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He held his hands out with glee.
‘I need to light it for you. I can’t really give you an entire box of matches,’ I said, putting the cigarette to my lips. It had been a long time since I had smoked a cigarette.
I heard a rustle behind the bars of Cupcake’s prison. I looked through the gaps and saw a man had pushed himself right against the bars of his own cage. He had made himself a bed on some leaves. He was looking down in his lap. I felt sorry for him.
‘Hey,’ I called to him. He nodded back at me. I was happy just talking to Cupcake for now. It was easy discourse.
When it was lit, I handed the cigarette through the bars to Cupcake. He sucked it and held the smoke inside, a satisfiedsmile creeping across his lips until his whole face was full of joy. I heard groans of protests coming from some of the other cages.
‘Tell them I’ll bring more tomorrow,’ I said to Cupcake. He nodded but continued to smoke the cigarette. I didn’t speak to him for five minutes as he smoked it down to the nub. I found a spot on the ground next to the cage.
Cupcake shoved the butt into the earth.
‘Thank you.’
‘So what did you do? To find yourself here.’
Cupcake shook his head. ‘What did any of us do? No trial, no justice. Just this. Locked up.’
‘Avril said . . .’ I started.
Cupcake looked serious. ‘We all know what Avril says. But do you believe her?’ He jerked his chin out and widened his eyes.
I looked shamefully at my feet. I was here tonight because I was too scared to stand up to Avril, and I didn’t know the answers or the truth. I only knew what she had told me. But here were fifteen men all locked up. What was I to think?
Cupcake sat down close to the edge of the bars.
‘I’ve had a lot of time to think in here and sometimes...’ he grabbed the bar with his hand ‘...I get very angry. But what can I do?’ He looked up at me with pleading eyes.
‘I don’t know what to say,’ I said pathetically ‘I’m sorry. I...’
‘I get it – you’re scared,’ Cupcake said.
I felt my hackles rise. I had been scared of Bruno, but I had got away. If I was brave enough to do that, I was surely brave enough to face this scenario head-on. Avril had lied to me from the beginning, about where I was headed, about Clara, about who I was sharing the island with.
‘So what will you do, Sadie?’ Cupcake’s voice filtered through. ‘You’ve been given a job now, no? Look after us, poor silly men.’
‘I have been assigned the task of checking in on you regularly.’
‘But not sitting here and chatting with me.’
‘Probably might be frowned upon.’
‘By Avril, your boss? And you do everything she says?’
‘No,’ I said quickly.
‘I can hear a faraway beat. Another party tonight?’ Cupcake looked into the distance as though he might be able to see what he could just about hear.
I didn’t mention the men arriving or the way the girls had been draped over them when I left, or my fear for James and his companion.
‘Yes, they like to party.’
‘And you? You’re not a party animal?’
‘Oh, I’ve been known to throw a few shapes from time to time.’
Cupcake laughed then, and I wondered how it felt to be locked up and not able to go anywhere for years. Yet still be able to laugh that way. I thought about Clara then and how she would have made him feel. Did she give him the hope that he needed to get through a day? When I glanced around at the other men, they all had a glassy look in their eyes. Some were just lying there, not moving. I felt a stab of sadness in my gut, and it rose up into my chest.