Page 39 of A Game of Monsters (Realm of Fey #4)

The mass of swirling, destructive power that was Duwar had spread like spilled ink across Durmain’s landscape. It was a scar upon the world, a shadow demanding all light. Within it, flashing with flames amongst thick unnatural smoke, a monster roamed, but not one made from flesh and bone – one crafted from the twisted will of a person’s final wish.

Ash coated the air, spoiling each inhalation, lathering my tongue with the taste of… death.

This was a disease on the realms – a physical reflection of Cassial’s intent and promise.

Duncan had been the one to fly me toward it, with Erix following not far behind. Even from my distance, I couldn’t fathom just how far the disease had spread. Miles. Leagues. Where human towns and villages had once been, was now swallowed whole by the gaping maw of this beast. It had almost reached past Wychwood’s borders, creeping closer toward those who dwelled in the fey land. Whatever it had touched was left drained of life. Trees bowed, limbs frail and colourless. Even the air it touched seemed poisoned with the promise of more ruin.

We’d left Grove just as the mass of power overcame it, swallowing everything I had ever known in darkness.

And it wasn’t going to stop. Devouring, destroying – but also something else.

It was searching. A broken lover, searching for the other part of them. The shard inside of me. I knew it like a deep keening cry as the part of Duwar inside of me rose its head like a serpent from its nest.

“Where are the humans who lived in the affected areas?” It was the first question I asked after we landed. “Tell me they are safe…”

Gyah had not long transformed back into her fey form, smoke still slithering off her shoulders as though like called to like within the wall of storm half a mile ahead of us. We hadn’t shared a moment of relief at seeing one another, because there hadn’t been the chance. But we did share a look, one that spoke a thousand words. I had questions for Gyah, relating to Seraphine and her layers of plans. In time, if we survived this, we would discuss them.

“They have been evacuated into fey lands, as many as we could manage,” Gyah said, voice thick with tension. “I believe those were your orders, to get them into Icethorn.”

Relief swelled thick within me. “They were.”

“Any we could not reach in time are currently on their way toward Lockinge,” Gyah added. “We are trying to get as many people as possible away from this ruin, in hopes it gives us time to find a solution to this. Rafaela has promised haven in Irobel for children, women and the weak. But that blessing will only last until this rot turns its attentions to the seas and passes over them.”

“Which is looking to be soon,” Althea added. Her brow had furrowed as flame-filled eyes settled on the rolling mass of darkness. It swallowed up the sun, spoiling the sky in clouds of dark grey. “There is no power strong enough to battle this back. This is chaos incarnate. I have tried with my own magic, and the wall only seems to feed on it. But you, Robin – you will succeed.”

Gyah stiffened, placing a hand on Althea’s arm. “He has no choice but to beat this. We are all relying on you, friend.”

I rolled my shoulders. “Thanks for the reminder.” I flashed a pathetic grin at Gyah, one she gave me back, whereas her golden eyes revealed the concern she harboured inside for me.

I felt Erix’s and Duncan’s eyes bore into my skin. If I was brave enough, I would’ve looked at them in return, but I couldn’t take my eyes off the ruin as it raced toward us. Billowing clouds spat out of the mass, roaring and spitting, devouring fields. As it touched the earth, it leached the colour, draining the very ground of the life it held.

No, not draining.

It was taking the power back.

It was Duwar who made this world, and it would be Duwar who’d destroy it.

“Althea and Gyah, you should leave now for Wychwood,” Duncan said, voice raised above the sky-shattering roar of Duwar. “Gather a council, perhaps for any outcome. If Robin is unsuccessful, the doom falls back into our hands. We cannot waste time in searching other avenues.”

“It won’t be good enough,” Gyah snapped. “There is nowhere we can hide from this.”

“I will fix this,” I said, turning my back on the ruin to face my allies.

I took my turn drinking them in, smiling naturally, as if death didn’t race toward us. Althea, the fierce warrior. Gyah, the loyal protector. Erix, the guardian of my heart. And Duncan, the man who had hunted me down and captured my love. Four of the most important people in my life. People I’d give my life for, over and over.

“Robin, ready?” Erix asked, speaking for the first time since we arrived here. He was haunted by the possibility of his greatest fears but daring to admit them aloud.

“I am,” I said to him, then swept my gaze over the small group. “And it’s all going to be okay, I promise.”

Duncan’s eyes filled with tears, but this time he held them back, showing me the strength that I willed him to have. “You’ve got this, darling. Show that fucker exactly who you are, and what you are capable of.”

The sky roared louder as the storm of ruin closed in. I could see Gyah’s urgency to leave in her inability to stand still. Althea too. “Althea, let’s go.”

“Yes,” I agreed. “You need to leave. Get as far away as you can. Remember… I will see you soon.”

Gyah’s jaw tensed, lips pursing as she regarded me. “You better, Robin.”

I nodded, smiling through the prick of tears behind my eyes. “I will.”

“I don’t want to leave you,” Althea said, looking at me like I was crazed. She waved a hand, gesturing for us to make a move. “If you are to face this, you do it with all of us behind you.”

“Oh, Althea,” I said, grasping her hands and squeezing. “We both know that Gyah is never going to let you put yourself in any more danger than you’ve already faced.”

“The princeling is right,” Gyah said, tears spilling over her lips and curling down her chin. “But may I remind his lordship that if he doesn’t come out of this alive, I will personally find his corpse and punch him in the dead face.”

“If anything is enough motivation to beat this, that would be it,” I laughed, sweeping my eyes over them all. “I won’t fail because I know what I am fighting for – who I am fighting for.”

“Comforting words, Robin,” Gyah said, clutching Althea, who’d paled rapidly, colour draining from her face. “But if you survive this, I’m still going to beat the shit out of you.”

“What for this time?”

“Scaring me,” Gyah replied. “Always scaring me.”

Gyah embraced me, holding me as if it was the final time. Which it might be. She brought her lips to my ear and whispered words meant only for me. “Before you go, Seraphine wanted me to remind you to be selfish.”

“Seemed that she wanted a couple of people to remind me.” A warm rush of shivers passed down my spine. “Well, you know me. It’s one thing I’m good at.”

“You deserve to live, just remember that. I think that is what she meant.”

I took Gyah’s reminder, storing it away in the chambers of my heart.

I turned next to Erix and Duncan, who stood side by side, equal in height, power and determination. For the first time, taking steps toward them was hard. But I did it, because I reminded myself that this was for them.

For the men who held my heart.

For the men who showed me the world I wanted to be a part of.

I’d do this for them – over and over, if given the choice. Because that was what love was, perseverance. Choice. And most importantly, power.

The ground shook as the mass of chaos and power raced closer. My core tensed, just to keep me standing steady, my boots sinking into mud-trodden earth. The more time that passed, the heavier the taste of ash and decay became. It lathered my tongue, tainting each inhalation and making the exhalation no more pleasurable.

I didn’t turn to watch it arrive.

Althea took me in her arms a final time and wished me luck. From the shake of her voice alone, I knew she had little faith I was going to survive this.

But I would. I had too. I would survive, because we had finally achieved our tomorrow, and I wasn’t going to give up on it.

Not yet.

“If there is anyone as stubborn enough to survive this, it is you.” Althea’s words warmed me from the inside out. Her stare was determined, and yet there was no denying the quiver in each word and what that meant. “Beat it.”

“I’m not going to let a little storm cloud ruin my day, Althea.”

She sniffed, drying her face with the back of her hand. “You better not. We deserve peace. All of us. That includes you.”

“Something we can agree on.”

She knocked my shoulder with her fist, stepping back before her body betrayed her. “It’s a possibility. I just wish it was not you who had to deal with it.”

“We all have a purpose, perhaps this is mine.”

Fire lit within Althea’s eyes, and then it was the Queen of Cedarfall who stood before me. “It better be, Robin Icethorn.”

Gyah gathered Althea back, otherwise she would’ve never left me. “We love you, friend. Remember that.”

“How could I ever forget?” I replied, offering her a sympathetic smile. “Is your promise of punching me still on the table?”

“Of course it is,” Gyah snapped, her forced anger melting back into trepidation that they all faced me with. “If you die and upset Althea any more than she has already been, I’ll find a way to strangle your ghost. Just live , Robin.”

“That’s the plan.” I squeezed her fingers back. “Now, get Althea out of here.”

As Gyah drew back, her skin melted to shadow and revealed the Eldrae lurking beneath. When she replied, it was half in words and the other half a tempered growl. “Already on it.”

Watching Althea and Gyah leave was the most painful part. It solidified their goodbye into a physical thing, rather than words. There was so much that could’ve been said, but we didn’t have time.

When I turned to Erix and Duncan – my strength incarnate – I found my knees weakening. I had to pretend I was okay, but looking at them, taking in the horror plastered across each of their faces, ruined me.

“Look after each other,” I said before gritting my teeth to stop the sob from breaking free. “Promise me that at least.”

Duncan steeled his expression, the scar down the side of his face deepening. He nodded, because clearly forging a word was impossible. I could sense it, in a way, his need to demand we all leave and find another way to solve this. But he knew, just as I did, that this was the only option.

“We will not be far, little bird,” Erix said, stepping in and taking my hands. He was cold to the touch, as though the worry he held for me leached the warmth from his skin and soul. He had a haunted look about him, his pupils far too dilated for normal. “This is not a goodbye. It is only a see you soon.”

“We will be reunited with you on the other side,” Duncan added.

These could be my final words to them, I wouldn’t part with a lie.

I lifted a hand, placing it carefully on the side of Erix’s face. The second I touched him, Erix melted into my hold, leaning into my palm and releasing a groan. “I need you to say it, Robin. Tell me this is not a goodbye.”

“Robin?” I spluttered feigned surprise to lighten the tension. “Is this really the time for using my actual name?”

His silver eyes pooled with tears. “You’ve always been Robin. My Robin, my little bird. The man who inspires me, the man who changed me and the man who saved me.”

“I haven’t saved you yet,” I reminded him, the lump in my throat becoming unbearable.

Erix closed his famously silver eyes. “You know exactly what I mean.”

“I know.” A pain shuddered in my chest, part from emotion and the rest from the chasing storm of chaos at my back. It was gaining. Quickly. “This isn’t over. We promised each other a tomorrow, and I am far too selfish to not see it through.”

“Being selfish is not a bad thing,” Erix added, staring deep into my soul. “You have always punished yourself for making decisions on your own, when all your life that is what you have relied on yourself to do.”

“It has taken a long time to work that out, but I see it now. Because of you, because of your patience and guidance.”

“It is my honour.”

“As my personal guard?” I said, with a smirk that was seconds from breaking into a chest-breaking cry.

“No, little bird. As the man who loves you, without bounds and limitations.”

I trailed my hand down his cheek, brushing my thumb over his lips. “I love you too, Erix.” My eyes lifted over Erix’s shoulder, coming to rest on Duncan, who had not stopped smiling toward us. “And you, Duncan Rackley. Come here.”

Duncan lifted a finger to his eye, lowered to his heart and then slowly pointed toward me. Those actions spoke more than words. Duncan took confident steps, closing the space between us. Erix took the moment to step back, allowing room for Duncan, respecting that we all needed equal time.

As much as we pretended this was not a goodbye, it certainly felt like it. But I wouldn’t leave until I had given them both their final command.

“You’re the bravest person I know,” Duncan said, running his hands up my arms as though using his last moments to memorise me. “I saw it in your eyes the first time we met, and I see it now. You’ll do anything for the people you love, and that is an admirable trait.”

Duncan leaned in and placed a kiss on my cheek. His lips brushed the corner of my mouth, and I fought the urge to back out of my decision. Which was why he did it – careful not to touch my lips completely. He knew I needed to do this, and no matter if both men hated that truth, neither one would stop me.

I steeled my expression, growing taller and broader, just at his confidence alone. “You’re not going to try and stop me this time, are you?”

Duncan shook his head. “It would be a waste of breath, darling. I’ve tried that before and learned the hard way.”

“Learned that I always do what I want?”

“No. I learned that you do what is necessary to secure the lives of those around you. When you took that vial, believing it was poison, it was to save the realms. That is the most selfless act of anyone I have ever known.”

“I thought the whole point of this was that I was being selfish,” I said, allowing myself to be wrapped up in his arms. His grasp was firm, his newly formed wings folding over me, encapsulating me in heat.

“To be selfish for selfless means is one of a thousand reasons why I admire you.”

“Do we have time for you to share your list with me?” I scoffed, desperately wanting to draw out the moment, but knowing I couldn’t.

The rumbling of thunder at my back told me I was right.

Duncan planted a kiss on my crown, exhaling a hard breath that spoke of a million unsaid things. “How about we make a deal. You go and save the realms, collect that lost part of Duwar, and then I will gladly sit and list every single one of the reasons why I love you.”

“I like the sound of that,” I replied, knowing this moment was coming to an end. But in my last grasp to enjoy this, I shot out a final command for Duncan, perhaps the most important. I made sure to keep my voice to a whisper, something only he could hear.

“Look after Erix,” I whispered.

“He will be fine–”

“No,” I stuttered. “I need to hear you say it. I need you to tell me you will care for him, look after him just as you have with me. He is going to need you – Altar, you’ll need each other.”

“Focus,” Duncan choked. “Then return to us and be the one who completes that task.”

“Duncan,” I warned, the panic bubbling inside of me. “Please, say it.”

He grasped my face, peering down at me. This close, I could see every pore and scar, and what I’d give to kiss each and every one of them one final time. “Okay, darling. It will be done.”

I mouthed my thanks, unable to form the words aloud.

A bout of confidence raced through me as I took in both of my men. Before it faded, I turned my back on them and walked away. I didn’t wait and watch to see them fly away. I didn’t want to see them leave. Instead, I pretended like they were watching me as I walked over the trodden field, toward the moving wall of destruction and chaos.

Silently, with my fading focus, I opened myself up to the whimpering shard of Duwar in my chest. I coaxed it free, encouraging the broken power to rise to the surface. It came with ease, with bright wings of a white dove. I felt it rise in me, just like the ice I housed in my blood, except this was potent… ancient.

I faced the wall of power and sensed it the same moment it sensed me. I felt its course change in a heartbeat, as the rolling clouds of decay shifted in my direction and picked up speed.

The part of Duwar that had lingered in that storm found what it was looking for. Just as I hoped it would. And as the power demanded, it made toward me with haste.

In the face of danger, my mind lingered back to a moment many months ago.

Locked in a Hunter’s cage, surrounded by frightened fey expecting to meet their end, I had comforted a child. The technique I used was one my father had taught me, over and over, as I grew up and discovered new fears. It was strange, because in that moment, I found myself reverting back to it.

So, I began to count.

“One.”

The air scorched with power, making the hairs on my body stand to attention.

“Two.”

I pictured two men in my mind, one with eyes of silver, the other with jewelled eyes of green. They stood, watching and proud, with nothing but the confidence that I would survive this. I had to believe them, otherwise I’d never make it through.

“Three.”

I wondered if my mother and her family had the time to prepare when the monsters came to kill them. Was it better to meet death unsuspecting, or with the time to prepare for the unpreparable?

“Four,” I screamed, finding my confidence wavering as the wall chased closer, tearing up earth, leaving nothing but char in its wake.

“Five.”

I laid a hand over my chest, as if that would prevent it from splitting through bone, muscle and flesh.

“Six.”

There were no more tears to cry. I knew why I was doing this. For me, for Erix, for Duncan and for every life that also waited for this doom to come and claim them.

“Seven.”

Breathe, Robin. Breathe.

“Eight.”

Duwar – or what remained of its corruption – was so close that I felt my skin singe. The violent clouds spat and hissed, like a beast loose from its cage, ready to wreak punishment on a world that had only ever used and abused it.

“Nine.”

Power licked at my skin. I pinched my eyes closed as my name rang out at my back.

“Ten–”

Chaos engulfed me.