eyes.

I looked at Kieran, at the way his eyes seemed to glow in the shadowed light.

This past week I’d seen a whole new side to Kieran.

A side that was… soft. Maybe this was what he could have been if he wasn’t a dragonsguard.

He played with children, supported the local businesses, and just… existed.

But that’s not his path anymore. And I got the feeling, even if life hadn’t chosen him as a rider, he wouldn’t have been content to merely work for his family. He’d want more because he was Kieran and wouldn’t settle for less.

“How did you manage to do it?” I asked. “Everyone at the capital sees you as a cruel man. Kieran the Executioner, the Reaper, and the Demon King. How do you become that without losing yourself?” For everything that was to come, for the war that Andova wanted…

I couldn’t lie to myself. There was no way I’d escape it.

But what would happen to me? I told myself I had a line, but could I manage to stay behind it?

No one else in the dragonsguard had resisted the call to step over it. Could I really be the first?

“Daeza.” Kieran set his fork down. “When I feel like I’m losing myself or my goals, I go to Daeza. Whenever I see the town, it makes it all worth it. They’re living peacefully without fear of dragon fire or gryphons or just the bullshit going on. I want that for everyone else, so I keep fighting.”

I sipped my water. “How long do you think it’ll take for Luther to let Clara live with me?”

Kieran paused. “Most likely three years.”

It felt like a sucker punch. “And what about you?”

He met my gaze, unflinching. “I said a year, and I intend to honor that. It won’t be easy, but we’ll manage.” There it was again—that look in his eyes. An unspoken challenge.

I swallowed. “Kieran, I…” Logic said I should stay away. My heart said I should go for it. What would Clara say? “I don’t want to be selfish. Not for Clara. Not when I already hurt her.”

He reached forward and cradled my hand. “You know how you always say I’m a manipulative asshole? Do you still think that?”

I searched his gaze. “Absolutely.” My feelings hadn’t blinded me to that.

His lips curved into a smile before a serious expression overtook it. His eyes blazed. “Am I one to do something to hurt my goals?”

“You said you were by pursuing me.”

He tilted his head thoughtfully. “It’s a risk, yes, but it doesn’t destroy my goal, even if it were to get out.”

“That doesn’t help me.” Because all the consequences were on me rather than him.